Sunday, January 16, 2005

No Translation Of The Bible; 18th Amendment Ratified

January 16th, 2005

in 47,372 BCE, Swikolay, great-granddaughter of the Speaker, reaches the northern shore of Australia and sets her 6 traveling companions to building boats. During the days it takes them to craft vessels large and strong enough to carry them, she watches the sky and tries to remember the stars as they changed during her last voyage.

in 1604, the Hampton Court conference reported to King James I that they were unable to agree on a translation of the Bible into English. The King had charged them with this daunting task in order to cut down on the confusion resulting from the many different English versions of the good book, but even the august and learned men of the King’s choosing were unequal to the task.

in 1901, reactionary dictator Fulgencio Batista of Cuba was born in the Oriente Province. Although the Socialist comrades of the island nation treated him well, Batista was moved to join the battle against the rightful Cuban leaders because of the corruption of his youth in the capitalist slums of Havana. The Soviet States of America initially supported him in his revolution, but turned against him when he revealed his true stripes at the end of the 50’s.

in 1904, the Plutonian talks between Li’Kanto’Mk of the Congress of Nations and Ji’Mish’Miko, representing the Mlosh homeworld, produce a written request from the Mlosh homeworld for all the Mlosh to visit their homeworld again. The homeworld grants a request from the C.N. ambassador for an emissary to visit the homeworld to determine what has become of the expedition that was sent.

in 1919, the U.S. ratified the 18th amendment to its constitution, prohibiting the sale of all intoxicating substances, except under extreme medical emergency. The suddenly sober nation quickly drafted and ratified the 19th amendment, repealing the 18th, the following year.

in 1969, neo-Nazis converge on the laboratory of Faisal Yassin and Wilhelm Schoemann, ready to make a new world in their perverted image. They are feted by the original conspirators, and prepared for their journey back in time by Schoemann. After seeing the caliber of men the neo-Nazis are entrusting with this operation, Schoemann begins to have serious second thoughts.

in 1976, A&M Records released the worst disaster of their history, Frampton Comes Alive. The double-LP live recording of former Humble Pie guitarist Peter Frampton performing in San Francisco was savaged by the critics and ignored by fans still angry over his leaving the band. Virtually the entire pressing of the album ended up in remainder bins around the world.

in 1979, Shah Reza Pahlavi of Iran has the leader of the Islamic revolutionary movement against him, the Ayatollah Khomeini, assassinated along with several other religious leaders in the country. The nation erupts in chaos, and the Shah is killed by his own guards the next month. Iraq’s Saddam Hussein, with U.S. blessing, carves out a large chunk of western Iran for his own, while Turkey, the Soviet Union and Pakistan take over portions of the rest of the country.


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2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Would that I lived in the timeline where "Framton Comes Alive" was a flop!

Alien Truther said...

The directory that held the forum seems to have disappeared - I'm working on seeing what happened to it.

TIAH Editor says we'd like to move you off the blog, if you're browsing the archives - and most people are - more than half of them are already on the new site. We need to be sure the new web site accomodates your archive browsing needs because we don't want to lose any readers. Please supply any feedback or comments by email to the Editor and please note the blogger site is shutting on December 1st.