Mom; Joanie Leaves Chachi

ALTERNATE HISTORIAN'S NOTE: we have our second anniversary coming up on May 27th, and we would like to have another contest. For our second anniversary, send us up to three of your own alternate histories, and we will publish the best - no limit on how many will end up on the final page! We would like to see as many of you enter this as possible, so please - think 'em up, write 'em down, and send 'em on to us at rat4cat@gmail.com! Help us celebrate our 2nd year of existence in style! Oh, and if you're like Sean and we owe you an appearance in TIAH - email us! SEAN - EMAIL - NOW!

May 8th, 2006

in 199,265 BCE, the mother of all humanity gave birth to the first of her many children in southern Africa. She never got a card from a single one of them.

in 1886, Dr. John Pemberton’s Coca Elixir began being sold from Jacob’s Pharmacy in Atlanta, Georgia. The powerful medicine brightened the outlook and put pep in the steps of Georgians for years until cocaine was outlawed. This quelled Pemberton's desire to find the “perfect” health drink, and he was able to put more attention into his own shop, where he and his wife made a comfortable living.

in 1915, Admiral Esteban Rodriquez arrives back in the P'Karsai nebula to find that Dr. Argus McCloud and his small shuttle crew have the situation well in hand. With the water on the Kainku world and the materials Admiral Rodriquez brings with him, Dr. McCloud is able to produce a neural neutralizer for everyone in Rodriquez's fleet, and contact between the Congress of Nations and the Kainku resumes.

in 1937, gadfly writer Thomas Pynchon was born in Glen Cove, New York. This publicity-hungry writer entered the New York City literary scene with his short story The Small Rain and became a permanent fixture wherever a party or camera was to be found. Among his many stunts were the planting of the little symbols from The Crying of Lot 49 all over New York City, and the organization of the alternate postal system from that book.

in 1970, Pete Best’s album So It Goes is released. It marks the turning point for his career as he abandons the old Liverpool sound for a new, more bluesy American musical style. Many of his British fans feel it is a betrayal, but critics across the pond embrace the album as Best’s finest work to date. He also buys a mansion in America this year, which further alienates those still listening for the naive young man from Liverpool.

in 1984, in a twist ending, Joanie left Chachi at the altar on Happy Days. The plans for a spinoff series starring the two characters had fallen through, and the actors had not renewed their contracts for Happy Days, so they were written out with this episode. There was a brief surge of fan support to get them back together, but the series was not renewed after that point.

in 1985, the Council of Wisdom asks to see Chelsea Perkins, and she goes before them. The Council is composed of different members than in her own time, and she only recognizes a couple of them. They ask her about her own future activities, which she is careful to tell in a highly flattering light. She leaves the meeting feeling good about her chances of being sent back to her own time.

in 1991, William Webster, the CIA director under George Bush, resigns prior to giving testimony against Bush in the Iran-Contra hearings. This is the final nail in the coffin of Bush’s presidency, and he himself resigns a month later. The Republican Party, held together mainly by nostalgia since the fall of communism, splinters after the loss of a second president to scandal in recent memory, and its members drift into the Libertarian Party and the newly-formed Independent Party.

in 1997, V-A (Victory in America) Day is celebrated in Great Britain, Egypt and China as the war in America is over. All prisoners of war were released and sent home, and the allied powers began reconstructing the American government; along the old lines in the east, where British and Egyptian forces held control, and along communist lines in the west, where the Chinese troops held the reins.

Timelines in today's post: the Mlosh, Pete Best, the Chelsea Perkins timeline and the Ralph Shephard timeline

Today's "Six Degrees of Star Trek" challenge: Connect Thomas Pynchon: A Journey Into the Mind of P. to Star Trek. Place your answers in the comments and see the Forum for previous results. For more on 6 degrees games, click here.

Get yourself into TIAH!

And, another cool thing - Let us know where you are on Frappr!

The Forum lives again!

Good long fiction from the AH. See a review of Warp at Universe Pathways Magazine

Help the Alternate Historian get a better day job!
My email address for contacting me with your good news, or for more direct goodness, go to the web site and leave a comment, buy a book, or leave a Paypal donation! Remember, it's only 6 degrees of separation between you and anyone else - and thanks again!

You can also visit the Co-Historian's store -

Mother's Day

May 8th, 2005

in 199,265 BCE, the mother of all humanity gave birth to the first of her many children in southern Africa. She never got a card from a single one of them.

in 1886, Dr. John Pemberton’s Coca Elixir began being sold from Jacob’s Pharmacy in Atlanta, Georgia. The powerful medicine brightened the outlook and put pep in the steps of Georgians for years until cocaine was outlawed.

in 1910, Q’Bar ships in retreat from the Mlosh homeworld engage with Jovian raiders at the C’Tabo’Liet system and are utterly destroyed. Jovian representatives at the Barnard Star talks begin to press for concessions from the Q’Bar, emboldened by how well the war is going for them.

in 1937, gadfly writer Thomas Pynchon was born in Glen Cove, New York. This publicity-hungry writer entered the New York City literary scene with his short story The Small Rain and became a permanent fixture wherever a party or camera was to be found.

in 1970, Pete Best’s album So It Goes is released. It marks the turning point for his career as he abandons the old Liverpool sound for a new, more bluesy American musical style. Many of his British fans feel it is a betrayal, but critics across the pond embrace the album as Best’s finest work to date.

in 1984, in a twist ending, Joanie left Chachi at the altar on Happy Days. The plans for a spinoff series starring the two characters had fallen through, and the actors had not renewed their contracts for Happy Days, so they were written out with this episode.

in 1991, William Webster, the CIA director under George Bush, resigns prior to giving testimony against Bush in the Iran-Contra hearings. This is the final nail in the coffin of Bush’s presidency, and he himself resigns a month later.

in 1997, VA Day is celebrated in Great Britain, Egypt and China as the war in America is over. All prisoners of war were released and sent home, and the allied powers began reconstructing the American government; along the old lines in the east, where British and Egyptian forces held control, and along communist lines in the west, where the Chinese troops held the reins.


Forum Link - contribute to our magazine!

Poll Link: What direction should we take?

Warp and Protocols still available, but see our new direction announced here

Calhoun Resigns; Strange Days In Italy

December 28th, 2005

in 47,392 BCE, Swikolay, great-granddaughter of Telka the Speaker, has a dream of standing on the top of the Himalayas and still being unable to reach the stars. Disturbed, she wakes Telka and tells her that they will still fail, in spite of all their work. Telka tells her, “We will still climb. Dreams can lie; only believe what you have done with your own hands.”

in 1781, the British fortify Prince Edward Island with hundreds of troops under the command of Major James Henry Craig. He was reinforced by American colonials, which sparked a huge degree of resentment among the Canadians and led to a chill in relations between the Nationalists and the Americans.

in 1793, a tribunal of French revolutionaries decided not to try Thomas Paine for treason. He had traveled to France to take part in the revolt of the people against their monarch, but had run afoul of some in the revolutionary leadership because of his resistance to the death penalty. His moving speech in his own defense led to a change in the revolution’s direction, and an abolition of the guillotine and the death penalty in France.

in 1832, Andrew Jackson's vice-president, John C. Calhoun, resigns to take a Senate seat from South Carolina. The move is widely seen as a lack of confidence in Jackson, and is proven right when Jackson loses the presidential election that year, leaving office after only one term.

in 1849, French industrialist Jolly-Bellin accidentally spills turpentine and oil from a lamp onto his dirty clothes and notices that they have become cleaner. Unfortunately, his clothes ignite from the flame he brings closer to see this, and he is killed in the resulting fire.

in 1900, fiery brothel owner Carry Nation attacks a small group of Temperance protesters outside her establishment in Wichita, Kansas, injuring one of them with an ax. Nation had tumbled into the darker side of life since falling into alcoholism herself with her first husband, and ran the brothel after his death in order to support herself. She resented the self-righteousness of Wichita's Temperance movement and hated Cora Weathers, the woman she attacked with the ax, more than anything. She was jailed for assault and spent many months behind bars.

in 1904, a hastily-arranged second mission to the Mlosh homeworld is launched in secret from the Plutonian base of the Congress of Nations. This one is carrying heavy armament, and is crewed by an all-military team.

in 1908, a massive earthquake strikes Europe, centered on Italy. In the aftermath of the quake, strange beasts and people were seen on the Mediterranean coast. There were strange sailing vessels from China and South America, as well as some kind of flying ship, spotted over Italy. When authorities arrived to investigate these claims, the strange sightings were already over, except for an aerial phenomena over Messina. It was thought to be a cloud, but it pulsed with colors like a rainbow. An American scientist, Dr. Richard Tolman, consulted with the Italian government about it.

in 12-19-11-16-5, Manpuigachet, high priest of the written word, is born in Chuquisaca, among the Inca. His words moved armies and quieted emperors; he could seduce the most chaste of virgins, or douse the flame of passion in the most arduous lovers. At his death in 12-18-17-4-12, the whole of the civilized world mourned.

in 1973, Norman Mailer's The Leavenworth Soviet is published in Europe to huge acclaim. Mailer, an American ex-patriat living in Paris, maintained that the repression of capitalist ideas and dissent against the American “Worker's Paradise” were vital for the continuation of the Soviet state, and not just a byproduct of the few repressive Soviet leaders, as the Americans maintained. Mailer was stripped of his citizenship after the book was published.

in 2003, the peace of the reign of Heaven begins on earth, as every person acknowledges Estelle Gerard as their savior. Death is banished; the wages of sin have been paid. For a thousand years, the world will know the glory of Her rule, until She allows the False One to rise back up from the lake of fire for his judgement.


ALTERNATE HISTORIAN'S NOTE, in an effort to find out exactly how many readers we have, Today In Alternate History will be holding an International Visit TIAH Day. Our Atom feed will be turned off for one day, January 3rd, 2006, and we encourage you all to visit our site on that day to read our material. The feed will be turned back on January 4th, so you can return to reading TIAH normally.

We still have our standard offer - everybody who donates $10 or more through our Paypal link will become alternate history entries on the site. When you donate, I will email you asking your preference for a day & timeline; if you don't reply to me, I'll place you in a day that seems to fit your name :) Thanks for your continued support!

The Forum lives again! My esteemed Co-Historian has brought the forum back to life, and in spite of the issues we've had with the forum in the past, we think that this time, it'll stay up!
Fresh New Poll - Shall we use future dates in our entries?

Warp and Protocols still available; also, see the script I submitted for Bravo's Situation: Comedy. Speaking of which, the winning writers have been announced; not the ones I voted for, but you can see the one I did at http://www.marktreitel.com

Help the Alternate Historian get a better day job!
My email address for contacting me with your good news, or for more direct goodness, go to the web site and leave a comment, buy a book, or leave a Paypal donation! Remember, it's only 6 degrees of separation between you and anyone else - and thanks again!

Destiny

Al Gore	In 2009, with an appropriate sense of history the long awaited re-unification talks finally began in Richmond, Virginia. In a powerful opening speach, CS President Al Gore masterfully connected the unfinished business of former President Bush's last State of the Nation address with the 'unfinished work' of Lincoln's Gettysburg address ~ The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced.
CS President

Startled, Hillary Rodham accidentally knocked over a glass of mineral water. Gore remarked that the US President looked like she had seen a ghost. Joked, shall we say, because the Confederate delegation was fully aware that Rodham had seized upon the dissolution as a populist issue to seize the White House. But in fact, the restless ghost of Abraham Lincoln was the primary reason for Rodham's arrival in the Confederate capital. It's well known how Lincoln anguished over the horrors of the Civil War. His spirit may have continued worrying long after his death. Calvin Coolidge's wife reported seeing on several occasions the ghost of Lincoln standing with his hands clasped behind his back, at a window in the Oval Office, staring out in deep contemplation toward the bloody battlefields across the Pototmac. Lincoln's ghost seems to have been most active during the administration of Franklin Roosevelt, perhaps because they were both in power at times of great war for the United States. During their 13-year occupancy of the White House, the Roosevelts used the former Lincoln bedroom as a study for Eleanor, the first lady. Although she never claimed to have seen Lincoln's spirit, Eleanor spoke of the sense of someone watching her as she worked in the room. She believed Lincoln was there with her. ~ Paranormal Phenomena.

.

Wrathful Boy King	In 1923, in an act of impatient curiosity Howard Carter unsealed the burial chamber of Pharaoh Tutankhamun in the Valley of the Kings, Luxor, Egypt. Whilst unwrapping the linens of the mummy the skull of the ancient king fell away from the body causing a dent in the skull. Egyptians believed a king could only be immortal if the body rested undisturbed, and so it proved to be the case as the wrathful boy king rose to kill not only Carter and fellow grave-robbers Lord Carnarvon and Lady Evelyn Herbert but all the British on the Nile.
Tutankhamun

.

In 1000, millenialists capture the Vatican in Rome and assassinate Pope Silvester II. Their leader, Budo de Stella, crowns himself Pope and decrees that all who oppose him oppose Christ; he claims to be the risen savior. Over the next three decades, the Catholic Church is wracked by religious war as the millenialists fight those who consider de Stella the Anti-Christ.

In 2008, US Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice was informed that the Middle East master plan emailed to President Mahmoud Abbas was virus infected. An assistant at State had plugged a personal storage device into his laptop and infected the document pack. Now Mr Abbas was viewing some remastered Baywatch scenes from the mid-eighties.

.

In 1940, the German tanker Altmark is boarded in neutral Norwegian waters by sailors from the British destroyer HMS Cossack, a breach of Norwegian neutrality known as the notorious Altmark Incident at the beginning of World War II. By then the fascist powers of Anglo-America were well set on the path to war and had stopped trying to keep up appearances to the contrary; rather they were agitators, keen to reverse the unbroken series of misadventures that had beset both nations since the Treaty of Versailles.

.

In 1951, the Soviet Union's leader, Joseph Stalin, announces that his country will enter the war in Korea in support of the northern Communists, in an effort to balance what he calls the 'warmongers' of the west. The attack splits the United Nations, crushing the hopes of those who wanted to use the world body as a forum for ending wars, rather than starting them. Soviet troops in North Korea soon overwhelm the meager forces that the UN had in place there, and the United States responds to the escalation by throwing in almost a half-million troops. The war then spills beyond Korea's borders when British troops invade the Chinese mainland, and by 1952, all of east Asia is embroiled in the conflict. China urges the Soviets to use nuclear weapons, but Stalin resists - he wants territory, and feels that irradiated territory is useless to him. Similarly, President Truman of the United States resists calls to 'nuke the commies' from the right-wingers in his own ranks. Although in public he supports his decision to use atomic bombs against the Japanese, in private he has vowed never to use such weapons again. The war drags on for 11 years until the two sides finally realize that neither can win, and declare a truce in 1961. Privately, President Johnson of America and Premier Khrushchev of the Soviet Union promise that the proxy wars between their two countries are over.

.

In 1959, Cuban Prime Minister Miro Cardona has his rival, Fidel Castro, deposed from his position as commander of the armed forces, in an effort to maintain power against the more radical elements in the Cuban revolution. Castro and his supporters temporarily take up arms against Cardona, but was convinced to reconcile with Prime Minister Cardona by his old ally and friend, Ernesto Guevara. Castro entered the Cuban parliament as a representative of his home region, the Oriente province, and became an outspoken check on the moderate wing of the revolution as they pushed democracy forward in Cuba. Prime Minister Cardona stepped down in 1965, and Castro began the first of his 7 campaigns for the office, all losing. He has been quite effective in Parliament, though, pushing universal health care and disaster recovery programs that are the envy of the developing world.

.

In 301, Abu Dja'far Mohammed Djarir al-Tabari, historian of the early days of Islam, is called to the embrace of Allah at the age of 83. His powerful stories of Mohammed and the first faithful are credited with converting most of the pagan lands surrounding the holy land, and giving Islam its first great writer.

.

In 2003, Washington soviet surrenders to the Soviet States of America, leaving Idaho as the sole remaining remnant of the People's Republic of America. In desperation, the soviet's leaders attempt to reconvene the peace talks with Washington, D.C., but they are rebuffed since the S.S.A. feels that victory is imminent.

In 1600, Giordano Bruno was released from the Inquisition's custody after a long discussion with the Pope. Bruno's work flirted with an almost atheistic view of the universe. Pope Clement VIII met with a mysterious end after this meeting, and Bruno fled Europe for the Americas to escape the reach of the Inquisition.

.

In 1985, BBC News reported: Falklands' row civil servant resigns - Ministry of Defence assistant secretary Clive Ponting resigns from his post over the Belgrano affair. In a conscience attack, Ponting had revealed the details of Margaret Thatcher`s 'Bad Spells'.

.

Stephen Donaldson	In 1968, Stephen Reeder Donaldson languished in Vietnam. By inclination a conscientious objector, he had been compelled to serve in the armed forces. Much later, and after dropping out of his Ph.D. program and moving to New Jersey in order to write fiction, Donaldson made his publishing debut with the first 'Covenant' trilogy in 1977. That enabled him to move to a healthier climate. He now lives in New Mexico. Donaldson's two year compulsory military duty would be the deep undercurrent of his escapist fantasy writing. In 'The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant, the Unbeliever', the protagonist was a leper struggled with disempowerment in a Land he did not really believe in.
Languishing

We are the Unhomed - lost voyagers of the world from desert shore to high cliff cragg, home of men and sylvan sea-edge faery lands-, from dream to dream we set our sails, and smiled at the rainbow of our loss ~ 'The Unhomed'.

.

In 1804, Lieutenant Stephen Decatur of the U.S. Navy attempts to convince his superiors that his daring plan to destroy the frigate Philadelphia being held by Tripolitanians will succeed. Although none of them doubt his courage, they do doubt the wisdom of his plan, and order him not to proceed. The Tripolitanians add the Philadelphia to their navy, but it is sunk in an engagement with American ships in 1805.