Elvis=Steve Ballmer?

The state of TIAH

August 16th, 2006

in [time unknown], the crews of the Pokor and the Eagle don space suits and exit their ships. The atmosphere of the brown planet is cold even by Amandaran standards, and the air is heavy with a strange element that all of the doctors on board feel is toxic. The landing area that the Pokor has been set down in is surrounded by high walls, so that they cannot see anything beyond the opening beckoning them to come forward. “You know, for the first time since I met you, I feel afraid,” Captain Mawrao said to Commander Patterson. “I hope it goes away, soon.” They led their people forward to the opening.

in 1977, Jesse Presley, depressed over the deterioration of his physical state and his relationships, took an overdose of barbiturates and collapsed. Although he was still alive when his girlfriend found him at his Memphis mansion, he was dead by the time an ambulance got him to the hospital. The entire world mourned the loss of the musical legend, and his grave, next to his infant twin brother Elvis', was quickly flooded with flowers and memorabilia of his long career in rock and roll. Some even refused to believe that he was dead, saying that he faked his death in order to escape from the pressures that superstardom were exerting on him.

in 1977, Elvis Presley, after secretly securing a body double at the morgue, slipped out of his Graceland mansion in Memphis and started the new life he had been craving for 6 years. Although he only took a few million with him, he was able to keep himself in luxury while in hiding because of his investment in a small company a friend had told him about called Microsoft. Slowly, he worked off the excess pounds he had put on during his bouts of depression, and shaved his head so that his trademark locks wouldn't give his identity away. He looked years younger than his actual age, and decided to take a new course in life – he learned about computers and under the name of Steve Ballmer, used his investments to secure himself a position inside Microsoft and direct the company.

in 2004, the King of Rock and Roll, Elvis Presley, died in a tour bus in Alabama after a particularly exciting concert. Elvis's heart had been weak for years, although after a mild attack in the late 70's, he had started an exercise regime to help strengthen it. He often credited his love of the martial arts for helping him get off the drugs he had been addicted to for decades. They had taken their toll, though, and Elvis' last concert was enough to push it too far. Fans around the world mourned the only man to have #1 hits in 6 decades – Paul McCartney, one of the surviving Beatles and possibly the only man capable of breaking that record of Elvis', said, “The King is dead. I'm just a little Beatle in his shadow,” and swore off rock and roll out of tribute to the legend's passing.

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Texas Troubles

July 30th, 2007

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The Announcement

Sheep were so stupid.
Djari hated sheep. He hated having to watch them, having to shear them, having to herd them and protect them. He especially hated having to eat them, which he was doing right now. The meat was tough, and there was still some wool on it. It made him feel like he was biting one of them while it was still alive. His stomach churned at the thought of it, and he put the leg back on the hot stones to warm up some more.
Most of the sheep were asleep; it was late at night, and he had been driving them all day, so they were tired. He understood the feeling. He felt the exhaustion in his bones. His father and brother would normally be here, as well, but his brother was tending to a sick child and his father was tending to a sick calf. So, he was going to have to wait until the sheep were back home before he slept.
He shifted on the rocks, trying to find a comfortable spot. There wasn’t one, but hope sprang eternal. The lamb sizzled by the fire, and the smell wafted away on the wind. He almost hoped it would bring something hoping to catch dinner; he could stand some excitement. The stars drifted above him, and he looked for the warrior his father had told him about once; he had been so great that Allah couldn’t take him from the earth, so he was placed in the stars to always watch over the faithful. The warrior always comforted him on nights like this.
He started awake; something had spooked the sheep, and they were bleating and milling about. He cursed at himself for falling asleep, took up his staff, and waded into the herd to see what the matter was.

Maybe you didn't treat me Quite as good as you should have Maybe you didn't love me Quite as often as you could have Little things you should have said and done You just never took the time
Elvis Presley	You were always on my mind Tell me, tell me that your sweet love hasn't died I'll give you, give you one more chance To keep me satisfied, satisfied ~ Lyrics to “Always on My Mind” - Click to Play Sample
Cuckold

Reference has often been made to Presley's allegedly numerous conquests. According to eyewitness Byron Raphael, who worked for Presley's manager, the star even had a secret one-night stand with Marilyn Monroe. In reality, the King was celibate and dated famous women solely for presentational purposes as a red-blooded American icon. Peter Guralnick's two-volume biography of Elvis Presley Last Train to Memphis concludes simply “he wasn't really interested”. Trouble was this acting continued into his marriage to Priscilla Beaulieu. And jealousy was to have fatal consequences. In his wife's biography Elvis and Me she confesses to being a “wild child”, indulging in an affair with a mutual acquaintance - Mike Stone, a karate instructor. Elvis raged obsessively: "There's too much pain in me... Mike Stone [must] die. The full lyrics are available at Upper Cut Music

~ quotation by Co-Historian Steve Payne from Counter-history – You're the Judge!

In 1947, T.E. Lawrence was murdered by the underground Jewish group Lehi. Lawrence and Count Folke Bernadotte who also died, had been appointed United Nations Security Council mediators in the Arab-Israeli conflict and were making considerable progress which now appears to have been scuppered by extremists. Lawrence was born in North Wales in 1888 and educated at Oxford High School and Jesus College, Oxford. From 1911 to 1914 Lawrence worked as an archaeologist in the Middle East for the British Museum excavations team in Northern Syria. On 1st November 1914 the Ottoman Empire declared war on Great Britain. In 1915 he was posted as an intelligence officer to Cairo and subsequently travelled to Hejaz to assess the leadership and prospects of the Arab revolt. Seven Pillars of Wisdom is a description of his liaison role between British and Arab forces. Lawrence was determined that the wartime promises of self government made to the Arabs by the British government would be honoured. He helped achieve settlements he considered honourable in Iraq and Jordan. Lawrence returned to England in 1918 and subsequently advised Faisal I, then King of Syria (1918-1920), at the Paris Peace Conference in 1919 and worked in the Middle East Department of the Colonial Office in 1921. In 1922 he enlisted in the ranks of the RAF as John Hume Ross to avoid public attention. He adopted the name T.E. Shaw by deed poll in 1927. Lawrence served for 12 years, latterly working to develop RAF rescue launches which saved thousands of lives in World War II. In 1935, aged 46, he narrowly escaped death in a motorcycle accident. Desperately needing an inspirational leader for the North Africa campaign, in 1940 Churchill re-appointed Lawrence of Arabia as Commander of the British Eighth Army where he defeated Rommel's Afrika Corps and Italian allies. Less publicly, he also executed a cadre of Egyptian officers who had been attempting to rid North Africa of Britain's presence. Gamal Abdul Nassar, Anwar el-Sadat and Hosni Said Mubarak were just three of the many “traitors” who were found mysteriously floating face down in the River Nile. After the war, Lawrence was instrumental in the creation of the state of Israel, and the key decision to hand the Canal Zone and the British bases over to David Ben-Gurion. Lawrence remained a powerful agent of change in the region until his tragic death.

~ alternate obituary from Steve Payne: extensive use of original content has been made to re-examine the significance of a controversial historical figure.

In 2009, the TV networks presented episode nineteen of So What If?. Historian Barry Malzberg was interviewed in January 1975 and considered the consequences of Nixon's 1960 election as President and what might have happened if Kennedy had been elected.

~ entry by Steve Payne from Counter History in Context - You're the Judge!

Luz Long	"It took a lot of courage for him to befriend me in front of Hitler... You can melt down all the medals and cups I have and they wouldn't be a plating on the twenty-four kilates friendship that I felt for Lutz Long at that moment. " ~ Jesse Owens at the Games of the XI Olympiad
German Olympic athlete

Jesse Owens on being advised and congratulated by Luz Long at the 1936 Summer Olympics. Carl Ludwig "Lutz" Long was a German Olympic athlete, most notable for giving advice to his competitor, Jesse Owens. Owens went on to win the gold medal for the broad jump, now referred to as the long jump, event at the 1936 Summer Olympics thanks to Long's advice. For his actions in the spirit of sportsmanship, Long was posthumously awarded the Pierre de Coubertin medal after fighting in Sicily and dying in a British military hospital.

~ quotation Steve Payne: this incredible event has not been modified by the Co-Historian

Jimmy Hoffa	In 1975, on this day Jimmy Hoffa disappeared from the parking lot of the Machus Red Fox restaurant in Bloomfield Hills, Michigan, a suburb of Detroit, at about 2:30 p.m. Hoffa took over the presidency of the Teamsters in 1957, worked tirelessly to expand the union and in 1964 succeeded in bringing virtually all North American ..
.. over-the-road truck drivers under a single national master freight agreement. Hoffa then pushed to try to bring the airlines and other transport employees into the union. This was of great concern to the United States government and business as a strike involving all transport systems would be devastating for the national economy. Richard Nixon decided to act, authorising the White House Special Investigations Unit known as the Plumbers to abduct Hoffa and bury him under Giant Stadium.
~ entry by Steve Payne from Counter History in Context - You're the Judge!

In 2002, the accounting law referred to as "The Sarbanes Oxley Act" (Pub. L. No. 107-204, 116 Stat. 745, also known as the Public Company Accounting Reform and Investor Protection Act of 2002 and commonly called SOX or Sarbox; July 30, 2002) was signed into law by United States President George W. Bush. The Public Company ..	Signing of SOX
.. Accounting Oversight Board was charged with overseeing, regulating, inspecting, and disciplining accounting firms in their roles as auditors of public companies. The board found malpractice in the leadership of Haliburton and Texas Rangers by George W Bush and Dick Cheney respectively. Both the President and the Vice-President were hoisted by their own petard.
~ entry by Steve Payne from Counter History in Context - You're the Judge!

England Victorious..	In 1966, at Wembley Stadium, host nation England won the Football World Cup. After ..
.. drawing 2-2 at the end of 90 minutes, England beat Germany 4-2. The winners medals were awarded by members of the British Royal Family, Saxe-Coburg-Gotha. Patriots were troubled by how much time the Queen and Duke of Edinburgh spent sympathising with defeated coach Helmut Schön, a conversation that was of course made in rapid and fluent German.
~ entry by Steve Payne from Counter History in Context - You're the Judge!

In 1619, in Jamestown, Virginia, the first representative assembly in the Americas, the House of Burgesses, convened for the first time. Later, after the American Revolution, institutional development resulted in the General Assembly which governs the Commonwealth of Virginia to this day.	House of Burges..
~ entry by Steve Payne from Counter History in Context - You're the Judge!

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Word

	Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me....I once was lost but now am found, was blind, but now, I see. T'was Grace that taught...my heart to fear. And Grace, my fears relieved. How precious did that Grace appear...the hour I first believed. Thro' many dangers, toils and snare, I have already come; 'Tis grace has brought me safe thus far, and grace will lead me home. ~ Amazing Graceland – Fall and Rise of a King (1982), Elvis Aaron Presley.

In 1983, Elvites were shocked by the relevations of the King's autobiography. Of course only people on the Dark Side of the Moon during the late sixties could be unaware of Presley's sharp decline during that traumatic period. Fortunately, a religious awakening had lifted Presley from the nadir of his career and personal life. Revealed for the first time however was some real shockers. The Las Vegas rape, addition to prescription drugs and a near death experience on August 17, 1977. It was revealed for the first time that the King was found on the floor of his Graceland bathroom by fiancee, Ginger Alden, having 'stumbled or crawled several feet'. CPR treatment saved Presley's life after he was officially pronounced dead at 3:30 pm at the Baptist Memorial Hospital. Whilst he had recorded a lot of Gospel tracks, it was the moment when he really began to believe.

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	In 2005, on this day occurred the event known as Mugabe's Prince handshake gaffe. Zimbabwean President Robert Mugabe made a diplomatic gaffe by shaking hands with Prince Charles Windsor at the Pope's funeral. The President was 'caught by surprise' when the Prince leaned over to greet him, Harare source said. Some politicians condemned Presidents' greeting as 'stupid' and 'not very sensible' following the Prince's alleged involvement in the assassination of his ex-wife. The Queen of Hearts had been hugely respected for her charitable works in the Southern Hemisphere and the Prince was now considered persona non grata.

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Microsoft	In 2007, consumers reacted in anger to an email today - 'MSN to increase the charge for Hotmail user fees.' Five years before on 25 February 2001, unconsidered comments were made by a Microsoft executive, who said the company was considering introducing fees for its free Hotmail service. It was one year after the dotcom crash and everybody, even mighty Microsoft, was pondering how to make some money on the internet. A stroke of genius, Hotmail now represents over 30% of Microsoft revenue. The Seattle giant had suffered from loss of revenue from software piracy for many years, and this services-led innovation enabled the corporation to grow sales explosively in the consumer market.
Fees Announced

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	In 1998, the Police confirm the arrest of millionaire singer George Michael while he was alone in a public toilet and have charged him with lewd behaviour. The heterosexual star later revealed that he had been lured into the toilet by a female Police Officer who had played a cruel game of 'I will show you mine, you show me yours and then I will nick you'.

Gay America was outraged by the obscenity. Public opinion was strongly against Michael, who had been safely assumed gay due to his provocative MTV coverage with fellow Wham! Star Andrew Ridgeley. Michael said it was 'My own stupid fault as usual'.

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	In 2008, Nunavut Tribal Chief Paul Okalik defended Democratic front-runner Barack Obama Monday over accusations from rival Hillary Clinton that he was secretly at ease with a hemispheric trade accord which he publicly blames for losing U.S. Jobs. Clinton's criticism, on the eve of make-or-break presidential nomination contests for her in Mannhattan, stemmed from a report by Kanatan television station CTV that an Obama economic adviser told Kanatan officials the candidate was not seriously considering disrupting the trade accord.

There was no intention to convey, in any way, that Senator Obama and his campaign team were taking a different position in public from views expressed in private, including about NAFTA, the embassy statement said. 'We deeply regret any inference that may have been drawn to that effect.' The consulate's written report of the meeting had left the suggestion that Obama's words on NAFTA were designed for a political audience and should not be taken too seriously, prompting an angry denial from the Obama campaign. Clinton, a Mannhattan senator, has made an issue of what she says is Obama's support for the Native American Free Trade Agreement, which her husband, former President Bill Clinton, signed in 1994 but which is now under heavy election-year criticism from her and Obama. The source of the dispute dated back to 1520, when Montezuma kicked the Spaniards out of Mexico and North AmerInds had similar success, leaving only the European colony on Manhattan Island. By the early twenty-first century, the Iroquois Federation had developed a modern economy based on the success of NAFTA.

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Stephen R. Donaldson	In 1968, Stephen Reeder Donaldson departed Vietnam. By inclination a conscientious objector, he had been compelled to serve in the armed forces. Much later, and after dropping out of his Ph.D. program and moving to New Jersey in order to write fiction, Donaldson made his publishing debut with the first 'Covenant' trilogy in 1977. That enabled him to move to a healthier climate. He now lives in New Mexico. Donaldson's two year compulsory military duty would be the deep undercurrent of his escapist fantasy writing. In 'The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant, the Unbeliever', the protagonist was a leper struggled with disempowerment in a Land he did not really believe in.
Unbeliever

Farewell, Unbeliever! Be true! You have wrought greatly for us. And with the Staff of Law we will be not unable to defend against the Despiser's ill. Take heart. Despair and bitterness are not the only songs in this world. ~ 'The Calling of Lions'.

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	In 1917, the February Revolution broke out in Imperial Russia. The Imperial German Government turn to the architect of the 1905 revolution, Father Gapon. He is sent in a sealed train to Russia in a second and increasingly desperate attempt to overthrow the House of Romanov that year.

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In 2001, BBC News reported - Donald Campbell's speedboat recovered: Divers have raised the wreck of Donald Campbell's boat, Bluebird, from the bottom of Coniston Water in Cumbria. The boat had lain there since the accident in 1967 which killed Campbell, 46, as he attempted to break the world water speed record. The craft was winched to the surface after a three-hour operation to tow it to the lakeside from its resting place, 150 feet (45 metres) below the surface of the lake. The quest to raise the boat was led by diver Bill Smith. Mr Smith said he was glad they had reached the boat as there was always the risk that less scrupulous souvenir hunters could get there first. 'You can see now she's in a remarkable state of preservation and she'll not rot away to nothing now, she can be kept this way,' he said. In final, startlig surprise, the body of Donald Campbell would be discovered on August 10th.

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In 1801, British and Ottoman soldiers took control of Abukir Bay in Egypt from Italian Imperial forces. Napoleon Buonaparte, Emperor of Italy, had assumed control of Egypt largely out of a desire to recreate the Roman Empire. Unfortunately for the Little Italian, it placed him perilously close to the Ottoman Empire, which joined forces with the northern European allies against Italy.

In 12-18-19-16-12, the composer for the Incan court, Bekcheco, died in his sleep in the Incan capitol of Cuszo. Bekcheco had been known for his musical styles that appealed so highly to the young people of the continent, combining eastern rhythms with more civilized traditional Oueztecan music.

	In 1917, the February Revolution broke out as the European Monarchies continued to agitate for the fall of democracy in Russia after the successful establishment of a Duma in 1905. The Imperial German Government subsequently sent Communist Vladimir Lenin in a sealed train in a second and increasingly desperate attempt at revolution that year. Ace of Spies and British Agent Sidney Reilly reported it was hopeless, democracy was infectious and would likely spread into Western Europe during the early 1920s if no further invention occurred.

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In 1994, South African troops, allies of the U.S., accept the surrender of Madagascar. Although the war in the Indian Ocean Theater is just beginning, South Africa is sweeping across its neighbors with alarming speed. In some respects, they are doing even better than President Ralph Shephard's troops in the western hemisphere.