Tuesday, June 15, 2004

Magna Carta Signed In Holy British Empire

June 15th, 2004

in 1225, Pope John of the Holy British Empire signed the Magna Carta, guaranteeing the rights of all British citizens. This move is universally opposed by his bishops and cardinals, leading to the first of many rebellions against his Holiness.

in the 60th year of Tutankhara’s reign, a land was discovered across the Western Ocean. The new steam-powered vessels of the Pharaoh were able to cross the vast expanse of the ocean in mere weeks, making all the old tales about the Western Ocean hiding the home of the gods a lie. The Oeztecan Empire that was found there immediately saw the advantage of trade with the east, and a long partnership was begun between the two mighty people.

in 1802, Virginian farmer George Washington is elected to serve as First Chancellor of the North American Confederation. He serves for two terms, and is succeeded by his Iroquois Second Chancellor, Onatah.

in 4561, the first of many disastrous sorties was made by the rebels in Hanoi. The waiting Chinese army destroyed a thousand men before the rebels could make their way back within the city. On this day, also, a peace envoy was sent out to begin negotiating with the Chinese. Although they struggled heroically, they would ultimately prove unsuccessful.

in 1949, Oscar-winning tragic actor Jim Varney was born in Kentucky. He rose to national prominence playing Evan Earp, a descendant of Wyatt Earp’s on the dramatic TV series, The Rousters. This was followed by his first Oscar-worthy performance in the film Hey, Vern, It’s Ernest. He also won a Tony for his performance as King Lear the year of his death, in 2000.

in 1956, John Lennon asked Paul McCartney to join his band, The Quarrymen. They would have been another unremarkable teenage rock band, except that 4 years later, their drummer was international superstar, Pete Best.

in 1990, Pete Best’s final album before his death was released. Fool In Love sold 1 million copies in its first week, proving the old man still had plenty of fans left.

in 2003, the UN attempted to contact the Martian fleet orbiting earth, but was met only with an eerie series of beeps and squeals.


Tohoscope said...

But wasn't Pete Best assassinated?

Anonymous said...

That was probably in a different dimension.

Anonymous said...

But what of Mick Jagger and Brian Jones who, after the death of Keith Richard from a drug overdose, went on to write and record such wonderful songs and with their band The Rolling Stone Blues Combo, kept the magic of the old African Blues music alive. They often visited Narobi which was considered the home of the blues, and recorded with such greats as Mtome Charles Berry.

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