Tuesday, July 05, 2005

G.B. Shaw Quits; The Black Stockings

July 5th, 2005

in 1687, Englishman Sir Isaac Newton publishes a treatise on mathematics, Philosophiae naturalis principia mathematica, which is immediately criticized by the scientific community of his native land. Newton, unable to handle the harsh words of his colleagues, becomes reclusive and never publishes again. Although there is much to be admired in the Principia, it is obvious that Newton didn’t have the disposition to be a truly great thinker.

in 4561, fighting resumes in Hanoi. Chinese General Zuo simply begins blowing up buildings to get them out of his way; no civilians are left in the city at this point, and he is impatient to end this conflict. Lord Vo and General Pham argue about abandoning the city, punching a hole through the Chinese line, and escaping into the jungles to harass the Chinese. Lord Vo wins the argument, saying, “We are not bandits who stab in the dark and run for cover from an honest fight. We are warriors, and we will end this as warriors.”

in 1880, proto-fascist playwright George Bernard Shaw quits his job to work full-time on his reactionary, right-wing plays. Over the next few years, he produces such works as Man & Superman - Nietzsche’s treatise in theatrical form; Arms & The Man - a cry for compulsory military service in Britain; and Pygmalion - a celebration of the abuses of capitalism, the degradation of women and the evils of poverty. Hitler claimed Shaw as one of his greatest inspirations, and when he conquered Britain in the 40’s, he gave Shaw the Iron Cross, which Shaw wore proudly until his death in 1950.

in 1910, with the defeat of the Jovian attack on the earth, Congress of Nations ships take control of the moons as well as the Mlosh home system. Although the Q’Bar are mostly transplanted to the Kantar system, some have remained behind, and the C.N. grants them asylum in the system that has always been their home.

in 1921, The Chicago Town Ball club, known as the White Stockings, is accused of deliberately losing the World Series against the Cincinnati Browns and put on trial. In a sham trial, the players are acquitted when their signed confessions mysteriously disappear. One good result came of it; the new Commissioner of Town Ball appointed by the team owners to ensure this never happened again. After listening to the trial and the players’ complaints about Charles Comiskey, Commissioner Kennisaw Mountain Landis banned Comiskey from Town Ball for life. Comiskey was forced to sell his team; the city of Chicago bought it, and the Stocks have been a community club ever since.

in 1925, Dynamic Pictures releases it’s second talkie, Birth Of A Nation, directed by German √©migr√© Leni Riefenstahl and starring Carla Lambert. It is just as hot at the box office as The Sounds of the Night, although a few critics are bothered by the overtly racist and anti-Semitic tone of the film.

in 1933, the Greater Zionist Resistance passes the Law of Return, granting any Jew in the world the right to emigrate and live in lands controlled by the GZR. This has the added benefit of increasing the pool from which they can draw resistance fighters.

in 1981, arch-villain Mobius and the Vegas 6 decide to pay a visit to the Groom Lake Military Complex – better known as Area 51. They want answers to what is happening to them, and possibly even a cure, because Mobius has shown them that their condition is destroying their bodies; according to him, they will be dead within a year, unless they can find something to stop the progression of the genetically-engineered virus.

in 2002, the Comte de St. Germaine, wielding the Holy Grail itself, demands that the College of Cardinals remove Pope William VI from office and install him. It is obvious that the Grail does not reject him; he is able to drink from it, and suffer no ill effects. The Cardinals, fearing the wrath of God if they refuse, agree to his demands and install St. Germaine as Pope of the Holy British Empire.


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2 comments:

Cinlef said...

Can we have some timlines about Canadian history.MY country's history could have gone vary differently,if the Plains of Abraham had gone the other way North America would be Francophone and the USA would not exist.Just asking
Cinlef

Robbie Taylor said...

If I can find a good source for Canadian history - other than my friends from Toronto and Quebec - I will definitely add it in!

TIAH Editor says we'd like to move you off the blog, if you're browsing the archives - and most people are - more than half of them are already on the new site. We need to be sure the new web site accomodates your archive browsing needs because we don't want to lose any readers. Please supply any feedback or comments by email to the Editor and please note the blogger site is shutting on December 1st.