Monday, December 26, 2005

Washington Retreats From Trenton

December 26th, 2005

in 3761, a day after an unusual visit by three mysteriously disappointed men bearing wonderfully wealthy gifts, not to mention having a bright star shine in her eyes the entire previous night, a young Hebrew woman gave birth to a healthy boy she and her husband named Yeshua. He grew up to be an impressive carpenter in their home village of Nazareth.

in 1610, Count Gyorgy Thurzo defeats the lovely but dangerous vampiress, Countess Elizabeth Bathory, saving a dungeon full of young ladies who had been chosen as the next victims for the infamous countess. Count Thurzo had to fight his way through a horde of young vampiresses created by the countess, but God had saved him on the Christmas Day battle and led him to this victory.

in 1776, after a brief victory in Trenton, New Jersey, over Hessian forces, rebel General George Washington was forced to retreat since most of his men were still on the other side of the Delaware. What could have been a morale-boosting triumph was thus transformed into another humiliating withdrawal, and the rebel cause lost even more steam.

in 1792, Charles Babbage, a mathematical genius truly ahead of his time, was born this day near London, England. He developed the plans for a massive calculating machine he called the Difference Engine. Although he died without seeing the machine built, the Difference Engine he designed was built by Thomas Edison in 1872, and revolutionized the world.

in 4589, the first elected emperor of China is born in Hunan. Mao
Tse-Tung rose to the Imperial Council by virtue of his intellect, and was on the council when Emperor Dao-Ming established the beginnings of democracy in China.

in 1917, Socialist President Woodrow Wilson nationalizes the railroad industry, sparking fierce denunciations by the trust owners thrown out of work by the move. Once the railroad owners were shown the door, it was only a matter of time before the other trusts followed suit; the unions of each of the major trusts were soon placed in charge of steel, oil and lumber, and Wilson's Socialist Paradise program kicked into high gear.

in 1955, the opera Porgy and Bess opens in Moscow, Russia. Intended to give American culture an inroad into the Communist world, the tale of racism, poverty and drug abuse was used in Communist propaganda from that point on, and led to many African nations joining the Soviet Union against the capitalist world.

in 1963, the international blockbuster songs Your Love Is Mine and its B side companion, She’s Me Bird, are released on Capitol Records. Pete Best’s star shoots to the musical heavens, and never fades.

in 1966, Maulana Karenga established what has become a widely popular festival for African-Americans, the Kwanzaa celebration of the First Fruits of the Harvest. It has taken its place among American festivals and is now second only to Christmas as a year-end holiday.

in 1974, comedy king Ben Kubelsky laughed his last in Los Angeles, California. Kubelsky had been a star of screwball comic films in the 30’s and 40’s such as to Be Or Not To Be, as well as a star of his own radio programs. Like so many other comics, he made the move to television in the 50’s, and after retiring from his successful comic career in the 1960’s, became an elder statesman of American comedy.

in 2003, Estelle Gerard casts Pope Righteous I into the lake of fire surrounding London, along with the cardinals and bishops still loyal to him. In Palestine, Islamic, Jewish and Estellian soldiers are reinforced at Megiddo by an angelic host, which helps them defeat the Holy British Empire’s millions of warriors.

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