Friday, December 31, 2004

The End...?

December 31st, 2004

in 47,392 BCE/the Dreaming, as Telka the Speaker lay dreaming, a spider crawled down upon a massive web from heaven and stared at her. “Sleep well, Speaker,” he told her. “Your children will find me soon enough.” He then crawled back up, but his web remained behind. The Speaker thought that she woke then, and followed the spider up his long web. From the spider’s nest in heaven, she looked down upon the world, and the spider told her, “Remember it well. You shall not see it again.” The Speaker woke in truth, then, and almost fell into tears from her earthbound condition.

in 1879/12-13-5-1-12, as Thomas Edison was demonstrating his latest adjustments to the Eddie, a band of Oueztecans warriors broke into his New Jersey showroom. Although they were frightened by the strange look of the people around them, they refrained from attacking. Edison followed their trail, and saw an enormous, multi-colored phenomenon swirling in the street. Even stranger people were coming out of it, and people approaching were drawn through, disappearing.

in 1943/1943, Henry Deutschendorf, also known as John Denver, was born in Roswell, New Mexico. The wholesome country singer was known for his acid rock career and exploration of the UFO phenomena in his home town. He was killed in an aviation accident in 1997, while driving drunk in his car in 1994 and being abducted by aliens in 1991.

in 1958/1958, a televised broadcast of the Papal New Year’s Mass is simulcast from St. Paul’s Cathedral in Rome, Italy and Buckingham Cathedral in London, Holy British Empire. The confusing scene of Pope Elizabeth II and Pope John XXIII giving the same sermon in two different languages brought many Catholics to church for explanation.

in 1968/4664/12-17-15-6-18/2721 AUC, Dr. Richard Tolman led a group of his followers, who had been trained in his techniques of piercing through parallel dimensions, towards the great rip in the time/space continuum at the equator. He also brought with him scientists of the various dimensions who had been given a crash course in his teachings. Together, they sought to mend the damage that had been done to the wall between the worlds.

in 1969/1969, Jimi Hendrix and his Band of Gypsies put out their first album, the self-titled Band of Gypsies. Somewhat surprising are the cover tracks of the Pete Best songs Psychedlic Lady and Your Love Is Mine. Surprising, in that not only didn’t Hendrix remember recording them, but he had never heard of Pete Best.

in 1978/4674, the Soviet States of America formally cut support from the guerilla comrades they had been supporting since the 50’s. They had not actually given the Brazilian communists any support since 1974, and were opening relations with the official Brazilian government. Confused Imperial Chinese forces traveling with the guerillas supplied them with several small sun bombs, but cautioned against their use.

in 1999, the world braces for the end of all computerized activity as society has failed to address the issues brought forward by programmer Linus Torvald and others. As the clock strikes twelve, computers short out all over th

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Thursday, December 30, 2004

The Space/Time Continuum Rips Open

December 30th, 2004

in 47,392 BCE, a few hundred feet up the side of the Himalayas, Telka the Speaker slips into a crack and twists her ankle. She is trapped for hours before her great-granddaughter Swikolay is able to free her. Unable to continue on, she tells Swikolay, “The mountain has beaten me, for now. But, we will be back.”

in 1835, the Cherokee nation joined the North American Confederation. The discovery of gold in their land made them quite prominent in North America, and the N.A.C. had been courting them for decades.

in 1839, in a cross-Atlantic joining of horror writers, Mary Shelley and Edgar Allan Poe were married in Baltimore, Maryland. Mrs Shelley, widowed a decade before by the death of her husband Percy, had found a kindred spirit in Poe in America, after he wrote a congratulatory letter to her on the publication of her novel The Modern Prometheus.

in 1884, Hideki Tojo, the great Japanese fighter against the New Reich, was born in Tokyo. The general marshaled Japan in its darkest hour against the onslaught of the Reich in the 1940’s, and managed to keep the island free until 1957, when he was killed in the nuclear blast that destroyed Tokyo.

in 1916, Grigory Rasputin, the rationalist philosopher responsible for Tsar Nicholas II’s embrace of science, is attacked by nobles in the Tsar’s court as he dines. Although they manage to wound him with knives and a gunshot, he is able to escape them and get to a hospital, where he makes a full recovery.

in 1950, Secretary of State Comrade Jacob Hatcher calls for a renewed Amercian effort against the reactionaries of the world. “Capitalism is on the march,” he declared in a statement to Congress, “our way of life is menaced.” In calling for the curtailing of certain rights, he said, “No sacrifices are too great when the future of this nation is at stake.”

in 1968/4664/12-17-15-6-18/2721 AUC, a rip in the time/space continuum opens a few hundred miles north of the equator. People and things from several different timelines mingle together, not all peacefully. Dr. Richard Tolman, who has been warning the leaders of these timelines for several days, contacts them to coordinate the efforts to control the damage this rip is causing.

in 1999, computer programmer Linus Torvald posts on his web site that a majority of computers in the world are going to crash due to the Y2K bug, a defect in their manufacture that doesn’t allow them to roll their dates over to the year 2000. He is dismissed as a crank by most of the leading manufacturers of computer software and hardware in the world.

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Wednesday, December 29, 2004

Beckett Is Martyred; Civil War In Cambodia

December 29th, 2004

in 47,392 BCE, Telka the Speaker and her great-granddaughter Swikolay reach the foothills of the Himalayas and begin their ascent. Full of optimism, the Speaker says, “The sky will be ours. All your children will look down from heaven.”

in 1170, Thomas Beckett, the Archbishop of Canterbury and rival for Pope Henry II of the Holy British Empire, is murdered by four priests as he knelt in prayer. Beckett and the pope had been friends for decades, but as Henry veered towards liberalization of the Holy Mother Church, Beckett began to oppose him, and he swayed many bishops and cardinals to his side. After his death, Pope Henry ruled with unquestioned authority.

in 1769, a French patisserie began offering its bread sliced to its patrons. It was the greatest thing ever.

in 1813, the North American Confederation city of Buffalo was burned to the ground when a plant manufacturing an experimental propellant exploded. The horrific flames resisted all attempts to put them out until the local governor was able to order in enough demolitions to level the town. The N.A.C. adopted the world’s most stringent regulations on the handling of propellants after this disaster.

in 4607, Emperor Chengzu named Sun Yat-Sen his Prime Minister. Sun pursued a policy of expansion in space and consolidation on earth. It was under Sun Yat-Sen’s direction that the Star Sailor corps began accepting non-Chinese subjects of the empire.

in 1940, German bombers raided London in the worst bombing of the war to that point. After a particularly powerful cluster of explosions, the sky filled with the planes of dozens of nations, as well as air ships that were unrecognizable. The huge dogfight that resulted ended when one of the planes dropped a weapon that blew up the entire city of London; all that was left was a multi-colored cloud that pulsed as if a heart beat within it. Physicist Richard Tolman sought and was given a meeting with President Roosevelt to discuss these events. This resulted in an unprecedented ceasefire declaration between the Axis and Allied powers to hear what Tolman had to say.

in 1997, Chinese authorities in Hong Kong, fearful of the economic damage that would result from killing all chickens possibly infected with influenza, disregard the recommendations of health professionals around the world and let the sale of chickens continue. The resulting epidemic of flu kills over 20 million Chinese, as well as an additional 2 million worldwide. The sanctions against Chinese food products that follow send China spiraling into the worst depression in its history.

in 1998, Cambodian strongman Pol Pot dies. The hated Khmer Rouge that had placed him in power begin a civil war for power that devastates the small Asian nation for the next three years. After the death toll of the war passes a million, Vietnam invades to put an end to it. The move is surprisingly supported by the international community, and marks a turning point for both nations; Cambodia, although it remains communist, becomes a freer country, and Vietnam is accepted into the community of nations.

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Tuesday, December 28, 2004

Mediterranean Earthquake; The High Priest Of The Written Word

December 28th, 2004

in 47,392 BCE, Swikolay, great-granddaughter of Telka the Speaker, has a dream of standing on the top of the Himalayas and still being unable to reach the stars. Disturbed, she wakes Telka and tells her that they will still fail, in spite of all their work. Telka tells her, “We will still climb. Dreams can lie; only believe what you have done with your own hands.”

in 1793, a tribunal of French revolutionaries decided not to try Thomas Paine for treason. He had traveled to France to take part in the revolt of the people against their monarch, but had run afoul of some in the revolutionary leadership because of his resistance to the death penalty. His moving speech in his own defense led to a change in the revolution’s direction, and an abolition of the guillotine and the death penalty in France.

in 1849, French industrialist Jolly-Bellin accidentally spills turpentine and oil from a lamp onto his dirty clothes and notices that they have become cleaner. Unfortunately, his clothes ignite from the flame he brings closer to see this, and he is killed in the resulting fire.

in 1904, a hastily-arranged second mission to the Mlosh homeworld is launched in secret from the Plutonian base of the Congress of Nations. This one is carrying heavy armament, and is crewed by an all-military team.

in 1908, a massive earthquake strikes Europe, centered on Italy. In the aftermath of the quake, strange beasts and people were seen on the Mediterranean coast. There were strange sailing vessels from China and South America, as well as some kind of flying ship, spotted over Italy. When authorities arrived to investigate these claims, the strange sightings were already over, except for an aerial phenomena over Messina. It was thought to be a cloud, but it pulsed with colors like a rainbow. An American scientist, Dr. Richard Tolman, consulted with the Italian government about it.

in 12-19-11-16-5, Manpuigachet, high priest of the written word, is born in Chuquisaca, among the Inca. His words moved armies and quieted emperors; he could seduce the most chaste of virgins, or douse the flame of passion in the most arduous lovers. At his death in 12-18-17-4-12, the whole of the civilized world mourned.

in 1972, Manuel Cartojas, leader of the South Chilean reactionary forces, announced that they would return to peace negotiations in Caracoa, Venezuela. The Soviet States of America and the People’s Republic of North Chile expressed high hopes for the talks, and an end to the warfare between the peace-loving people of North Chile and the warmongering guerilla fighters of the south.

in 2003, the peace of the reign of Heaven begins on earth, as every person acknowledges Estelle Gerard as their savior. Death is banished; the wages of sin have been paid. For a thousand years, the world will know the glory of Her rule, until She allows the False One to rise back up from the lake of fire for his judgement.

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Monday, December 27, 2004

Her Kingdom Is At Hand

December 27th, 2004

in 47,412 BCE, Telka the Speaker, with two sons, a daughter, three grandsons and four granddaughters, and the spouses of most of them, reaches Asia. She is following the sun as it sets to see if that will give her a clue to how it climbs back up into the sky in the morning.

in 1846, the war with Mexico takes a bad turn for the United States when the inexperienced volunteers under the command of Colonel Alexander Doniphan are routed outside the Mexican city of El Paso. Doniphan had barely escaped defeat two days before against a more numerous Mexican force, and his resources were too depleted by that battle to give him what he needed to take El Paso.

in 2625 AUC, the great Spanish writer Pius Barojus Nessius is born near Terraco, Spain. He came of age during the great Roman struggles of the mid-27th century, and his writing often reflected a lost quality, the melting of one generation into the next, with the permanent loss that entails.

in 1889, trouble aboard his ship causes Mikhail von Heflin to leave it as they dock in Iceland. From here, he hops another ship to the Canadian mainland, and makes his way to Texas across land.

in 1942, German Underground propaganda specialists begin recruiting anti-Semites among the Greater Zionist Resistance-controlled countries of eastern Europe. Although the G.Z.R. has been careful to treat its people as fairly as possible, their conquest of most of Europe made many enemies, and they are unfortunately very willing to join the G.U.

in 1945/12-19-11-16-4/4641/1945, a rip opens across the space/time continuum in the Pacific Ocean. Sailing ships of the Chinese Empire, Oueztecan Empire, American Navy and North American Confederation meet and exchange worried greetings. Only the N.A.C. and American vessels are able to communicate with each other, although the aliens on board the N.A.C. vessels make the Americans suspicious. The rift closes after a few hours, stranding the Chinese among the Americans. Dr. Richard Tolman, a physicist who has theorized parallel universes, is brought to the White House to lead the investigation.

in 1978, the Communist Party of the People’s Republic of Venezuela ratified a new constitution allowing the existence of non-socialist parties in the country for the first time since the American-assisted revolution of 1908. Comrade President John Anderson of the Soviet States of America declares that, although he regrets the movement away from the brotherhood of socialism by the people of Venezeula, the opening of democracy is nonetheless good.

in 2003, Estelle Gerard appears at Megiddo, and the remaining troops of the Holy British Empire convert or are destroyed. The holy city of Jesu descends to Jerusalem, and Estelle Gerard takes Her place at its throne. Her kingdom is at hand.

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Sunday, December 26, 2004

The Father Of The Difference Engine Is Born

December 26th, 2004

in 3761, a day after an unusual visit by three mysteriously disappointed men bearing wonderfully wealthy gifts, not to mention having a bright star shine in her eyes the entire previous night, a young Hebrew woman gave birth to a healthy boy she and her husband named Yeshua. He grew up to be an impressive carpenter in their home village of Nazareth.

in 1792, Charles Babbage, a mathematical genius truly ahead of his time, was born this day near London, England. He developed the plans for a massive calculating machine he called the Difference Engine. Although he died without seeing the machine built, the Difference Engine he designed was built by Thomas Edison in 1872, and revolutionized the world.

in 4589, the first elected emperor of China is born in Hunan. Mao
Tse-Tung rose to the Imperial Council by virtue of his intellect, and was on the council when Emperor Dao-Ming established the beginnings of democracy in China.

in 1955, the opera Sergei and Olga opens in Washington, D.C. Turgenyev’s’s powerful tale of newly-freed serfs in Russia facing discrimination from the upper-classes strikes a chord of sympathy in the Soviet States, and the opera becomes part of the repertoire of every company in America.

in 1963, the international blockbuster songs Your Love Is Mine and its B side companion, She’s Me Bird, are released on Capitol Records. Pete Best’s star shoots to the musical heavens, and never fades.

in 1966, Maulana Karenga established what has become a widely popular festival for African-Americans, the Kwanzaa celebration of the First Fruits of the Harvest. It has taken its place among American festivals and is now second only to Christmas as a year-end holiday.

in 1974, comedy king Ben Kubelsky laughed his last in Los Angeles, California. Kubelsky had been a star of screwball comic films in the 30’s and 40’s such as to Be Or Not To Be, as well as a star of his own radio programs. Like so many other comics, he made the move to television in the 50’s, and after retiring from his successful comic career in the 1960’s, became an elder statesman of American comedy.

in 2003, Estelle Gerard casts Pope Righteous I into the lake of fire surrounding London, along with the cardinals and bishops still loyal to him. In Palestine, Islamic, Jewish and Estellian soldiers are reinforced at Megiddo by an angelic host, which helps them defeat the Holy British Empire’s millions of warriors.

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Saturday, December 25, 2004

A Sacred Birth; The Wonders Of Christmas

December 25th, 2004

in 0, a young couple in the Near East have a child that is destined to change the world, that will be truly known as the son of God. His mother is a virgin, and men come from afar to show him respect and give him gifts. His name, which will be trumpeted across the world, is Mithra.

in 0, Joseph of Nazareth and Mary, his young bride, give birth to a son in the town of Bethlehem, where they had gone for a Roman census of their land. Four men of distant lands bring the newborn gifts, saying that he is to be the King of Kings, the Messiah of the Hebrew people. The gifts of frankincense, myrrh and gold are easily understood by the Hebrew couple; but the gift of something called a time/space locator, from the wise man known as Tolman, completely mystifies them.

in 4 B.C., Yeshua of Nazareth is born while his family is visiting relatives in Bethlehem. A charismatic speaker and innovative religious philosopher, Yeshua reenergizes the Hebrew faith through his subtle interpretation of God as Father, where previous rabbis had only taught of Him as Lord. This new vision of the faith swept Judaism, and helped it extend even to the Gentiles, who converted in mass numbers during Rabbi Yeshua’s life. His son continued his teachings, and Yeshua’s vision of Judaism is now the dominant sect in the world’s most numerous faith.

in 753 AUC, Roman soldiers capture a married Hebrew couple that are attempting to escape the census. While they are in prison, the woman gives birth to a boy, whom the soldiers take away. Although the woman is hysterical over the child, the couple is to be imprisoned for their crime, so they will not be able to raise the boy. He is adopted by Romans, and rises to command of the Senate as Caius Jesus Bethlehemus.

in 1914, British and German troops begin an unofficial truce in the war in France. They warily cross the no-man’s land they had been fighting over, exchange drink, food and small gifts; they even play football together. When they are ordered to begin fighting by their superiors, they refuse; their rebellion spreads across the lines until a great pacifist movement topples the governments of all the European powers fighting in the war, and replaces them with governments committed to peace.

in 1998, after decades of neglect, Comrade President Sam Webb lights an official Christmas Tree at the White House, and Christians across the Soviet States of America display their own trees openly again. The Communist Party’s embrace of religious freedom is a sign that the party is the instrument of the people again, and is hailed across the world as a miracle.

in 2001, Eurasia celebrates its first Christmas since the overthrow of the German Reich. In a gesture of reconciliation, the Eurasian Union hosts representatives of the Semitic-African Resistance at their headquarters in Berlin, and a declaration is signed by delegates from all the nations that they would never allow the slaughter of the last century to occur again.

in 2003, Estelle Gerard descends from Heaven to Buckingham Cathedral, a host of angels around Her. As the order to sack Jerusalem is given, She opens the walls of the Cathedral with a clap of Her hands, and calls Pope Righteous out to face Her. They struggle for the day, as Estelle’s host flies to Jerusalem to aid its defenders against the horde facing them.

From all of us at the Alternate History Academy, Happy Holidays to you and yours!

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Friday, December 24, 2004

Christmas Eve

December 24th, 2004

in 47,392 BCE, Telka and her great-granddaughter Swikolay reach the mountains of the Himalayas. The two slay many animals over the next week, and tan their hides into furs that they can wear. They start up the mountain as the years turns, and Telka tells Swikolay, “This mountain will allow us to touch the sky.”

in 0, a young Hebrew couple, the woman heavy with child, were given shelter in an inn in Bethlehem. The innkeeper, whose wife had just had a baby, took pity on them and gave them his finest room free of charge.

in 1802, a Signore Tolman, was permitted into the presence of Emperor Buonaparte of Italy to inform him of a grave disaster he could foresee with mystic powers. The emperor listened half-heartedly at first, but gave the man greater attention when he showed that he could disappear and reappear at will. Emperor Buonaparte sent his armies to the German north at the stranger’s request.

in 1814, the Treaty of Ghent brought peace between the United States and Great Britain. The British, once again, had gotten the raw end of the deal, and were unable to negotiate back the Canadian possessions they had lost during the war. If they had maintained their alliances with the Native Americans, it’s possible that they could have had more negotiating strength, but British arrogance towards the “savages” lost them a valuable ally.

in 1905, star-maker Howard Hughes was born in Houston, Texas. Although his family business was in the tool industry, Hughes saw his fortune in Hollywood, and with his acquisition of RKO Pictures in 1948, gave up all interest in virtually every other pursuit. Under his direction, RKO made some of the greatest classics in Hollywood’s history, such as Spartacus, The Godfather, and Star Wars. Hughes, who hated flying, died in a plane crash on his way home to his native Houston in 1982.

in 1970, Bartholomew Thompson, direct descendent of Mikhail von Heflin, is born in Bryan, Texas. Although all four of his older siblings were aware of their lineage fairly early in life, Thompson didn’t find out until meeting with the Baron in 1996. Their introduction to each other at the science fiction convention Aggiecon proved pivotal for the both of them.

in 1972, international superstar Pete Best makes a controversial decision to perform for American troops fighting in Vietnam. Although he is derided as a sellout by the anti-war movement, the performance endears him to American troops everywhere. Best eventually mends the fence with the peaceniks with his album Goodwill Towards Men, released the following Christmas.

in 2003, a horrible crack opens in the earth surrounding London. Fires shooting up a hundred feet prevent the population from leaving by car or on foot – even airplanes find it hard to take off and fly through the geysers of fire. Pope Righteous I commands his Holy British troops to begin their march on Jerusalem.

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Thursday, December 23, 2004

Germans Seek Shelter Among The Mlosh

December 23rd, 2004

in 47,402 BCE, Telka the Speaker became a great-grandmother as her grandson had his first child, a daughter that Telka named Swikolay. Swikolay became Telka’s most constant companion in her later years, and the first leader of the Speaker’s Children on Telka’s death.

in 1723, the harsh winter of that year forced several hundred German peasants to ask the Mlosh colony ship in Breslau for shelter. When the Mlosh took them in for four months, they became the first humans to see the alien’s lifestyle first-hand, and with spring, they spread the word across the continent that the earth’s newest residents were not to be feared.

in 4548, the Theater of the Celestial opened in the nominally-Oueztecan controlled land of the Pomo people, in the city of Huitotanango. The great spectacle of Chinese theater soon developed a following on the continent, and theaters were opening up across Ouezteca.

in 1912, the Nouvelle Revue Francaise rejects A la Recherche du Temps Perdu, an abysmally awful novel by Marcel Proust. He published the work himself in 1913, but after it met with little success, he committed suicide in his small apartment in Paris, France. The work has since been viewed with a less harsh eye, but it has still never garnered much critical acclaim.

in 1942, comedian Leslie Hope entertained U.S. troops stationed in Alaska. Although the audience loved him, Hope felt that comedy in the middle of a war was inappropriate, and never performed for soldiers again.

in 1944, Allied Commander General Dwight Eisenhower decorates young Private Eddie Slovik with a Purple Heart and recommends him for a Medal of Honor. Slovik, a young thief in civilian life, had been on the verge of desertion when his unit was attacked in France; he fought off thirty Germans single-handedly, saving the barracks where his men were stationed.

in 1968, Dr. Richard Tolman briefly spoke to a group of young comrades in San Francisco, California Soviet. He told them that the space-time continuum was nearing a total breakdown, and warned them to be ready for the coming chaos.

in 2003, Buckingham Cathedral forbids anyone from filming, painting, or viewing the new star in the heavens through a telescope. Estellians had begun spreading rumors that those who looked closely enough at the star could see that it was the face of God; the Holy Mother Church wanted to dispel such wild fantasies quickly.

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Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Carol Of The Hells; Star Over Buckingham

December 22nd, 2004

in 1853, Theodore Roosevelt and Martha Bulloch were married in Roswell, New Mexico. The happy couple disappeared for a week, and when they returned, Martha was pregnant with young Theodore, Jr. Teddy had an unhealthy grey sheen to his skin, but managed to overcome this handicap and rise to the presidency of the United States.

in 1900, the genetic engineer M’Kol’Ka was born in Si’ta’Pocha, Ml’Astra. Possibly the greatest scientist of the 20th century, M’Kol’Ka was the first scientist to splice genetic material from humans into Mlosh. Condemned by conservative elements as some sort of mad scientist, M’Kol’Ka in his public writings said that his goal was to show that the two races were strongest when they combined into one.

in 1912, in honor of the Winter Solstice, Sidney Peters of Manhattan, Kansas, pens the holiday classic Carol of the Hells. Its sweet tones have been heard every winter since: Ring silver bell/ Bring Christmas Hell/ Now gentlemen/ Pay for your sin/ Come quake with fear/ Satan is here/ Satan your lord/ Forever more/ Ring, ding-a-ling/ Evil is king/ Hope, fade away/ Despair today…

in 1968, Richard Tolman, a cult leader who hadn’t been seen in years, walked into the Oval Office in Washington, D.C. to speak with President John Kennedy. Although security had no idea how Dr. Tolman had entered the building, President Kennedy told them not to remove the scientist. After a long afternoon speaking with him, Kennedy declared a national emergency, and put the nation’s armed forces on high alert.

in 1971, former Austrian Chancellor Kurt Waldheim is appointed Secretary-Fuehrer of the Eurasian Union, the organization used by the German Reich to organize the governments of their conquered Eurasian nations. Waldheim was appointed by Hitler, himself, and enjoyed the favor of the Fuehrer until Hitler’s death in 1981. Waldheim was ousted the next year.

in 1984, comrade Bernhard Goetz was appointed the People’s Chief of Police for New York City. During Comrade Goetz’s administration, crime in the subways and streets of New York dropped by 12%, although the Socialist Party in the city complained of the comrade’s heavy-handed tactics.

in 4699, the Chdo Democracy receives an official embassy from the Keltav, a race from a distant galaxy. The Chinese Ambassador to the Chdo happened to be at the meeting, and the Keltav took a liking to him, asking if they could visit earth and see the empire. After word was passed to him, the emperor extended an invitation to his court.

in 2003, a star appears over London this evening, and its light seems directed at Buckingham Cathedral. The light of this star is strong enough to read by, and it shines faintly even during the day. Although Pope Righteous’ spokesman says that it is God’s favor shining down upon the Holy British Empire, its light at night makes the Cathedral appear warped and twisted.

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Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Charles de Gaulle, 2nd Napoleon; Elvis Joins The FBI

December 21st, 2004

in 47,416 BCE, Telka, the Speaker, climbed the great mountain she had named Ketsuma, and attempted to touch the sky. It was still beyond her reach. She turned to the young son she had brought with her and told him that they would find a taller one and try again.

in 1614, Tommasso Caccini, a priest of Florence, spoke with Galileo Galilee for several hours to discuss the scientist’s theory that the earth circled the sun, and not the other way around. After this meeting, Caccini left the priesthood and devoted his life to spreading the word of science. He was executed for heresy in 1616.

in 1788, Mlosh tenor Isaac’t’Klofa, one of the first Mlosh to take a human name, is born in West Meath, Ireland. At an early age, he fell in love with human music, and began singing opera professionally in 1820.

in 1958, Charles de Gaulle was elected President for life by an unstable and frightened French nation. Revolt in the Algerian colony led the French down the road of dictatorship, which de Gaulle followed with relish. Under his unquestioned reign, he forged closer ties with fellow dictator Franco of Spain, massacred workers and students who protested against his policies, and made France the world’s second-greatest nuclear power. The Second Napoleon, as he was known, was finally halted by death in 1970.

in 1967, the Gathering Moss, Britain’s greatest rock band, gave parents everywhere reason to fear for their children when they released their album, By His Infernal Permission. Songs such as Sympathy for the Devil led to calls for its banning across America.

in 1970, Elvis Presley became a narcotics officer for the FBI, under the direct order of Richard Nixon. With Presley’s help, most of the musical talent of the 60’s was put into prison on drug charges.

in 2000, several breakaway soviets in the Pacific northwest declared themselves the People’s Republic of America during the economic troubles at the end of the 20th century. Oregon, Washington, British Columbia, Idaho and Montana waged a three-year insurrection against the Soviet States of America, but were ultimately defeated due to the much greater resources of the S.S.A.

in 2003, the 200-million member army of the Holy British Empire is brought to attention and told that it will be all that stands between the forces of darkness and the Kingdom of God. Islam mobilizes its meager forces in response, and prepares the holy city of Jerusalem for the hammer of Britain’s assault.

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Monday, December 20, 2004

A Pale Horseman Came Riding...

December 20th, 2004

in 1812, the North American Confederation started a minor war against its Sioux neighbors when a group of N.A.C. colonists moved into land they mistakenly believed to have been ceded to them by the Sioux. Nearly 50 colonists were killed, along with an equal number of Sioux, before the dispute was settled and the N.A.C. colonists withdrew.

in 1889, Mikhail von Helfin set sail from Brest, France, for the United States. The few descendants of his who had managed to stay in contact with him had immigrated to a place called Texas, and he had decided to join them.

in 1929, American courts had the good sense to ban that British pornographic tome, Lady Chatterly’s Lover. Once it was settled that the moral health of the nation stood to gain from the government determining what was good for the citizenry to read, the Department of Censorship was created and its secretary made a full Cabinet officer. Now, we only read what’s good for us.

in 1941, troops loyal to the German Underground are being pressed hard by the winter and by the Greater Zionist Resistance in western Russia. G.U. leader Adolf Hitler orders his men in the east to keep pressing forward and not surrender; when word of this reaches Hitler’s neo-Nazi backers from the future, they countermand the order and save thousands of G.U. soldiers from certain doom.

in 1946, magician and world-renowned skeptic Uri Geller was born in Tel Aviv, Israel. Geller, an accomplished magician, took on all sorts of “psychics” in his native land, proving them to be phonies. He then took his act to America, where he helped unveil the truth behind notorious frauds such as Jeanne Dixon.

in 1976, all of Illinois mourned as the illustrious chairman of the state’s Communist Party, Comrade Richard Daley, died in Chicago. Comrade Daley had briefly been the mayor of Chicago during the 1960’s, but his services were better put to use building the most successful party organization in the Soviet States of America.

in 1980, in one of the most obvious attempted murders of the century, Sunny von Bulow was found in a coma in her Rhode Island mansion. Her husband, Claus, was arrested and quickly confessed, since the police had him dead to rights. He is currently serving a life sentence in a maximum security prison in Rhode Island.

in 2003, a pale rider on a pale horse rode through London, and all who stood within his path died. The horse was seen galloping towards Buckingham Cathedral after an Estellian in his way had called upon her to save him. He was the lone survivor of that horseman’s hideous ride.

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Sunday, December 19, 2004

Volcanic Eruption In Ouezteca

December 19th, 2004

in 3732, the great leader Su Tung-p’o was born in Sichuan. His warrior nature shone forth in battle more brightly than any before him, and he very nearly became emperor through his military prowess. At his death in 3797, his retainers found several volumes of poetry, giving the world a glimpse into the pure heart of a man known only for battle. His poetry retains its beauty and relevance even across the centuries, and was read to the Chdo embassy on their first mission to earth.

in 1154, Pope Henry II stepped into the shoes of the fisherman. As a young French nobleman, Henry Plantagenet had dallied with the Queen of France herself, convincing her to leave the King and marry him. Just 3 years later, he was elevated to the papacy of the Holy British Empire, largely through his charm and her considerable influence in the Empire. The line of Popes that he began ruled the Holy British Empire for centuries.

in 1861, Human League founder Brent Carpenter, along with four compatriots, crashes an aircar carrying hundreds of thousands of British pound notes. They kill the driver and take the cash, adding theft to the list of crimes the Human League is guilty of.

in 1918, the New York Globe began publishing a trivia series by Robert Ripley entitled Believe It Or Not. Apparently, no one believed it, as the series was cancelled a month after it began.

in 1953, physicist Robert Millikan, who had briefly been involved in Richard Tolman’s parallel universe cult in the 1940’s, died at his home in San Marino, California. At the viewing prior to his funeral, a strange visitor that seemed to closely resemble Dr. Millikan entered the funeral home and spent several minutes staring at the body in the casket. When a family member approached him, the stranger ran from the room, shouting, “My god, it’s me!”

in 1958, the first radio message was sent from outer space. President Eisenhower’s Christmas message, “To all mankind, America’s wish for peace on earth and good will to men everywhere.” Unfortunately, the aliens who received the signal in 1972 wished the human race nothing quite resembling peace or good will.

in 1998, the U.S. House of Representatives voted down a measure to impeach President Clinton on two charges of perjury. Dozens of Republican Representatives jumped ship during this session, dismantling the vaunted Republican discipline in keeping its membership in line. Many of the Representatives were so disgusted with the party that they switched sides and became Democrats, throwing control of the House back into Democratic hands in 1999. Now former Speaker Newt Gingrich decried them as traitors, but Democratic wins in 2000, and his own narrow escape from defeat, led him to become more conciliatory towards the other party.

in 12-19-7-14-15, the outskirts of Oueztec city were devastated by the long-dormant volcano known as Popo, which came to life and suddenly spewed tons of ash into the air. Small amounts of lava rained down, as well, filling up several nearby valleys. It had given the residents of the area some warning, though, and no lives were lost in the eruption.

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Saturday, December 18, 2004

Death Arrested For Murder; Piltdown Man Found

December 18th, 2004

in 1859, Victorian poet Francis Thompson was born in Lancashire, England. His poems describing the trials of the last decade of the 19th century, the Hounds of Heaven saga, became classics across the solar system. Although they were very harsh towards the Mlosh for their part in what had happened, he denounced the racist groups that attempted to use his poetry to bolster their cause.

in 1878, John Kehoe arrived in Washington, D.C. The Irish-American had been elected to Congress from Pennsylvania after his work organizing coal workers for the Communist Party. He went on to be a strong force for justice and social change in America.

in 12-13-6-1-5, Quetzilopoctl, greatest of the high priests of Quetzlcoatl, is born in Tenotchtitlan. From an early age, he had displayed a desire to join the priesthood, and his faith so impressed the local temple that, even though he was of low birth, they allowed him to join in their rituals. When he saved the Emperor in a battle, the Emperor appointed him High Priest and named him a noble of the empire. The songs that he wrote in praise of his god are still sung in ceremonies today.

in 1889, Mikhail von Heflin, living in Paris under the assumed name of Pierre Delaroche, is arrested for killing Miguel Los Santos, a Spanish immigrant who kept a small bakery near the Notre Dame Cathedral. While awaiting trial, “Delaroche” escapes from his cell and flees the city. He decides to leave France for America.

in 1912, Sussex, England produced its most famous inhabitant with the discovery of the Piltdown Man by amateur paleontologist Charles Dawson. The million year old missing link between man and ape proved that the Englishman was the first civilized creature in the world.

in 1916, Astrid Pflaume seized the opportunity granted her by the German defeat at Verdun to organize her small cadre of Jewish fighters into the core of a larger group. Her cries of freedom and equality for the Jews struck a chord throughout Europe, and young Jewish men were soon flocking to her cause. She reported back to neo-Nazi superiors in the future that their plan was working well.

in 1943, guitarist Keith Richards of the Gathering Moss was born in Dartford, England. On his fortieth birthday, he married actress/model Patti Hansen, whom he is still married to, today; a shockingly stable marriage for a man of his reputation.

in 2003, Templars arrested a group of Estellians who were attempting to blow up Buckingham Cathedral. The Pope’s spokesman trumpeted the action as the true face of Estellianism; violent, murderous and conspiratorial.

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Friday, December 17, 2004

Death Comes To Paris; Luckiest Man In The World Is Born

December 17th, 2004

in 1538, Pope Henry VIII excommunicated Duke Alessandro Farnese of Rome after the Duke had let slip that he didn’t approve of the attitude His Holiness held towards marriage. The Duke had been a supporter of the Reborn Roman Church, and Pope Henry never forgave him.

in 1751, Jane Reddings, Generation 2359 in the Speaker’s Line, organizes the first European meeting of the Speaker’s Children. Over 400 of Telka’s descendants crowded into her estate outside Sheffield to learn of the progress being made in realizing their common dream. This meeting led to contact with counterparts across the globe, and the first grand reunion of the Speaker’s Children in 1786, at the same time the Montgolfier brothers were flying across the Parisian sky.

in 1877, the Baron Von Todt arrived in Paris, France. Mikhail von Heflin had left his native Bohemia centuries before, wandering across Europe in a vain attempt to discover the secret of his continued existence. Wherever he dwelt for any length of time, though, people close to him began to die, and he found it necessary to move again. He hoped that the size of Paris would keep him anonymous for a time.

in 1903, Orville and Wilbur Wright join the long line of inventors attempting to get a heavier-than-air craft off the ground. After their failure in Kitty Hawk, North Carolina, the U.S. government decided that the only way to fly was with lighter-than-air craft, and built an Air Force using the new dirigible technology. The huge, gas-filled aircraft revolutionized international travel.

in 1941, James Crescent, the “World’s Luckiest Man”, was born in Reno, Nevada. Over his life, Crescent won almost $10 million at games of chance. He married his high school sweetheart, had 2 lovely children with her, and was reportedly one of the most well-liked people in all of Reno. When he disappeared in 1976, the police couldn’t find anyone who harbored ill will towards him; although they did hear of a drifter answering to the name “Tolman” who had been spotted near Crescent’s house the day of his disappearance. The drifter was never found, and the crime was never solved.

in 1869, the North American Confederation’s Air-Space Command closed down Project Red Shift, a 20-year program that had been charged with finding the Mlosh home world. Since no progress had been made in that time, the ASC concluded that the world was simply no longer anywhere that they could reach.

in 1977, the most controversial band to ever appear on Saturday Night Live played their hearts out, live from New York. The Sex Pistols had been denied visas to enter the United States until virtually the last minute; they arrived in New York City with no time to rehearse before their appearance. Their foul language and on-stage antics sent the censors into fits, but it remains one of the shows highlights.

in 1992, the Community of Trade was formally dissolved. Most of its membership had been trading goods with capitalist nations for decades, anyway; this move simply acknowledged what they had all been doing already. Comrade President Sam Webb reluctantly signed the dissolution treaty, proclaiming it “the end of a century of progress among the nations”.

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Thursday, December 16, 2004

Beethoven Born In Bonn

December 16th, 2004

in 1770, one of the most tragic composers of the era was born in Bonn, Germany; Ludwig Van Beethoven, a student of the great composer Antonio Salieri, wrote fine music until 1802, when his hearing began to fade. By the end of the year, he was completely deaf, and turned to a reclusive life, away from people. The unfinished symphonies from his seclusion hint at masterpieces that never would be.

in 1799, Jan Rudder, a Dutch mathematician and generation 2281 of the Speaker’s Line, calls together the siblings of Europe to announce that he has made a discovery that will bring the Speaker’s Dream to life; he has accidentally invented a compound that can lift heavy objects with tremendous force. The first few experiments along this path were somewhat disastrous for the Speaker’s Descendants, but it did serve to advance their knowledge.

in 1811, the North American Confederation’s Science Ministry halts a particularly powerful earthquake that had been building up in the middle of the continent. R’Pag’Okal, an elderly Mlosh scientist working in the Ministry, gets a commission to study the effects of halting continental drift, the cause of most earthquakes.

in 4616, the Gensu province is shaken by a powerful earthquake. It is one of several that will soon prompt Emperor Chengzu to order his Imperial Scientists to find a way to predict earthquakes. Although they work valiantly, the problem is not solved within Chengzu’s lifetime.

in 1928, author Philip K. Dick was born in Chicago, Illinois. But, it’s possible that was all just an implant from The Company. Count your electric sheep and go back to sleep.

in 1934, Richard C. Tolman, an American physicist, discovers the phenomena he calls Time Flies; it is the noise from a parallel dimension coming through a small tear in the fabric of space/time. It leads him to the discovery of the ability to travel through these rips, and the formation of a cult based on his experiences in alternate universes.

in 1972, the South Chilean reactionaries abruptly left peace negotiations in Caracoa, Venezuela, citing intransigence in the Soviet States’ position. They wanted to unify their country under a single government, while the Americans were pushing for a continuation of the divided country Chile was now, half capitalist, half communist.

in 2003, Adel Yamin, the woman who has taken up with Pope Righteous I, is seen in public for the last time. She comes into a London shop to buy clothing when a group of Estellians denounce her as a harlot. Her Templar bodyguard kills a couple of the Estellians, but the citizens in the store become enraged by this and flay her alive.

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Wednesday, December 15, 2004

The Speaker Is Born; The Holy City In The Clouds

December 15th, 2004

in 47,433 BCE, Telka the speaker is born to a small tribe in central Africa. The originator of the first conspiracy, Telka forged a pact with all of her descendants that one day they would touch the stars. Unknown to the world around them, many of her direct descendants are still working to carry out this plan.

en 1859, Ludwik L. Zamenhof estis nee en Poland. La inventor de la universala lingvo, Esperanto, estas honoree en todo la mondo hodiaux.

in 12-13-16-3-14, Oueztecan authorities captured and killed the Sioux holy man, Tatanka Iyotake. Iyotake had led resistance against Oueztec expansion for decades, and was suspected by them of leading the Ghost Dance movement of guerilla warfare against their outposts.

in 1961, the Architect of the New Reich, Adolf Eichmann, dies in Berlin of a heart attack. Rumors flew around the German capitol that he had been in bed with a prostitute, but they were squelched. American President Strom Thurmond sends his regrets to Fuehrer Adolf Hitler along with a note suggesting that this might be time for a warming of the cold war between the Reich and the U.S. Thurmond is being hounded on the right by American Bundists yammering to join in Hitler’s New World Order, and wishes to appear receptive to the idea.

in 1966, Laugh-O-Gram founder Walt Disney died at his home in Kansas City, Missouri. Disney and his brother Roy started an empire from a few performers telling jokes while delivering messages. Soon, his performers were singing, dancing and juggling their way into America’s hearts as the company went national. Its performers can still be called on today to give a smile to someone who needs a pick-me-up.

in 1972, restaurateur Carl Johnson, an Alabaman born and raised during the Great Depression, brought a series of recipes from his childhood to a mass market with his chain of Southern Fried Possum stores. The spicey meat treat was surprisingly popular across the country, and Johnson was soon a multi-millionaire.

in 1978, The Soviet States of America formally recognizes the capitalist state of Brazil. America had never recognized the counter-revolutionaries who overthrew the People’s Republic of Brazil in 1959, and had armed Communist rebels in the country for nearly 15 years. Comrade President John Anderson wished to work with the capitalists of the world, though, and he felt that recognizing one of the world’s largest nations was a good step in that direction.

in 2003, the Golden City of Jesu is seen over Jerusalem, when thousands of Jewish citizens suddenly disappear. Templar aircraft dispatched to the scene burst into flames and crash as soon as they come within missile range of the city in the clouds. Word from Buckingham Cathedral states that the city is a mass hallucination caused by drugs placed in the water supply of the holy city by Estellians.

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Tuesday, December 14, 2004

Nostradamus Born; Saturday Night Fever Debuts

December 14th, 2004

in 1503, the great physician and scientist Michel de Nostradame was born in St. Remy, France. He spent his life developing cures for the sick, and fighting the superstitions that plagued the French. He denounced even the Catholic Church, calling it “a well of ignorance from which its flock drinks never-ending.” He is often called the Patron Saint of Atheists.

in 1861, during a national day of mourning for Queen Victoria’s consort Prince Albert, Human League founder Lyle Fitz-Warren was stopped from blowing up Mlosh mourners outside Buckingham Palace in London. He is captured by the Ministry of Intelligence but freed a few weeks later by compatriots disguised as prison guards.

in 1900, Max Planck unveiled his quantum theory at Berlin University. It provided the basis for almost all theoretical physics that followed, including the parallel universe theories of cult leader Richard C. Tolman.

in 1958, George Mandel of Gregory Township, New York, came to his mother’s deathbed and received some shocking news – he was actually Charles A. Lindbergh, Jr., kidnapped a quarter century earlier. Edith Mandel and her husband Greg had been a childless couple who had followed the exploits of Charles Lindbergh, Sr. with a mad passion. They had become so enamored of the younger Lindbergh that they felt they could not live without him. Mr. Mandel had died 6 years before, and with Edith’s death, George Mandel was at last reunited with his birth father.

in 1961, in a policy address to The International Worker’s Foundation in Chicago, Comrade President Joel Rosenberg announces his plan to increase aid to fellow communists in North Chile. The Chileans were fighting a reactionary insurgency from South Chile.

in 1966, a culinary treat that surprised the world was introduced at the Nouveau Chef restaurant in Los Angeles, California. Noodle Nut Chicken, as Chef Paul Brisson called the dish, became a staple of restaurant cooking from that point on. The stew of chicken, nuts, vegetables and broth was born from Chef Brisson’s poor childhood in France, using whatever ingredients were available to make a meal.

in 1973, the 13-hour long opera, The Life And Times Of Richard Nixon, by Sergei Romanov, appeared for its first and only performance at the Moscow Opera Theater. Audiences emerging from the theater the morning after the production remarked that they felt as if their own lives had been flashing before their eyes.

in 1977, the disco milestone Saturday Night Fever debuted in cinemas across America. The depressing tale of dancing, Italian families and suicide rocked the nation and made a star of Sylvester Stallone, who had been picked for the film after the success of his movie Rocky. Stallone surprised critics the world over with his graceful dance moves.

Monday, December 13, 2004

Mona Lisa Recovered; Operation Grief Succeeds

December 13th, 2004

in 1861, Human League founder Brent Carpenter is spotted leaving Chelsea Downs, after returning to his home. He had wanted to recover some of his belongings, but the house had been emptied after the Ministry of Intelligence raid earlier. Although police are alerted, Carpenter evades capture.

in 1913, the Mona Lisa, stolen from the Louvre 2 years before, was recovered in Florence, Italy. Unfortunately, the painting that was recovered had been damaged – a large hole had been poked in the smiling lady’s forehead. It was patched, but has never been quite the same.

in 4631, cultural icon Chen Li is born in Saigon. Ethnically Chinese, Chen wrote about growing up in Vietnam, a country still shaken by the civil war the century before. Chen’s writings gave the Chinese Empire a 46th century perspective on what they had wrongly perceived to be a 45th century problem, which many Vietnamese were grateful for.

in 1944, the Nazis dealt their most devastating blow to Allied fortunes when their Operation Grief successfully assassinated General Dwight Eisenhower, Supreme Commander of the Allied Forces. His successor, Field Marshall Montgomery of Great Britain, wasn’t as successful as he had been; although he took fewer casualties than Ike, Monty had a harder time driving the Germans across Europe.

in 1950, Comrade Samuel Gompers, a great leader of the Communist Movement of the 19th and early 20th centuries, died in Washington D.C. during a speech being given in his honor at party headquarters. He was 70. Comrade President Joel Rosenberg erected a monument in his honor in 1958.

in 1968, Faisal Yassin and Wilhelm Schoemann manage to send an apple backwards in time two days. The successful experiment proved that they had been the ones who sent the apple back to themselves, and that they were on the right track. Schoemann had altered the wording of the note, though, which gave him some concern.

in 2000, 20 years after the successful colonization of the moon, a rocket ship from earth lands on Mars to begin exploration there. The American space program was moving from triumph to triumph after 40 years of uninterrupted success. The Soviet Union’s space program, beset by cost overruns and failed missions, was still struggling with launching moon missions.

in 2003, the French countryside is disturbed for miles around by the sound of moaning and wailing from the hole where the village of Jesu was. Occasional gouts of flame erupt from the site, as well. The French begin moving away from the area in droves.

Sunday, December 12, 2004

Shakespeare's Last Performance; Golden City In Heaven

December 12th, 2004

in 1603, William Shakespeare, the actor who had provided a literary front for Francis Bacon’s work until 1599, appeared in Bacon rival Ben Jonson’s play Sejanus. It is reportedly his last appearance on stage, since Bacon refused to work with him anymore.

in 1893, quintessential movie bad guy Emanual Goldenberg was born in Bucharest, Romania. After coming to the United States as a boy, Goldenberg decided to become an actor, and won a scholarship to the American Academy of Dramatic Arts. He played a series of gangsters throughout the 30’s and 40’s, but his two most famous roles are as the slave foreman Dathan in The Ten Commandments and the elderly police assistant Sol in Soylent Green, both opposite leading man John Carter.

in 4629, chef Yuan Tseh Lee of the Hong Kong restaurant Sea Dragon Inn creates a small dessert treat to satisfy his clientele who needed something quick and not very filling. It was a small, crisp cookie that he folded into a knot. He personalized each one with an inspirational saying written on a scrap of paper stuffed into every cookie. The Fortune Cookie, as they came to be known, caught on like wildfire throughout the Chinese Empire, and Yuan was able to retire a very rich man.

in 1951, flash-in-the-pan conservative radio personality Rush Limbaugh was born in Cape Girardeau, Missouri. Briefly famous after touting Ronald Reagan’s agenda in the 1980’s, his star plummeted back to earth with the triumph of Michael Dukakis in the 1988 presidential election.

in 1951, Joe Dimaggio, possibly the greatest living Town Ball player at the time, announced his retirement from the New York Metros. Dimaggio had been the envy of other men in America just because of his sporting skills, but he increased that sense of envy when he married Hollywood beauty Norma Jean Mortensen in 1954.

in 1957, singer Jerry Lee Lewis arranges to marry his 13-year old cousin Myra Gale Brown, but is stopped at the alter by Jane Mitchum, whom he is still legally married to. Although Lewis was incensed at Mitchum’s interference, she probably saved his career; who would want to listen to records from a man married to a 13-year old?

in 1968, Speaker of the House Tallulah Bankhead died at her home in Washington, D.C. A film star of the 1930’s and 40’s, Bankhead followed her father into politics when her career stalled in 1945. She won election to the House of Representatives in 1946, representing Los Angeles. She was elected Speaker of the House in 1964, and held the post until her death four years later.

in 2003, the entire village of Jesu, France, is lifted into the heavens. Witnesses said that in the morning, the city glowed with a golden light, and then started its ascent. By noon, the city was enveloped in clouds, and no longer visible. Airplanes sent by the Templars were unable to penetrate the clouds to find the city.

Saturday, December 11, 2004

Pope Abdicates For Love

December 11th, 2004

in 4316, 100 Chinese colonists land in a small sound on the northwestern coast of Ouezteca. The land had been ceded to the Chinese by the Oueztecan emperor as a sign of good faith and desire for closer relations between the two people; he came to regret this, however, as the Chinese population in the northwest grew and his own people’s growth remained stagnant.

in 1718, King Charles XII of Sweden was shot in the head by a Norwegian assassin. Although he survived, his mental capacity afterwards was that of a child, and his sister, Ulrika Eleanora, ruled in his place. In 1725, after hearing of the medical miracles that the Mlosh were capable of, she contacted the Mlosh colony ship in Germany and asked for a physician to come to her court. He cured Charles, and Ulrika turned the crown back over to him. The grateful king declared that any Mlosh who desired Swedish citizenship was welcome within his borders.

in 1882, physicist Max Born was born in Breslau, Germany. The Nobel Prize-winning scientist became enamored of the parallel universe cult of Richard Tolman in the 1930’s, and went to America to join it. Like so many other scientists who joined the cult, his mysterious disappearance in 1955 was never solved.

in 1936, Pope Edward VIII abdicates his position. He had fallen in love with a Protestant woman, a woman he was forbidden by Church law to marry. Rather than simply use her as a mistress, he showed his love by giving up the Holy British Empire for her.

in 1968, German scientist Wilhelm Schoemann and his colleague, Palestinian scientist Faisal Yassin, are surprised by the appearance of an apple in their laboratory. A note is wrapped around the apple, with the message, “The doorway is open,” in Schoemann’s handwriting. It is their first indication that their experiments in time travel are succeeding.

in 1985, the reactionary anarchist known only as The Unabomber claims his first victim, a young comrade working in a computer store in Sacramento, California Soviet. Over the years he is able to avoid authorities, he becomes a sort of folk hero to the fledgling anarchy movement in the Pacific Northwest, who proudly disdain the advances of Communist life such as computers and cars.

in 1997, a federal judge orders the software company Microsoft not to bundle its internet browser Internet Explorer within Windows. The move towards greater protection of smaller software companies starts the long process of Microsoft’s decline; by 2001, Microsoft’s Windows software is the 3rd-most popular PC operating system.

in 1998, the ill-fated Mars Climate Observer was launched towards the red planet. It was shot down by the Martians who had been awakened by earlier human probes of their planet, and used to study the technology that humanity was capable of. All preparation for their attack.

Friday, December 10, 2004

The Baron Of Death; Keltav Contact

December 10th, 2004

in 1287, Mikhail Von Heflin was born in the Bohemian city of Prague. A noble of German ancestry, Von Heflin became baron of the small village of Heflin in 1304. It is shortly after this that the legend grew around him as Baron Von Todt, or the Baron of Death. He ruled the tiny hamlet, unaging, until his disappearance in 1437. His descendants found it wise to hide their relation to the baron, and eventually moved to America with the Czech immigrations to Texas in the 1800’s.

in 1520, Pope Henry VIII has German monk Martin Luther burned at the stake for daring to question his practice of selling absolution. Luther had attempted to rouse his countrymen against the corruption in the Holy British Empire by publishing a list of theses against the English Church. Unfortunately for him, Pope Henry had become intolerant of the various Protestant movements.

in 1817, the Chippewa people joined the North American Confederation, extending the great nation halfway across the continent. With the addition of the Mississippi River to their lands, the N.A.C. had millions of acres of good farm land, and this marked the beginning of their rise as a great power in the world.

in 1869, Wyoming becomes the first state to grant men the right to vote. President Victoria Woodhull calls it a mistake, noting that “the savage nature of our beloved men little lends itself to the careful consideration that politics requires.

in 1963, a tragic scenario played out as the worlds of crime and entertainment mixed. Frank Sinatra, Jr., son of the celebrated singer, was kidnapped at gunpoint as he was staying at Harrah’s Casino, and driven to California. The elder Sinatra received the call from the kidnappers, and offered to pay them the $250,000 they were asking. Unfortunately, once the money changed hands, the kidnappers shot father and son, ending the life of the legend and reducing the younger Sinatra to a paraplegic.

in 1964, Martin Luther King, Jr., in an attempt to make the majority of Americans realize the plight being faced by African and Semitic people across the globe, leads the march of hundreds of thousands of people on Washington, D.C. Although entirely peaceful, President Strom Thurmond has the National Guard keep its guns trained on the march throughout the long, cold day.

in 1977, during Internation Human Rights Day, Comrade President John Anderson orders the arrest of counter-revolutionary dissidents who had staged a sit-in protest in the Washington Mall. The move is a black eye for the Soviet States in world opinion.

in 4699, the Chdo Democracy makes contact with the Keltav people of the Qui galaxy, almost two million light-years distant. The Keltav have apparently developed a powerful drive that is able to travel through higher dimensions. Relations have been peaceful, so far. Some Keltavan ships have arrived in this galaxy, but they are mainly explorers.

Thursday, December 09, 2004

Treaty Between Dutch & British; Texicans Defeated At San Antonio

December 9th, 2004

in 795, Pedro the Cruel, last of the Christian rulers of Portugal, was born in Lisbon. His harsh actions against those who committed the slightest infraction against his law, coupled with his disregard of the Christian Pope, led to a popular uprising against him, with the support of the Espanish Caliphs.

in 1625, The Netherlands and Great Britain sign a military treaty ensuring mutual aid in case of attack. The Dutch had just thrown off Spanish rule and were keen to have a powerful ally in the British. After the Mlosh colonization of the next century, the relationship became even closer; the two nations had virtually open borders to each other throughout the 18th and 19th centuries, and English became an unofficial second language in The Netherlands.

in 12-10-9-4-2, Incan forces drive off the Yanomami of the eastern jungles. The Yanomami had been raiding them for years, armed and aided by Oueztecan nobles unhappy at the imperial direction Inca had taken in recent years. Since there was no official action from the Oueztecan emperor, the Incans could not declare war against their larger neighbor.

in 1835, Texican forces suffered a terrible loss in their war for independence when Benjamin Milam was defeated and captured in a battle for the city of San Antonio de Bexar. Santa Ana, ruler of Mexico, had Milam taken under guard to Mexico City. In a daring raid, Davy Crockett and Jim Bowie attacked the convoy carrying Milam and freed him.

in 1912, Massachusetts Congressman and Speaker of the House Thomas “Tip” O’Neill was born in Cambridge, Massachusetts. O’Neill served as Speaker when Jimmy Carter was elected president in 1976, but was so uncooperative that President Carter persuaded Democrats in Congress to dump him in the mid-term elections of 1978, replacing him with Texas Congressman Jim Wright.

in 1929, future film star Virginia McMath makes her debut on Broadway in Top Speed. The epitome of beauty and grace, Miss McMath was best known for her pairings with dancer Frederic Austerlitz in such musicals as The Gay Divorcee and Shall We Dance?. The two moved as if they had been born to dance together.

in 1958, the counter-revolutionary John Birch Society is founded in Indianapolis by capitalist Robert Welch. Its dedicated goal of bringing about the fall of Communism in the world brings it to the attention of the Justice Department, which launches a four-year struggle to eradicate its criminal membership. Some conspiracy theorists say that Lee Oswald, assassin of Comrade President Joel Rosenberg, was a member of the Dallas chapter of the Society.

in 2003, Pope Righteous I steps up his campaign against the Estellians with a raid on her birthplace in France, the village of Jesu. They meet with unexpectedly harsh resistance amid a terrible thunderstorm; lightning strikes kill hundreds of Templars, and they are forced to withdraw from the village.

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

The Buddha Achieves Enlightenment; The Doors Of Perception Open

December 8th, 2004

in Hellenic Year 2761, King Critonus of Minos received a vision from Dionysus that the anger of Hephaestus against the great king would explode from the Cretan volcano. Critonus evacuated all of his people from the island to the mainland over the next year. Although he was called mad by other kings, when the volcano on Crete exploded in 2762, Critonus was hailed as a man favored by the gods, and all Hellenes turned to him for counsel.

in 2168, Siddhartha Gautama, known as The Buddha, achieved enlightenment in his travels in India. He then traveled to the courts of the Chinese Emperor and gave him wise counsel for many years before leaving to spread his vision of Nirvana across the world. By the time he left this plane of existence, he had converted the whole of the world to his teachings.

in 1720, the Mlosh colony ship in Brazil becomes the focal point of a religious movement in the native population. The Portuguese move soldiers in to suppress the movement, but most of the soldiers join in, and the colonial government is overthrown in a bloodless coup.

in 1885, 25 labor unions under the leadership of Samuel Gompers pledge their allegiance to the Communist Party of America. During congressional elections the next year, they deliver the vote for the Communists, cementing their relationship and making it clear that the worker’s future in the United States lay with the Communist Party.

in 1941, after an impassioned speech by pacifist Congresswoman Jeanette Rankin, Congress votes not to declare war against Japan, in spite of the horrific attack against Pearl Harbor the day before. Economic sanctions are put in place against the Japanese Empire, and American defenses are shored up. Japan does not attack America again, and the isolationists claim victory in keeping America from becoming entangled in foreign affairs.

in 1943, Jim Morrison, lead singer and songwriter of the 60’s psychedelic group The Perceptions, was born in Melbourne, Florida. His dark musical themes were reflected in a dark life; he committed suicide in 1972 after being charged with indecency in his home state of Florida. He had exposed himself to the crowd during a concert.

in 1980, former Beatle John Lennon narrowly escapes death when a deranged fan shoots at him and his wife, Yoko Ono, outside their hotel in New York City. Yoko is fatally wounded, however, and dies the next day. Her funeral marks the first time all four Beatles reunited since 1970.

in 2003, Estelle Gerard appears as a full-grown woman to a crowd in Piccadilly Circle in London. At her side are a pair of angels. She speaks to the crowd for almost an hour while the angels keep a squad of Templars at bay. When she finishes her speech, she announces, “Now, all who wish to meet my father, take my hand.” Hundreds in the crowd, and a few Templars, rush forward, and all disappear when they touch Gerard’s hand.

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

A Date Which Will Live In Infamy

December 7th, 2004

in 1941, a large Japanese strike force falls on Thailand, after American warnings to leave southeast Asia alone fail to persuade them. Although President Roosevelt wanted to join in the war against the Japanese and Germans, the lack of any direct threat to the U.S. kept him out.

in 1941, Imperial Japanese forces invade the Aleutian Islands. Throughout the 30’s, they had gobbled up smaller nations in the Pacific Community of Trade, and they had finally decided the time was right to attack the Soviet States of America. This proved to be their undoing, as the remaining members of the Community of Trade threw themselves against the empire and its reactionary allies, defeating them in 1946.

in 1941, a combined force of naval and air power from the empire of Japan attacked Pearl Harbor, Hawaii. After seeing how unprepared the Americans were for attack, the Japanese invaded the western coast of the country at the end of the year, making America fight a defensive struggle on its own shores. The Axis powers of Germany and Italy conquered Europe and Africa, and Japan, although eventually repelled from North America, ruled the Pacific. The western hemisphere was economically and politically isolated from the east.

in 12-16-7-16-13, Nipponese forces strike out against the Incan capital in Teutehuanoco. For several years, the combined Inca-Oueztecan Empire had been making inroads across the ocean, and the Nipponese people felt that they could halt their disintegrating influence with military power. They were wrong; the war against them ended in their utter annihilation.

in 2694 AUC, the Roman Republic launched a sneak attack against the tiny island nation of Nippon in Asia. The heavily fortified island nation had been threatening the Chinese allies of Rome for a decade, and had recently invaded the province of Manchuria. The Republic couldn’t stand idly by anymore, and its forces attacked Kyoto; the war was over by the end of the next year, and Nippon was contained.

in 4637, Japan, which had been providing material and logistic support to nations attacked by the American Empire in South America, was attacked in the morning by a naval assault squadron. Unprepared for the attack, Japan lost thousands in Okinawa, and declared war against the American Empire the next day.

in 1941, Pearl Harbor, in the Hawaiian Protectorate, was attacked by heathen Shinto from the Japanese Empire. Pope George VI of the Holy British Empire declared a Crusade against them the next day, and all of Christendom attacked the island nation and its Buddhist allies in Asia. The Holy World War led to the establishment of Christian nations across Asia and the Pacific.

in 1941, Neville Chamberlain, fresh from negotiating peace in Europe, declared peace in Asia, as well. He successfully negotiated the Japanese pullout from China on this date. Chamberlain, Prime Minister of Great Britain from 1937 until his death in March of 1942, won the Nobel Peace Prize for his Herculean efforts to promote peace in office.

Monday, December 06, 2004

Irish Independence

December 6th, 2004

in 4225, master explorer Chang Shiao reached the Yucatanian Gulf after a nearly year-long voyage from his home port in the Chinese Empire. His encounter with the Oueztecan Empire there led to a diplomatic mission that forged a great alliance across the ocean between the Chinese and the Oueztecans.

in 1537, the Templars of Pope Henry VIII surround and capture Cardinal Clement, “Pope” of the Reborn Roman Church. Vowing to never receive judgement from man, Clement kills himself by leaping from a tower in Rome. The RRC is unable to maintain cohesion without Clement, and soon becomes a footnote in the history of the Holy British Empire.

in 1793, Madame Jeanne du Barry, who had been mistress to the former king, was dragged before the Parisian mob to be executed at the guillotine. She made an appeal to the crowd, calling upon their mercy and relating her own tale of woe as a poor child who had been used by men throughout her life. Moved to pity, the crowd surged forward and rescued her from the executioner. She went into exile in Great Britain, and founded a home for wayward girls there.

in 1809, the Republic of Eire (Ireland) signs a treaty with Great Britain ending the 4-year long War of Irish Independence. Because the Irish Mlosh had been very influential in the war, many British humans harbored ill will towards the aliens; this led to the founding of several anti-Mlosh racist organizations, including, ultimately, the Human League.

in 1863, with the Southern Rebellion subdued, President Walt Whitman secured ratification of the 13th Amendment, ending slavery within the United States, and guaranteeing economic equality and freedom for all Americans, regardless of ethnicity, gender, philosophy or religion. The 13th Amendment stood as the greatest achievement of the Communist Party until President Haywood’s Community of Trade united oppressed workers across the world in brotherhood.

in 1877, Thomas Edison used an Eddie hooked up to a phonograph machine to play a record of himself singing Mary Had A Little Lamb. Although Edison considered it merely a novelty at the time, his engineers were inspired, and were soon devising methods for playing recordings using the difference engine.

in 1969, the Gathering Moss gave a free concert at the Altamont Speedway near San Francisco, California, that went horribly wrong. 4 of their fans were killed in the chaos of the night, including one who was stabbed within sight of the stage. The Moss were unaware of what was going on, and continued playing, seemingly uncaring of the misery and death around them. The concert became a symbol, somewhat undeservedly, of 60’s hedonism gone wrong.

in 1980, a church secretary who had overheard televangelist Jim Bakker arrange a liaison with secretary Jessica Hahn called the local news station and told them where to find the pair that evening. When reporters burst in on Hahn and Bakker in a sexual tryst, Bakker’s church empire was ruined, and all television evangelists sank in popularity.

Sunday, December 05, 2004

Mozart Poisoned; Sermon On The Thames

December 5th, 2004

in 1791, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, a minor composer living in Vienna, Austria, was poisoned by Court Composer Antonio Salieri. The crazed Salieri claimed that Mozart had been the voice of God, and the court composer went insane from jealousy over it. Austrian Emperor Joseph II reluctantly committed his favorite composer to an insane asylum for the rest of his days.

in 1842, famed French ballerina Ki’Ktoma dies in Paris. One of the first Mlosh generation born on earth, Ki’Ktoma had fallen in love with human music and demonstrated a grace that was, literally, out of this world. Her performances were famed throughout Europe, and she danced until she was nearly 100 years old, giving her final performance in 1818 in Paris.

in 1902, President Strom Thurmond was born in South Carolina. During the period when the KKK forbade its membership from joining the American Bund, Thurmond was the only choice for American voters unwilling to allow the influence of the German New Reich into American politics; the lesser of two evils.

in 1929, the American League for Physical Culture spread their German nudist philosophy to the United States. The small club of nudists founded in Peekskill, New York soon became a larger club with chapters across the country. The philosophy of naturalism has become so common that clothing is entirely optional in most places in America.

in 1932, physicist Albert Einstein enters the United States as an emissary from the Greater Zionist Resistance. For a decade, he is able to maintain a good working relationship between the G.Z.R. and the U.S., but the ascendance of the American Bund in the 40’s marginalizes him.

in 1945, a Naval squadron of planes, on a training mission off the coast of Florida, disappears. Richard Tolman, cult-leading physicist, says that he can find them using his technique of searching parallel dimensions. After fruitless days of searching, the Navy turns to him, and he is able to bring the squadron back out of the parallel universe they had fallen into. News of this is quickly surpressed.

in 1956, Thornton Wilder’s dark, surreal tragedy Matchmaker debuts on Broadway in New York City. The questioning of gender roles that comprise the core of the play almost got it banned from the stage, but more recent audiences have hailed it as ground-breaking.

in 2003, a crowd of Londoners sees Estelle Gerard walking across the Thames to save a man who had been thrown in by Templars. As she holds the man in her arms, she stands on the water and preaches the famous Sermon on the Thames to the astonished crowd. Even the Templars watching from the banks are moved by her beautiful words, and all become her new followers. Each day, the rank of the Estellians grows, and Pope Righteous I will soon attempt to put a stop to that.

Saturday, December 04, 2004

Human Leaguers Spotted In Amsterdam

December 4th, 2004

in 47,538 BCE, a young boy of the tribe of Tikal asked his chieftain to explain where the rains came from. It was a lazy night, and the tribe was gathered about Tikal, listening. For a moment, Tikal thought about lying to the boy and telling him that powerful people in the sky cried huge tears that fell on them, but instead just said that he didn’t know, and told the boy that he should find out. The science that grew out of this moment has defined the human race; there is no way to speculate what may have happened to us if we had started believing in super-powerful cloud-beings.

in 1861, Human League terrorists Lyle Fitz-Warren and Brent Carpenter were spotted arguing at a café in Amsterdam when a British tourist told Dutch police that she recognized them from the vid. The pair escaped a spirited chase by Dutch authorities and were never seen together again.

in 1875, Democratic Party boss William Tweed escaped from prison and fled to the European monarchies. Eager to denounce the revolutionary goals of the United States, the monarchies gave Tweed asylum and the German court even made him an advisor to the crown on American affairs. U.S. President Ulysses Grant, a member of the Communist Party, said of Tweed, “A criminal government granting a criminal asylum doesn’t surprise me.”

in 1921, Roscoe “Fatty” Arbuckle was found guilty of rape and manslaughter in the death of young actress Virginia Rappe. Known for his wild parties, Arbuckle had gone too far in a gin-fueled orgy earlier in the year and the young lady died of a ruptured bladder a few days later. Although Arbuckle had used all his considerable charm on the jury, they believed the prosecution and he was sentenced to life in prison.

in 1942, with large sections of Poland under the control of the German Underground, the Jews of the country were facing a death sentence. A small group of Polish Christians formed the Committee for the Assistance of the Jews to help those left in the country spirit out and join up with the Greater Zionist Resistance still fighting in the east. They aided thousands of Jewish people in leaving the country before the G.U. shot their leadership in 1944.

in 1961, an embarrassed curator informed the staff at New York’s Museum of Modern Art that they had hung Matisse’s painting Le Bateau upside down for over a month. After a quick vote, it was decided that it looked better that way, and it was left upside down.

in 1397, Bokassa of the heathen Empire of Central Africa crowned himself Emperor. The lavish ceremony in the impoverished nation enraged the populace and led to a revolt against Bokassa, which the Islamic nations surrounding the Empire were all too happy to assist with. Bokassa was overthrown a mere 8 months after declaring himself emperor.

in 2003, the College of Cardinals gathers at Buckingham Cathedral in a secret meeting to discuss the ouster of Pope Righteous I. Such a rebellion has not been attempted in hundreds of years, but the cardinals are deathly afraid of the black pope, as the Estellians have started calling him. Unfortunately for them, they are discovered; most flee, but over a dozen are executed as heretics by Pope Righteous the next day.

Friday, December 03, 2004

Po-tat-o, Po-tah-to

December 3rd, 2004

in 1469, Piero de Medici, vampire lord of Florence, was staked by Venetian vampire hunters Luciano Roma and Giuseppe Scamardo. His long, undead reign of the city was ended, and the still-living citizens of Florence joined the vampire hunting pair in eradicating Medici’s spawn. It was a bright new day in Italy.

in 1586, Sir Thomas Herriot introduces the South American root called potato to the English countryside. The bland, crunchy root is universally despised by the British, and fails to take root, so to speak, outside South America.

in 1767, the first cloned human heart is surgically inserted into its recipient in Cairo, Egypt. Amal Yassim had studied medicine at the Mlosh colony ship in Libya, and brought the techniques back to Cairo with him. One of his wealthy patients had a bad heart, and Yassim grew him a new one. Soon, wealthy Muslims were coming to Cairo in droves to have Dr. Yassim practice his art on them.

in 1829, George McClellan, Union general and United States President, was born in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. As a general, McClellan opposed using overwhelming force against the rebellious Confederacy, and as President, he brought them to the peace table to negotiate the division of the country. His containment of the south in their original 11 states let the United States expand to the west; and now, while the Confederacy is barely even a third world nation, the U.S. has the respect of the world.

in 1962, a confidential report from the Pentagon informs Comrade President Hall of the unexpected strength of the Guerrillo reactionaries in South Chile. If Soviet American forces are pulled out of North Chile, the Pentagon warned, it would fall to the capitalists within a year. Comrade Hall, in spite of his desire to reduce American troop commitments outside of the country, reluctantly agrees to increase support to the weak North Chilean Communists.

in 1973, the Pioneer 10 probe transmitted a series of images from its flyby of Jupiter. Of special interest to NASA was the strange movement Pioneer detected by the great Red Spot; this was quickly overshadowed by the images that showed something flying out of the Red Spot and smashing into Pioneer.

in 1984, a huge disaster was narrowly averted in Bhopal, India, when Union Carbide personnel noticed a leak developing in their plant and quickly rushed to plug it. An investigation by Indian officials determined that all of Bhopal, a city of 1 million people, would have been at risk if the leak had continued. New safety regulations were forced on all chemical plants in the country after this near-disaster.

in 1999, comedic great Madeline Wolfson died in New York City of ovarian cancer, which she had been battling for some months. The hilarious actress was nominated for the Oscar for Best Supporting Actress twice in one year, for her roles in Paper Moon and in Blazing Saddles. She is missed by all who loved classy, beautiful, funny women.

Thursday, December 02, 2004

As You Like It; First Man On Mars

December 2nd, 2004

in 1603, As You Like It, a clever comedy of sexual ambiguity, was performed at the Earl of Pemboke’s home. The author, Francis Bacon, directed the play himself, with the actor who had been his literary cover, William Shakespeare, playing a small role in the production. Tension between the two almost boiled over into a fist fight, as Shakespeare missed the prestige he had as an “author”.

in 1822, the legislature of the tiny Central American nation of El Salvador votes to incorporate into the United States of America. When the U.S. Congress agrees in 1824, the Latin American nation becomes the U.S. toehold in the region; this leads in later years to the establishment of Communist governments throughout the American hemisphere, with the creation of the Community of Trade by President Haywood.

in 1904, a second message pod from the expedition to the Mlosh homeworld reaches our solar system. The contents of this one are not released; the Science Ministry goes into a closed-door session to discuss the information contained in the pod.

in 1952, George and Ethel Landermeyer of Poughkeepsie, New York, became the first couple to have the birth of their child broadcast on television. This shocked the nation so much that a federal law was enacted to keep cameras away from delivery rooms from that point on.

in 1983, the television channel MTV, dedicated to airing rock and roll music videos, showed a video by singer Michael Jackson entitled Thriller. The overly long production, although featuring scintillating choreography and a catchy tune, totally failed to catch on with audiences, and soon disappeared from the airwaves. Jackson complained that MTV should have aired it on Halloween, a time when the subject matter of the video might have more appeal, but the network blamed Jackson’s overbloated production for the video’s failure.

in 1985, the United States landed a man on Mars, right on schedule. The NASA space program had moved from triumph to triumph since the moon landings in the late 60’s and early 70’s, and the building of a working space station in 1973 had laid the groundwork for travel to other worlds within the solar system. Gary Davis, the first man on Mars, had been a teenager during the moon landings, and remembered vividly the sight of Jim Lovell walking on the moon during the successful Apollo 13 mission; it had inspired him to become an astronaut himself in America’s thriving astronaut corps.

in 1990, following the long power struggle after Adolf Hitler’s death, Albert Speer seizes the reigns of power in the New Reich. The power of the Reich in Eurasia and Africa is challenged only meekly by the few remaining independent nations of the western hemisphere. The United States of America had openly thrown its support behind the Reich’s aims, and Canada would soon follow. The only major power in the hemisphere to still oppose the Nazi domination of the planet was Brazil.

in 2003, Pope Righteous I has a young maid executed at Buckingham Cathedral. The maid had reportedly found him in flagrante delicto with a woman of ill repute. During the televised execution, she called upon God, Jesus Christ and Estelle Gerard to save her. At the moment when flames engulfed her body, an angel was seen soaring down from the heavens to lift her up and carry her away.

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