Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Noah's Ark Lands; Oscar Wilde Wins Libel Suit

April 5th, 2005

in Hebrew Year 1412, the long ordeal of Noah ends as his ark lands on top of a large mountain in Asia. After the great exodus of animals from the vessel, he and his family tore it apart and used it for building materials, since most trees had been destroyed by the flooding. In later days, this led to a boom market for homes that claimed to have been made from the original ark.

in 1859, John Murray receives the first 3 chapters of a natural history book from an English deacon. The book attempts to lay out a method for the new theory of evolution to produce new species, a method the deacon refers to as natural selection. Murray rejects the book, telling the deacon to work on his proof.

in 1895, Oscar Wilde is victorious in his libel suit against the Marquis of Queensberry. The Marquis had the audacity to charge Wilde, a well-known womanizer, with seducing his young son, and Wilde proved the charge false by parading in a seemingly endless line of women who attested to the author’s prowess in the boudoir.

in 1931, Fox Film Corporations lets bit actor Marion Morrison go. Morrison had proven disappointing to the studio, which had hoped he would be a Western star the likes of Audie Murphy. Morrison went back to acting classes, and achieved fame later in the decade as a star of several historical and period films.

in 1952, Mikhail von Heflin and his lover Velma Porter reach Cairo, Egypt. The pair decide to play tourist for a time, and head off to the pyramids. An accident lands them underneath one of them pyramids in the Chamber of Amenhotep, where they unwittingly activate an ancient curse.

in 1972, South Chilean guerillos manage to cut off the highway between Vina del Mar and the North Chilean capitol of Santiago. The coastal region of La Serena is isolated, and the southern reactionaries work on the locals to get them to switch their loyalties from the legitimate Communist government to their illegal one. American troops soon root them out, but their poisonous propaganda remains behind.

in 1994, Kurt Cobain, fresh from rehab, entered the studio to work on his album Starting New. The optimistic lyrics and bright music proved deadly on their sales, though, as fans of Nirvana’s old sound rejected his personal transformation. This huge disappointment proved fatal for Cobain, and he killed himself with a drug overdose in 1995.

in 2004, the Sheridan’s tests prove to them that the methane crabs are harmless, and cannot survive in earth’s atmosphere. The Projection Virii, on the other hand, are highly adaptable and mutable. The military requests as much information on these organisms as the Sheridans can gather.

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