Lunar Explosion; The Martians Move In

June 18th, 2004

in 1178, an explosion is seen on the moon by 5 Canterbury monks. Believing that this heralds the end of the world, they flee the monastery and exhort all about them to pray for deliverance. Within a week, all of England is paralyzed with fear of the end, and mass suicides begin happening across the country.

in 3874, Emperor Xiaozong Shen saw a star attack the moon, and the moon glow as bright as day for a moment. This vision seized him, and he summoned his royal astronomers. “Bend all your will towards getting us there,” he told them, pointing at the moon. “The Heavens must be ours.” It took over 700 years, but the vision of the emperors never wavered. Even as they controlled the earth, they knew that their destiny lay among the heavens.

in 556, a group of shepherds saw Allah smite the moon with a stone from his sling. They immediately ran to their Caliph and told him what they had seen, and he pondered the meaning of this for many days. He then sent messengers to other Caliphs, and they agreed that Allah was telling them that moon-worshipers would not enter paradise. A sense of responsibility for the men around them required them to strike out and convert all the pagans to the true worship of Allah.

in 1776, Tlamsita’s Congress of Nations gains its first members as both the North American Confederation and the Sioux Nation agree to join. By the end of the month, all of the western hemisphere has at least agreed to talks on the organization.

in 1815, Napoleon defeated the allied forces of Britain, Belgium, Germany and Holland in the battle of Waterloo, in Belgium. The emperor’s defeat of the Duke of Wellington and Gebhard Leberecht von Blücher, commander of the Prussian forces, was so crushing that the Austrian and Russian armies, arriving late to the battle, immediately retreated to their respective countries on seeing the carnage. France continued to dominate the continent until the emperor’s death in 1821.

in 1921, Thomas Edison unveils his latest invention; an electric car. The Jove can run for over 100 miles between recharges, and can achieve speeds of up to 35 miles per hour. Edison begins working with dozens of cities to establish public recharge stations for the Joves; (with power supplied by Edison Electric, of course).

in 1940, Winston Churchill gave what would be his last speech on British soil, urging his countrymen that this would be “our finest hour” as Nazi bombardments intensified. It was a lost cause, though, and the government soon evacuated Britain.

in 4648, Emperor Dao-Ming of the Chinese Empire of Earth met Ambassador Ko’cho Lmota of the Chdo Democracy. Dao wept openly at the fulfillment of his ancestors’ dreams.

in 1953, the Boston Red Stockings established a professional Town Ball record by clubbing in 17 homers in one inning to defeat the Detroit Panthers 23-3.

in 1961, the long-running western Gunsmoke aired for the last time on the radio before moving to television. When viewers saw star William Conrad reprise his role from the radio show, they were less than impressed, and the television series ended after one season.

in 2003, Martian invaders attacked Alaska, northern Canada and northern Russia. The few people living in these areas fled south with horrifying stories of ten-foot tall monsters that breathed fire and could take a gunshot directly to the chest without even slowing down. Panic grips the world.