Pope Richard I Dies; Mlosh Rename Australia Ml'Astra

May 29, 2004:

in 1224, Pope Richard I of the Holy British Empire, (popularly known as Bloody Rich), died of an infection suffered when an arrow struck him in the chest in an assassination attempt. In his last words before his death at the hand of Papal Guards, the assassin proclaimed himself a protester against the cruelties of the Church; this spawned the anti-Church movement known as "Protestantism".

in 1600, Francis Bacon's play Hamlet premiered at the Globe Theater in London. The Bard of the Thames had dropped his nom de plume of William Shakespeare the year before.

mg 9867, eyr ryya liet mnast kell morissia donto ki quierrecho. Iteyo manda ni calla por stirr'ya. Rak bin Rak masto ni kell simpa.

in 1776, the Mlosh colony in Australia renamed it Ml'Astra and declared their independence from both Great Britain and the main Mlosh population. The aboriginal population of Ml'Astra embraced the Mlosh as liberators in ways that most other human populations never did, partially due to the horrors the British had visited on them.

in 1887, the Eddie got its first competitor, in the form of the French Pascal Difference Engine. The PDE was a full ton lighter than the Eddie, a valuable selling point, as many buildings had to be reinforced before an Eddie could be placed in them. This hidden cost of owning an Eddie had made sales slower than they might have been, and spurred Edison to drive his engineers to work on miniaturizing the Eddie.

in 1947, the US government declared the war with Germany over, admitting defeat on that front, and concentrated its forces against the Japanese advance. Canadian forces surrendered to the Japanese army in Alaska, and the British government-in-exile began preparations for moving to America.

in 2000, the earth was scoured of all native life by He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.