July 2nd, 2005
in 1839, the Amistad, a Cuban slave ship, was overcome by the Africans aboard and pointed back towards Africa. Although the 2 Cubans left alive to steer the vessel had started pointing the ship north towards American waters, they were quickly found out by an African who knew the position of the stars, and the ship eventually made it back to their motherland, inspiring many other slave revolts on the lucrative slave trade.
in 1862, after terrorist Brent Carpenter is found guilty of 68 murders, he is led from the courtroom to police transport waiting to take him to jail. Once he is locked in the vehicle and it moves away, a huge explosion rocks the street; Carpenter, 3 police officers and 4 civilians on the street are killed, and a score of people are wounded. The Human League immediately takes credit for the bombing, declaring that its members would die before serving a single day in prison.
in 4561, fighting in Hanoi eases for a day as both sides attempt to recover from the terrible battle of the day before. Lord Truo Vo, cousin to the slain Prince of the city, rallies his people in the southern districts. He orders every child that can be sent out through the tunnels under the city, along with as many women as will leave. He also sends an emissary to the Chinese to ask for safe passage of the wounded, ill and aged. General Zuo later said of his reply, “I was surrounded by blood and death; how could I be expected to give an honorable response in such a state?” Zuo refused safe passage, and thousands died over the next few days that need not have.
in 1890, Congress narrowly defeats a measure sponsored by Senator John Sherman to prohibit trusts and monopolies. This paved the way for the eventual merger of all U.S. corporations in 1921 to form US GlobalCorp. From multimillion-dollar highway networks to the biscuits on your table, everything’s done better by US GlobalCorp!
in 1947, a small glowing disk crashed into the desert outside of the small town of Roswell, New Mexico. The crash is heard by a nearby rancher, Mac Brazel. He decides against investigating the noise this evening, instead choosing to wait for the next day.
in 1978, Lynette Fromme, a former hippie from California, attempted to murder President Nixon. Obviously insane, she claimed in her trial that the President had committed some sort of crime in the election of 1972 and was supposed to have resigned. She was found guilty and remanded to an insane asylum for life. President Nixon was reported to have said of her, “Crazy drugged-out hippies. That’s what they get for messing with Nixon.”
in 1981, the Vegas 6 find a large number of people wandering around in the desert outside Las Vegas; they all turn out to be people that Mobius had entranced. By following their trail, they are able to find Mobius’ lair and the villain himself, comatose inside. Warp Drive rushes him to the Sisters of Mercy hospital, where he is given the serum to cure him. Now, the heroes gather together to decide what can be done with their arch-nemesis.
in 1991, Axl Rose of the grunge metal group Guns ‘n’ Roses is killed when he sparks a riot by leaping into the crowd at a concert in St. Louis and attacking a fan who is videotaping his performance. The death of the notoriously hot-headed Rose closes the chapter on his musical style, as well; softer, gentler music makes a dramatic comeback in the 90’s.
in 2004, Jacob and Livinia Sheridan run into the modified Titanian methane crabs of rogue physicist Damien Moore. In order to save the scientists, Prime Minister Howard draws the nano-bots away while they attempt to coordinate their own nano-bots in order to save Australia from a second invasion of illusory dangers. During the diversion, Howard falls off a cliff; the Sheridans are forced to abandon him in order to save Australia.
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2 comments:
That's because the nano-crabs know not to mess with Nixon.
Prime Minister Howard used the 'methane crab scare' to create a state of panic and ensure a record fifth term in office. His fall from the cliff was widely seen by many Australians as a ruse, something akin to the 'drowning' of Prime Minister Holt in 1972 who had in fact escaped to China before his status as a deep mole was unmmasked by journalists working for The Notional Times.
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