Wednesday, December 15, 2004

The Speaker Is Born; The Holy City In The Clouds

December 15th, 2004

in 47,433 BCE, Telka the speaker is born to a small tribe in central Africa. The originator of the first conspiracy, Telka forged a pact with all of her descendants that one day they would touch the stars. Unknown to the world around them, many of her direct descendants are still working to carry out this plan.

en 1859, Ludwik L. Zamenhof estis nee en Poland. La inventor de la universala lingvo, Esperanto, estas honoree en todo la mondo hodiaux.

in 12-13-16-3-14, Oueztecan authorities captured and killed the Sioux holy man, Tatanka Iyotake. Iyotake had led resistance against Oueztec expansion for decades, and was suspected by them of leading the Ghost Dance movement of guerilla warfare against their outposts.

in 1961, the Architect of the New Reich, Adolf Eichmann, dies in Berlin of a heart attack. Rumors flew around the German capitol that he had been in bed with a prostitute, but they were squelched. American President Strom Thurmond sends his regrets to Fuehrer Adolf Hitler along with a note suggesting that this might be time for a warming of the cold war between the Reich and the U.S. Thurmond is being hounded on the right by American Bundists yammering to join in Hitler’s New World Order, and wishes to appear receptive to the idea.

in 1966, Laugh-O-Gram founder Walt Disney died at his home in Kansas City, Missouri. Disney and his brother Roy started an empire from a few performers telling jokes while delivering messages. Soon, his performers were singing, dancing and juggling their way into America’s hearts as the company went national. Its performers can still be called on today to give a smile to someone who needs a pick-me-up.

in 1972, restaurateur Carl Johnson, an Alabaman born and raised during the Great Depression, brought a series of recipes from his childhood to a mass market with his chain of Southern Fried Possum stores. The spicey meat treat was surprisingly popular across the country, and Johnson was soon a multi-millionaire.

in 1978, The Soviet States of America formally recognizes the capitalist state of Brazil. America had never recognized the counter-revolutionaries who overthrew the People’s Republic of Brazil in 1959, and had armed Communist rebels in the country for nearly 15 years. Comrade President John Anderson wished to work with the capitalists of the world, though, and he felt that recognizing one of the world’s largest nations was a good step in that direction.

in 2003, the Golden City of Jesu is seen over Jerusalem, when thousands of Jewish citizens suddenly disappear. Templar aircraft dispatched to the scene burst into flames and crash as soon as they come within missile range of the city in the clouds. Word from Buckingham Cathedral states that the city is a mass hallucination caused by drugs placed in the water supply of the holy city by Estellians.

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Y.H.N. said...

Only Anderson could go to Brazil.

Alan Kellogg said...

Jesu In The Clouds

You neglected to mention that the Jews taken up were not all Jewish by birth, and a sizable minority were not strictly observant. What did distinguish them from their neighbors was their adherence to a consistent code of ethics, and a consistency in behavior not often seen in these days of corruption and venality.

A follow up on the sequestering of the surviving Templar pilots would be a good idea, BTW. What is it about those men that scares the Holy British Empire so?

Anonymous said...

Sorry, Grammar Nazi here, but "It’s performers can still be called ..." = "It is performers can still be called ..."

"it's" = "it is"
"its" = possessive form of it

Robbie Taylor said...

Grammar Nazi, you are completely right - sometimes I rush too much and forget basic rules.

I love the Anderson going to Brazil line! I'm going to steal it shamelessly.

A cross between the X-Files and the book of Revelation - hmmmmmm.

Thanks for the comments, everybody!

Daedreem said...

HMMM... SOUTHERN FRIED POSSUM... sounds delish... happen to have a recipe? :)

Robbie Taylor said...

No, but I'm sure this guy does.

TIAH Editor says we'd like to move you off the blog, if you're browsing the archives - and most people are - more than half of them are already on the new site. We need to be sure the new web site accomodates your archive browsing needs because we don't want to lose any readers. Please supply any feedback or comments by email to the Editor and please note the blogger site is shutting on December 1st.