Fascist Control Act

August 24th, 2004

in 832 AUC, Vesuvius begins spewing smoke and small streams of lava. Alarmed by this, the citizens of Pompeii and Herculaneum flee the region. This turns out to be a wise move, because Vesuvius erupts the next day, burying the two cities.

in 1572, Pope Charles IX orders the Protestant city of Rouen destroyed. The Protestant leader Alexander Martine had called for popular election of cardinals throughout the Holy British Empire, and this angered Charles so much that he called out the Templars to crush Martine’s home. Thousands died in the purge.

in 1853, Chef George Crum of Saratoga Springs, New York, created a side dish he called the potato chip. It was a thin slice of potato, fried and salted, made especially for a customer who complained that Crum’s fried potatoes were too thick for him. While this one customer enjoyed the dish, it never caught on with the general public.

in 1890, Thomas Edison patents the motion picture camera, and begins a studio for recording plays on film. The studio, Dynamic Pictures, dominates the movie industry well into the middle of the next century.

in 1950, thousands of Jews escape to Yemen from territory conquered by the New Reich. This has the unfortunate consequence of bringing Nazi attacks on their Arab brothers; Islam mobilizes against the New Reich after Nazis take and desecrate Mecca.

in 1954, the Fascist Control Act passes Congress after rabidly anti-capitalist Senator Ted Astley from Washington denounced anyone who “has in any way participated in the activities, planning, actions, objectives or purposes of fascism.” For several years, Astley’s brand of anti-fascism held sway in the capital, ruining the lives of many good people who had been tempted by right-wing philosophy.

in 1955, Pascal-Edison rolled out its new operating system for the Univac series of Eddies, OS 55. The new system featured a dazzling vocal interface and artificial intelligence-created response. It became the best-selling difference engine program in history.

in 2003, Jacob Sheridan’s fleet and the incoming Martian fleet meet in battle; Sheridan’s ships firing the nanobot virus at the Martians. The battle lasts for a few hours, but the earth forces are victorious at the end. One Martian ship does manage to make it through the line to head to earth, though.