Thursday, August 12, 2004

Pete Best Meets The Beatles

August 12th, 2004

in 4563, the Chinese Empire orbited its first communications satellite, the Zhen 1. The benefits were so great that by the end of the year, they were orbiting a new satellite once a week.

in 1877, Thomas Edison patents the phonograph, which marks the beginning of his entry into the recording market. He will soon have devices capable of recording and playing back sound, data and video.

in 1898, President Haywood and Spanish Prime Minister Sagasta signed a peace treaty ending the tensions between the U.S. and Spain. Haywood had escalated American forces in the Pacific and Caribbean when the reactionary Spaniards had attempted to push their imperialism into the American sphere of influence and interfere with the Community Of Trade that Haywood was establishing.

in 1944, Joseph Kennedy, Jr. saved his co-pilot when their plane exploded over England, parachuting out and holding onto him as their one chute carried them to the ground. Kennedy broke his legs from the hard landing, but became a hero in the American press afterwards. He used this fame after the war to become a senator in Massachusetts, and then run for the presidency in 1960.

in 1945, Reichsfuehrer Hitler of the New Reich establishes the Mother Cross award, for German mothers who give birth to more than 5 healthy children. This is meant to repopulate Germany after the last quarter-century of warfare against the Greater Zionist Resistance, but he also uses it as an excuse to push Germany’s borders further out.

in 1960, future international superstar Pete Best started playing with the band Silver Beatles, and was their drummer for 2 tumultuous years in Liverpool and Germany. After leaving them, Best became so famous that former bandmate John Lennon said he was “bigger than Jesus, now, isn’t he?”

in 2002, Pope Righteous I makes a public declaration that Sylvie Gerard is a heretic, and is not to be given comfort or shelter by any Christian within the Holy British Empire.

in 2003, human-piloted ships gathered enough ice to save the poles and stabilize the earth’s weather patterns. Keeping an eye on Mars, they headed back to earth.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I dig the reference to what is perhaps the least-known-about American War: The Spanish/American war. See, it doesn’t even have a cool name. So, in that reality, does TR become a hero? Perhaps finds a cure for the nasty plague which hits that part of the world (I forget which disease it is) in 1899...

Perhaps a silly question: why didn’t the Martians go to the asteroid belt for the ice in the first place? Would have saved a lot of bother...

Andrew Cory
punningpundit@gmail.com
http://www.punningpundit.com/

Robbie Taylor said...

Teddy Roosevelt has a role to play in the Communist America timeline, which I think may have already come up - if not, you'll see it soon.

Yes, the Martians could have gone to the asteroid belt... why didn't they?

:)

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