The state of TIAH
November 21st, 2006
Alternate Historian's Note: November is NaNoWriMo, National Novel Writing Month. In 2004, we produced our novel Warp, and last year we got a start on The Protocols Of The Elders Of Zion during this annual event. Both of these novels were based on timelines from TIAH – Warp was based on the Mlosh timeline, and Protocols on the Greater Zionist Resistance timeline. Although we posted numerous links to these novels on Lulu, TIAH didn't post any excerpts from them. We're going to do it a little differently this year. This year, the November posts on TIAH will be excerpts from the novel that is being written by us for NaNoWriMo. We will still have Guest Historian entries – Stephen Payne (who has compiled several and made them available on Lulu for free – just go through the Add to Cart system to get it) has some already written and waiting, and he is going to be joined by Guest Historian JD – so, if you want to make a Guest Post this month, go ahead and send it to us, and it will appear along with our novel post.
in 1872, 2-year-old child Sophia Matilda Briggs is drawing in the Captain’s Quarters. Pictures of goats litter the room. -entry by Steve Payne from Counter History in Context - You're the Judge!-
in 1946, Group Captain Sir Douglas Robert Steuart Bader CBE DSO and Bar DFC and Bar FRAeS DL LegH CdeG RAF pleads guilty to the charge of shooting down twenty two German planes during World War II, the fifth highest total in the RAF. Shot down himself on August 9, 1941 Bader was imprisoned at Stalag Luft III at Sagan and Colditz Castle Oflag IV-C where he made numerous escape attempts despite the loss of both legs in a pre-war flying accident . Bader and Air Vice-Marshal Trafford Leigh-Mallory were active exponents of the controversial Big Wing theory, an aggressive policy of assembling large formations of defensive fighters north of London ready to inflict maximum damage on the massed German bomber formations as they flew over South East England. The duo failed to sell the strategy to the leaders of Fighter Command Air Marshal Hugh Dowding and Air Vice Marshal Keith Park; instead careful husbanding tactics were pursued by the RAF, contributing in no small part to the British defeat in the air war at the hands of the more aggressive Luftwaffe. The four were still arguing about the pros and cons of the two strategies right up until the execution of Bader on Christmas Eve of 1946. -entry by Steve Payne from Counter History in Context - You're the Judge!-
in 1953, Officials at the British Natural History Museum have finished their study of the Piltdown Man skull and are preparing to release their findings to the press. A young researcher retrieves the skull from cold storage to perform one more chemical analysis on the substance used to stain the cranium to give it the appearance of age, when he notices something odd. Residue of some variety has built up on the interior of the skull, and the entire object feels slightly heavier in his hand. Before his very eyes, the skull's darkened sheen begins to fade, leaving it the color of fresh bone within minutes. By the time he can summon his superiors and return to the laboratory, the artifact has changed in an even more frightening way; The broken gaps in the skull have sealed, and new growth is evident along the fractured mandible where the monkey's jaw was supposed to have attached.
Within three hours, the jaw is whole and well-formed, complete with teeth, a layer of pinkish-gray flesh has grown over the entire artifact, and it has become warm. The panicked staff of the Museum are at a loss to explain or deal with this phenomenon, and place calls to several eminent university professors, as well as the Ministry of Health. The researcher under whose notice the transformation began tentatively and fearfully suggests destroying the skull, before being angrily shouted down by the scientists in attendance. Later, however, some of these would have cause to regret their overreaction... - entry by Guest Historian JD -
in 2126, the moderate members in the Peace and Reconciliation Committee of the Reconstructed United Nations triumph. The showcase trial of Saddam Hussein Abd al-Majidida al-Tikriti versus the redneck George Walker Bush ends in farce when the Arab nationalist Hussein confesses his weakness for imperial consumerism. Post-jihad anger is released and the consensus is that just like Hussein all men are guilty of human weakness. Even Rafsanjani confesses that Bush has struck a blow for truth. Case closed. -entry by Steve Payne from Counter History in Context - You're the Judge!-
Kevin walked into the Armory and saluted the officer sitting at the desk. “I'm Specialist Kevin Bradley; I was ordered to report to duty in Bryan, but I ain't gonna make it there.”
The officer returned the salute and snorted. “KBE, right?” Kevin nodded. “Yeah, they been threatenin' a lot of folks. Don't worry, Specialist Bradley, we'll let your unit in Bryan know you're here with us.” The officer turned to his computer and pulled up Kevin's file. “Computer specialist?”
“We could use you, then. They requisitioned all of ours for some mission up in Dallas.” He printed a form out and pulled out a pen. “Sign here, Bradley, and you're safe from prosecution.”
Kevin took the pen and signed his name on the line at the bottom. “Why do I feel like I'm gonna wish I was back in Bryan?”
“Cuz you are,” the officer said, taking the form and filing it away. “We're sendin' you into Waco.”
Kevin blinked a couple of times. “Waco?”
“Yep, they want to collect some information that's on the computers at Baylor. They can't connect through the Internet, so we have to send somebody in to see if the EMP took 'em out or if the connection's just down.”
“Beggin' your pardon, sir, but isn't there radiation in Waco?”
“High levels, from what they tell us,” the officer said. “You'll need a suit.” He picked up his phone and dialed an extension. “Morris, get in here.”
A tall black sergeant walked into the room and saluted the officer, who returned it. “Sergeant Morris, Specialist Bradley.” The two shook hands, and the officer continued on. “Morris, you're going to escort Bradley here to Baylor University in Waco - “
“Waco, sir?” Morris was a little shocked.
“Did I stutter?” After Morris regained his composure, the officer went on. “Give him the crash course in how to use a hazmat suit, and make sure he don't die while he's there.” The officer printed out the mission parameters and handed them to Morris, with a copy for Kevin. “Dismissed. And good luck.”
“Waco,” Morris muttered as they walked towards the supply wing. “Who'd I piss off?”
“Not anybody worse than me,” Kevin said, chuckling. “I just won last night's lottery.”
Sergeant Morris stopped and placed a hand on Kevin's chest. “The lottery. Millions of dollars.”
“That's why you're in Austin?”
Morris slapped Kevin's back and howled. “Bradley, you have got to be the unluckiest lucky son of a gun in the world!”
The Guard unit here was almost deserted; most of the soldiers were already out in the field. They didn't pass anyone as they marched their way into the hazardous materials room. Sergeant Morris picked out a pair of protective suits and tossed one to Kevin. “All right, first lesson is how to get dressed.”
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