Mozart's Magic Ship Produced; Meet The Flagstones

September 30th, 2004

in 856, the newly-invented printing presses of Baghdad produce the first machine-made copies of the Koran. The faithful need no longer puzzle out mistakes of handwriting; all versions of the holiest book of Islam are invariant from this point on.

in 1791, the Mozart opera Das Zauberschiff, (The Magic Ship), is produced in Vienna to great acclaim. Starring the great Mlosh tenor Zzetz’j’li, the opera tells the story of a young Mlosh boy’s journey to an alien world where he finds his one true love.

in 1924, Truman Persons was born in New Orleans, Louisiana. A flamboyant homosexual activist, he spearheaded homosexual rights movements in the 50’s and 60’s, famously declaring, “I refuse to be labeled a criminal because of who I love.” Persons was lynched by Ku Klux Klansmen in 1968 after he had begun speaking out for the rights of African-Americans throughout the south.

in 1934, Semitic-African Resistance leader Elie Wiesel is born in Romania, a territory still under the control of the Greater Zionist Resistance. When, during his youth, the GZR was forced into retreat, he and his parents escaped to the United States. Unfortunately, he saw the hatred of the New Reich follow him to that country, and he joined the Semitic-African Resistance in order to halt the spread of fascism because, “To remain passive and indifferent would have been the greatest sin of all.” He became one of the movement’s most forceful organizers and leaders, and was able to convince many heads of state to allow non-Aryans safety within their countries.

in 1935, George Gershwin’s great light opera about the plight of working African-Americans under capitalism premiered in New York City. Porgy and Bess took the American musical scene by storm, and is a staple of light opera companies around the world.

in the Dreaming, Bamapana descended from the Backbone of the Night to tell the People of his new game, and teach it to them. The game revolved around the tossing of a stick from one player to another, who must catch and carry it without using his hands, and then drop it into a basket to score a point. When Bamapana played it, of course, there was much foul language, and players still use it to this day to honor him.

in 1960, the first animated series to appear in prime-time, The Flagstones, appeared on this evening on ABC. The show about cavemen leading surprisingly modern lives among dinosaurs and other prehistoric creatures was a ratings hit for the network, even if the critics detested it. It lasted 9 seasons and gave birth to a generation of American animation.

in 4697, a Chinese colonist on Feng-huang sees something crash outside his dome and goes to investigate. The Y’T’T’li debris seizes him and takes control of his body. This poor man’s body is used to establish communication with other Y’T’T’li units and form a front against the Chinese on Feng-huang.

Pope Richard II Resigns; Gathering Moss' 1st Tour

September 29th, 2004

in 1399, Pope Richard II of the Holy British Empire became the first of the British Popes to resign from office. He was replaced by his cousin Henry, Bishop of Bolingbroke, who had often persecuted Richard’s supporters. This precipitated nearly a century of war between the Lancastrian branch and the Yorkist branch of the Plantagenet Popes.

in 1758, pilot Horatio Nelson was born in Burnham Thorpe, United Kingdom. Even as a child, Nelson had an affinity for the Mlosh aerial ship designs, and became a pilot in His Majesty’s Air Corps. Nelson was the first British man to leave the solar system.

in 1829, Scotland Yard is formed, paradoxically, in London. An investigative wing of His Majesty’s police force, the Yard is instrumental in solving many crimes during the middle of the century. After its failure to solve the infamous Jack the Ripper cases, though, it is reorganized as the Royal Ministry of Investigation under Lord Reginald Townshend.

in 1907, Orvon Autry was born in the small town of Tioga, Texas. He moved to New Jersey as an adult and, since he had been a cowboy in Texas, performed in many of Dynamic Pictures’ westerns. He was the comic foil in Plainsgirl opposite Carla Lambert.

in 1916, capitalist counter-revolutionary John Rockefeller used his vast, ill-gotten wealth to leave the then-United States of America for the United Kingdom. “A businessman can no longer thrive in the communist environment of the United States,” Rockefeller said in the press conference announcing his defection. Socialist President Woodrow Wilson denounced Rockefeller’s reactionary statement and froze all of Rockefeller’s assets still in the U.S.

in 1963, the Moss go on their first tour, as an opening act for Buddy Holly and Bo Diddley. Programs and fliers mentioning the opening act of this tour, the Gathering Moss, are worth a fortune on ebay today.

in 1969, scientist Erika Eleniak was born in Glendale, California. The child of a Ukrainian immigrant who had moved to Hollywood to be an actor, Eleniak was saved from a life of drug abuse in high school by a teacher who showed her that science could give her a better high than any drug. After getting degrees in astronomy and physics, she became well-known as a popularizer of science with her television series, How Do They Do That?.

in 4697, Admiral Wu’s sihps detect new activity happening in the asteroid belt. Unwilling to wait to see what the Y’T’T’li have in store for humanity, Wu orders his ships to begin bombardment of the belt with outlying asteroids. The chaos of the next few days allows some Y’T’T’li ships to escape Wu’s blockade.

Marx Dies In Los Angeles

September 28th, 2004

in 11-16-2-16-11, explorer Itzapoca sails into the harbor of Gibraltar, the first landing of a Oueztecan on European shores. While Itzapoca claims to the natives that he is a god, they are able to drive him off with ease. This makes Europe safe from the Oueztecans for many decades.

in 1780, Mlosh actor Tan’Ji’Ket delivers the first performance to be broadcast across the Mlosh-built Entertainment Wave in Europe. The E.W. quickly becomes the most popular way to spend one’s leisure time in the world, with various broadcasters developing local talent to showcase, or rebroadcasting international shows.

in 1909, Alfred Caplin was born in New Haven, Connecticut. Caplin was the artist who created the syndicated comic strip Colonel Gilfeather at 19, making him the youngest professional cartoonist in the country. In spite of Caplin’s boredom with the strip, it became financially impossible for him to move on to other projects, and he spent the rest of his life drawing a cartoon he didn’t enjoy himself.

in 4608, the Japanese sailing vessel Kiche Maru, with over 1000 people on board, is saved by the Chinese Imperial Fleet after they begin to take on water. While several Fleet ships took the passengers off, Captain Hong of his majesty’s ship Chen Wei manages to tow the vessel to a safe landing. For his act of heroism, Hong is decorated by the Emperor himself.

in 1915, time-traveling neo-Nazi Astrid Pflaume positions several operatives throughout Europe, in strategic positions to prolong the World War. She takes great pains to train them well, so that they will be able to recruit other Jewish people into her Greater Zionist Resistance.

in 1938, rhythm & blues singer Ben Nelson was born in Henderson, North Carolina. After he moved to Harlem, Nelson became a member of a street corner doo-wop group called The Four B’s. The young men became a great success, but their greatest hit was Nelson’s solo Stand By Me on their album There Goes My Baby.

in 1964, concert harpist Adolph Marx, a genius that some considered the finest classical musician in the Soviet States of America, died in Los Angeles, California. Marx single-handedly made harp music popular in the Soviet States during the 30’s and 40’s, and continued to fill concert halls up to his death.

in 1978, Cardinal Albino Luciani of Belluno uncovered a plot by the Comte de Saint-Germaine to acquire ancient relics of the Church in order to further some strange occult ends of his own. Before he could communicate this information to anyone, he died of a heart attack in his mansion.

Estelle Gerard Provides Message Of Hope

September 27th, 2004

in 3986, an earthquake in the Gulf of Chili is the source of a new set of regulations from the Emperor about housing construction. 100,000 died during that earthquake because so many houses were not built well. After the lesson of this earthquake, fewer buildings collapsed in subsequent ones, saving countless lives.

in 1821, Mexico asks for admittance into the North American Confederation. After making a few concessions such as allowing democratic government, they are brought in, doubling the size of the Confederation.

in 1869, the sheriff of Hays City, Kansas, sparked a riot by shooting the instigator of a bar brawl in the head. Friends of the brawler attacked the sheriff, James Hickok, and his deputy, who barely escaped with their lives. Most of Hays City was burned to the ground before Hickok, with the aid of several hastily-deputized assistants, could restore order. “Wild Bill” Hickok was never allowed to occupy another public office after that disaster.

in 1960, Comrade Sylvia Pankhurst died in Walla Walla, Washington. Comrade Pankhurst was a strong advocate of socialism and women’s suffrage in her native England, but the reactionaries in that country forced her into exile in the Soviet States of America, where she was welcomed as a comrade-in-arms of the revolution.

in 1962, Robert Zimmerman’s career took a nose-dive when, after a performance at Carnegie Hall, the Rolling Stone declared him, “a folk stylist indistinguishable from the rest.” Zimmerman’s next album failed to sell more than 1000 copies, and he was dropped from his label. In spite of his early promise, he ended up, like so many other folk singers, returning to life outside of music.

in 1988, tests on the infamous Shroud of Turin show that blood is indeed part of the image that is faintly painted on the cloth. That blood does not test as human; indeed, it matches no known animal type on earth. This mixed message is met with confusion by the religious community, and the Catholic Church allows a larger sampling of the cloth to be used by the scientists. After months of testing, the blood is announced to be extraterrestrial in origin. The results are immediately denounced by all Christian organizations.

in 2001, Friedrich Leibacher entered the state parliament building in Zug, Switzerland, and killed 14 people, wounding a dozen others, with a high-powered automatic rifle and small explosives. This incident led to the nation, once the most gun-friendly nation in Europe, to adopt harder gun laws, such as the banning of private ownership for assault rifles.

in 2003, Estelle Gerard resurfaces in Stratford, England, and speaks to hundreds in the village square of the coming day of hope; “I know how hard you’ve worked, and how patient you’ve been, and how you can’t stand the bad men. Remember where you come from, and apologize for your own wrongs, and I and my Father will be with you soon.”

1st Televised Presidential Debate

September 26th, 2004

in 1774, Jonathan Chapman, known by the popular name Johnny Appleseed, was born in Leominster, Massachusetts. Even as a young man, Chapman had a love for growing things, and this served him in good stead when he was made the longest-serving Minister of Agriculture for the North American Confederation. He served from 1811-1836.

in 1235, Isvar Chandra Vidyasagar, one of the most beautiful writers in the Hindi language, was born in Birsingha in the Caliphate of Midnapore. Although his writings skirted blasphemy of the Prophet, his work was so beautiful that he was not only allowed to keep his head, but the Caliph made him a court poet.

in 1889, German philosopher Martin Heidegger was born in Messkirch, Germany. Heidegger was one of the most vocal of Richard Tolman’s followers, and wrote many papers on the subject of parallel universes crossing over into our own. Heidegger disappeared mysteriously in 1941.

in 1960, Comrade President Joel Rosenberg and Socialist candidate Lyndon Johnson of Texas engage in the first televised presidential debate. Johnson appeared distinctly uncomfortable with the cameras, where the Comrade President, who had been in front of cameras for years, appeared very relaxed. On substance, they were evenly matched, but on appearance, Comrade Rosenberg scored an easy win, just as when he carried the polls in November.

in 1965, famed musician Pete Best was decorated by the Queen with the Order of the British Empire. Her son, Prince Charles, was a huge fan of Best’s music, and Best recalled later that Charles had behaved as if Best were the royalty.

in 1975, the gender-bending sendup of 1950’s B-Movies, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, rocketed into American theaters. The outrageous farce blew away American cultural mores and made fish-net stockings very popular. In spite of (or perhaps because of) numerous protests by religious groups across the country, the film made $90 million at the box office.

in 1986, the prime-time soap opera Dallas aired an episode in which the supposedly-dead Bobby Ewing was shown showering in Pam Ewing’s bathroom. The series took a turn into the paranormal after this, and in its last season, incorporated such disparate elements as parallel universes and oil company takeovers. This confused not only the critics, but the viewers, who turned the series off in droves.

in 4697, scanners on the moon Hun-Dun detected ships coming towards them and alerted the Star Fleet and earth. By the end of the day, there were no more transmissions from Hun-Dun. The counter-attack launched by Admiral Wu proved strong enough to push the Y’T’T’li back into the asteroid belt, but they were impossible to dislodge from there. Wu formed a blockade around the asteroids and the Fleet’s command contemplated their next move.

Battle At Stamford Bridge

September 25th, 2004

in 1066, at Stamford Bridge, Norwegians slaughter the forces of Saxon King Harold and move southwest to assume control of most of the Saxon lands of England. They, in turn, are swept back across England by Norman forces invading from the continent a few days later.

in 1913, Dynamic Pictures scores another coup by signing comic film star Charlie Chaplin to an exclusive deal. Chaplin, possibly the finest comic talent in silent film, stars in and produces over 80 films for Edison’s company.

in 1919, President Woodrow Wilson collapsed and died of a stroke while on a speaking tour to tout the League of Nations. His vice-president, Thomas Marshall, is sworn in as the 29th President of the United States of America.

in 1942, the Greater Zionist Resistance manages to turn the tide temporarily against the German Underground. Hitler’s men are defeated soundly in Norway and the GZR keeps them out of the country for 6 months; long enough for many Jewish families to escape the clutches of the GU.

in 1952, quintessential action hero Christopher Reeve was born in New York City. Although classically trained at the prestigious Julliard School of Performing Arts, he made his name mainly in popular hero movies, such as 1978’s Superman and its sequels, 1987’s The Running Man and Rambo, and 1990’s Total Recall.

in 1967, international superstar Pete Best recorded his wonderfully evocative song, Jester, about the pangs of love and life. The song went platinum in its first week of release.

in 1981, the first woman justice took her seat on the People’s Supreme Court of the Soviet States of America. Comrade Justice Shirley Chisholm had long been a champion of the people in her native New York, and continues the fight on the people’s highest court.

in 4697, the Star Fleet was forced to retreat from the asteroid belt. Although they had inflicted immense casualties on the Y’T’T’li, over half of their own vessels were destroyed in the conflict. Colonists on the outer planets and moons began to assemble what defenses they could, and the entire system prayed to the gods for assistance.

Ruth's Farewell To Town Ball; Eisenhower's Heart Attack

September 24th, 2004

in 1789, the standardized electronic mailing system is born in North America, when Mlosh messaging technology is married to the human postal system. Electric Letters, or ELs, become a common part of life throughout North America, and the system reaches around the world by the end of the 18th century.

in 1257, the Sultan of Brunei gave freedom to the people of Sarawak, in Malaysia. The Malay people there had been rebelling against the corruption of the Sultan’s appointed rulers, and he didn’t feel inclined to expend soldiers and treasure upon them. Sarawak still remains a small, but proudly independent, nation within the brotherhood of Islam.

in 1896, war hero F. Scott Fitzgerald was born in St. Paul, Minnesota. He volunteered for the Army during World War I, and was sent to France in 1916, where he single-handedly held off a German battalion and a German tank while his own unit was cut down around him. Although he was wounded mortally, he refused attention until the rest of his men were treated; a fatal mistake, but one that earned him the Medal of Honor, posthumously.

in 1934, revolutionary author John Brunner was born in Preston Crowmarsh, Oxfordshire, in England. The left-wing activist felt out of place in his native land, and moved to the Soviet States of America in 1957, where he produced brilliant works of speculative fiction that showed the socialist world to come.

in 1934, Herman Ruth played his last game of Town Ball with the New York Metros. The Metros were obviously too distraught at their hero’s departure to pay much attention to the game; they lost to the Boston Pilgrims, 5-0.

in 1946, Albert Einstein, noted scientist, published an article in the New York Times about supposed incidents where people from parallel universes had allegedly appeared in ours. “While theoretically possible, there is no proof of parallel universes, in spite of the insistence of the Tolman crowd,” Einstein wrote, dismissively. In spite of this high-level dismissal, many of the followers of Richard Tolman’s parallel universe theories continued to watch for breaks in the universal fabric.

in 1955, President Eisenhower suffers a fatal heart attack while on vacation in Denver, and Vice-President Richard Nixon is given the oath of office in Sacramento, where he had been visiting his old colleagues. Nixon is much less popular than Ike had been, and doesn’t even manage to capture the Republican nomination for the presidency the next year; the Republicans nominate Senator Robert Taft, who is defeated by Democrat Adlai Stevenson.

in 4697, within the asteroid belt, Star Fleet ships find a veritable Y’T’T’li colony; hundreds of ships and strange metal beings have been created from the raw material of the belt. Most of them are not of a military nature, and the Fleet destroys them quickly. After this initial success, though, they encountered the Y’T’T’li military vessels, and the worst battle in the Fleet’s history begins.

Nixon's "Checkers" Speech

September 23rd, 2004

in Hellenic Year 3281, the statesman/warrior Euripides was born in Salamis, during the great battle in which the Hellans defeated the Persians. The event proved to be destiny for Euripides, for he followed the path of war throughout his life, rising to lead Athens in battle against Sparta during its wars for freedom.

in 1122, the Concordat of Cornwall established that the Pope or his representatives would name the clergy in any Christian country. Pope Henry I of the Holy British Empire and Prince Callistus of Italy had been in a struggle over this issue for years, and Henry finally beat the prince down.

in 1780, British spy John Andre narrowly avoided capture by the rebellious colonials of America, this preserving the secret he carried. After Andre reached Lord Cornwallis with the terms under which rebel General Benedict Arnold would surrender West Point, an agreement was reached, Arnold went over to the King’s men, and the rebellion was crushed.

in 1912, Thomas Edison’s Dynamic Pictures releases the first of Mack Sennett’s Keystone Comedies, about the hilarious misadventures of a precinct of incompetent police officers. The comedies make a star of Sennett, and millions for Dynamic.

in 1920, famed comic actor Joe Yule, Jr. was born in Brooklyn, New York. Yule started acting in films as a young child, first appearing in silent pictures in the 20’s before landing such roles as Andy Hardy in his teens, opposite girl sensation Frances Gumm.

in 1952, Senator Richard Nixon of California, who had been accused of accepting inappropriate gifts, gave a speech in which he declared that his dog, Checkers, had been the only gift he had ever accepted while in office. The ridicule that fell on Nixon after this caused Eisenhower to drop him from the vice-presidential spot on the Republican ticket and replace him with Senator Joe McCarthy of Wisconsin. Adlai Stevenson easily defeated Eisenhower after this debacle.

in 1986, Congress declared the rose, long a symbol of socialism, to be the official flower of the Soviet States of America.

in 4697, asteroid gatherers in the asteroid belt near Feng-huang send out a distress signal. Admiral Wu orders all Star Fleet vessels within the system to descend on the asteroid belt and prepare for battle.

The 3 Papacies; Punk Singer Debby Boone Born

September 22nd, 2004

in 1283 AUC, the minority religion known as Catholicism splits into 3 factions, all of whom hate each other more than they hate the Romans. Power struggles between the 3 Papacies kill off most of their followers, and a few Romans, as well. The Empire does its best to quell their hatred, but many in the Senate are more than willing to let the Catholics kill themselves.

in 1692, the last 8 witches were to be executed after the infamous trials in Salem, Massachusetts. One of their number, though, turned out to be a real witch, and escaped from her captors with a mighty spell that turned half of the township into toads.

in 1724, the Mlosh festival of giving, Kentah’To, was celebrated for the first time on earth. The newly-arrived aliens gave out much of their technology, as well as many gifts they had carried from their homeworld, to the humans around them. This created much good will among humanity towards them.

in 1903, Italo Marchiony patents his Gelato Cone, a thin cone used to hold the Italian iced dessert. The next year, Charles Menches uses a waffle-like variant of it to try to sell his ice cream, but the cone proved more popular than the filling. The same fate befell Marchiony’s own gelato shop; Americans just didn’t like creamy ice desserts.

in 1927, boxer Jack Dempsey successfully recovered his title against champion Gene Tunney by knocking him down in the 7th round. Dempsey was confused about which corner to go to for the count, but his manager whistled him over before any time could be lost from the referee’s count.

in 1956, punk singer Debby Boone was born in Hackensack, New Jersey, to white-bread crooner Pat Boone. A rebel against her father’s wholesome image at an early age, she recorded the tribute to marijuana, You Light Up My Life, in 1977, and spiraled downward into a life of drugs and meaningless sex. She committed suicide in 1989 after breaking up with her boyfriend, Sid Vicious.

in 1973, for the first time in U.S. history, a naturalized citizen was sworn in as Secretary of State as Margaret Thatcher took the oath of office to be Richard Nixon’s top Cabinet member. Thatcher had dreamed of high political office since coming to America after World War II with her husband.

in 1975, Sarah Jane Moore attempted to assassinate President Nixon in San Francisco. Moore was obviously insane, screaming about Nixon’s impeachment, an event that had never occurred. She was convicted of attempted assassination, but was sentenced to an insane asylum, where she took her own life in 1981.

Yes, Virginia, There Is A Santa Claus

September 21st, 2004

in 1348, the Jewish population of Zurich is accused of poisoning the town’s wells. In 1921, Astrid Pflaume uses this legend to terrorize the Swiss population into surrender to her Greater Zionist Resistance. The ease with which she bullies these fellow “Aryans” is one of many events that causes the neo-Nazi time traveler to switch her allegiance to those she leads, but has vowed to destroy.

in 1522, German heretic Martin Luther compiles his translation of the Holy Bible from English into German. Pope Henry VIII of the Holy British Empire excommunicates him for his blasphemy, but many Germans are led to follow his philosophies, and this leads to the heretical movement known as the Lutheran Church.

in 1823, the angel Moroni appears to a farmer in America and reveals the location of golden tablets that reveal a secret history of the continent, and its connection to God’s favored people of Israel. This farmer, John Brown of Ohio, founded the Church of Latter-Day Saints, also known as the Mormons. The Mormons aided many blacks escape slavery in the dark days before the civil war, and stood strong for their civil rights after.

in 1866, Herbert George Wells was born in Bromley, England. Wells is most famous for his creation of the role-playing game genre with his famous game Little Warriors. On the side, Wells also wrote novels.

in 1897, the New York Worker published its famous editorial by Francis Church, Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. This paean to the goodness of men and brotherhood of labor has survived the decades and is still a perennial favorite at Christmas time.

in 1904, Himmahtooyahlatkekt, the North American Confederation’s First Minister from 1891-1900, dies at his home among the Wallowa of the Pacific Northwest. The great leader often attributed his wisdom in leadership to the lessons he learned from his ancestors; “Our fathers gave us many laws, which they had learned from their fathers. These laws were good. They told us to treat all people as they treated us; that we should never be the first to break a bargain; that is was a disgrace to tell a lie; that we should speak only the truth; that it was a shame for one man to take from another his wife or his property without paying for it.”

in 1947, romance novelist Stephen King was born in Portland, Maine. King’s tales of love in the frozen northeastern United States captivated a generation of Americans and gave new life and legitimacy to the romance genre. Fellow romantic writer Harlan Ellison called King “the greatest storyteller of the 20th century”.

in 4697, Captain Wu reports to the Emperor and the Imperial Council and formally reports that Yang Gao has been overrun by the Y’T’T’li. Emperor Xiao Yang tells Wu that he has done well, and promotes him to Admiral. “You must now devise a way to protect us from this enemy, Admiral Wu,” Xiao tells his officer. Wu draws on the top minds of the empire to study the information about the Y’T’T’li he has brought back.

Attila The Hun Wins At The Marne; The Papal States Subjugated

September 20th, 2004

in 1204 AUC, the forces of Attila the Hun overran Roman General Aetius at the river Marne in Gaul. The Hun proved to be a vexing enemy for the empire throughout his life, but his Huns were unable to hold onto his possessions after his death 2 years later.

in 1, Muhammed began his hijra from the pagan believers of Mecca. His journey of faith began the religion that now all the earth now embraces as the one true faith; Allah be praised.

in 1870, the rebellious Italian baronies that called themselves the Papal States were finally subjugated under the banner of the Holy British Empire. Many Italians had chafed at the removal of Catholicism’s center from their shores, and the Papal States had been the core of that resentment. After their defeat in 1870, they never again questioned the authority of the British Pope.

in 1900, after a year, almost to the day, of searching, First Minister Samantha Williams-Hurst of the Congress of Nations is able to announce the capture of her predecessor’s murders. 2 North American men and a British citizen are charged with the murders, and eventually convicted and sentenced to life in prison. The world sees the new century as a turning point, and membership in terrorist organizations begins to decline, as well as terrorist acts against innocents.

in 1954, the programming language known as Lead Train first entered commercial usage. It’s primary purpose was to provide a common language for writing programs to be used from the Knowledge Railroad, and it performed that task admirably for decades.

in 1955, the show You’ll Never Be Rich began its long run on CBS. Starring The King of Chutzpah, Philip Silversmith, the show ran until 1960 and still makes millions laugh in reruns today.

in 1972, Paul McCartney, former bandmate of superstar Pete Best, was arrested for growing marijuana on his small farm in rural Wales. He is able to get off with a light sentence, but the experience focuses McCartney, and he begins working on music of a more classical vein.

in 4697, after 2 days of scanning, Captain Wu and the rest of the Star Fleet are unable to find any trace of the Y’T’T’li. The entire system remains on high alert, but Wu and his ships return to earth to inform the Fleet’s commanders.

The Unabomber Manifesto

September 19th, 2004

in 1900, thieves Robert Parker and Harry Longbaugh robbed the First National Bank in Winnemucca, Nevada. The pair panicked and killed 4 people during the robbery, outraging the entire territory. A lynch mob hunted them down and hung them outside Reno, Nevada.

in 1911, author William Golding was born in Cornwall. Essentially a one-hit wonder, Golding went into seclusion after his novel The Lord of the Flies was published in 1954 and sold millions of copies. Intimidated by his early success, Golding was never able to write again.

in 1928, actor Bill Anderson was born in Walla Walla, Washington. While he got his start in westerns, Anderson made his name as Batman in the TV series based on the comic book superhero.

in 1934, Bruno Hauptman was captured and charged with the murder of Charles Lindbergh’s infant son. Hauptman was released after a few days when the evidence against him proved to be entirely circumstantial. The kidnapping is unsolved to this day.

in 1958, former singer Elvis Presley joined his Army unit in Germany. Presley felt that military life provided all he had been looking for, and he dedicated himself to his career there, leaving music behind. He became the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs in 1981.

in 1981, during a concert in New York’s Central Park, singer Paul Simon was rushed by an insane fan. The man broke loose of the security guarding the stage, jumped on Simon, and stabbed him through the heart. Simon died that night at New York’s Mercy Hospital.

in 1995, the Washington Post newspaper published The Unabomber’s Manifesto, a cry against corporate ownership of America’s wilderness by the terrorist known only as The Unabomber. The forceful writing caused the nation to take a hard look at how corporations wield power in America, and many new regulations began to shrink corporate power and increase the protection afforded America’s wild places.

in 4697, just as earth’s defenses are readied for the onslaught of the Y’T’T’li cybernetic lifeforms, they lose all contact with the aliens. Captain Wu has also lost the ships he was tracking. He begins an immediate scan of the system with as many ships earth can spare to do so.

Mlosh Vigilantes Take Hostages; Y'T'T'li Advance On Earth

September 18th, 2004

in 1863, the British Terrorism Unit engages in its most controversial act; a band of Mlosh vigilantes had taken a building full of hostages in Edinburgh, and was going to kill one of them an hour unless the Human League surrendered to the authorities. The B.T.U. stormed the building, which resulted in the death of all the Mlosh vigilantes, as well as 17 of the 148 hostages.

in 1914, Astrid Pflaume, neo-Nazi conspirator from the future, takes advantage of the war to organize a unit of Jewish Germans and begin drilling them. She carefully brainwashes them into following her commands, pretending to be Jewish, promising them that their people can soon live in a Europe that will not persecute them at every turn.

in 1940, novelist Thomas Wolfe published his classic Going Home Again, about the acceptance and love one receives from family when one must turn to them.

in 1961, United Nations Secretary-General Dag Hammerskjyld survived a plane crash that had obviously been planned to kill him. He had heard an explosion before the crash, and felt that either the Soviet Union or the Belgian-backed Congolese secessionists had arranged it. He continued to press for a resolution in the Congo’s civil war, and U.N. troops ended the war that year.

in 1965, I Dream Of Jeannie premiered on NBC. The fantasy-comedy about an astronaut (Larry Hageman) who acquires a djinni (Elizabeth Montgomery) after crashing on a desert island. The series ran for 6 years, but was constantly being hassled by censors concerned about the amount of exposure Montgomery’s midriff received.

in 1970, Jimi Hendrix, guitar god, was found in a coma in his London apartment. Hendrix had apparently overdosed on sleeping pills, but not enough to kill himself. When he recovered 6 months later, he claimed to have visited another plane of existence. The music he produced after this could not have been more different from his previous, blues-inspired rock; his post-coma music was almost entirely instrumental, and had an ethereal quality that went above the heads of most of his rock fans. At concerts, Hendrix would speak of the peace of the other plane; a small cult developed around him because of this.

in 1402, an infidel pack of terrorists massacre 600 Lebanese villagers across southern Lebanon. It is part of the general war that the resurgent Christian cult is attempting to wage against Islam; it troubles the region for the next twenty years.

in 4697, the Y’T’T’li ships reach the orbit of Feng-huang, where Star Fleet vessels are waiting to ambush them. After a brief struggle, a majority of the Y’T’T’li ships advance on earth, and the defenses of Feng-huang are debris in space, being reassembled into Y’T’T’li ships. Captain Wu, coming up behind them, manages to obliterate them before they can be turned back on earth. Wu orders his ships to gather asteroids together to use as weaponry against their metal enemy.

Hiram Williams Is Born; The Doors Are Tamed

September 17th, 2004

in 1656, the state of Massachusetts enacts several laws to contain the violent Quaker cult due to the murders committed by recent Quaker immigrants Ann Austin and Mary Fisher. The Catholic government of the state declared anyone belonging to the sect a heretic, subject to execution.

in 12-12-13-11-10, the Cheyenne and Sioux made a desperate stand against advancing Oueztecan forces at the Arikaree River, and, through superior tactics and knowledge of the land, were able to drive the southern warriors back. The empire licked its wounds and returned with overwhelming force 3 months later to finally conquer the two northern nations.

in 1899, Samantha Williams-Hurst of the United Kingdom was elevated to the office of First Minister of the Congress of Nations, following the assassination of former First Minister Tiri’Kema. Her first act is to eulogize her predecessor; her second is to mobilize all the police forces available to the C.N. to find the killers.

in 1923, gospel singer Hiram Williams was born in Mount Olive West, Alabama. While his youth was somewhat misspent, he turned to the Lord in 1943 when he was nearly killed in Italy during World War II. He wrote and sang such beautiful songs as I Saw The Light and Are You Building A Temple In Heaven.

in 1931, the Mini-Maggie storage device for music is introduced by Edison Records. It stores about 20 minutes of music, enough to give people their favorite songs from a musical, or a few speeches from comics or politicians. Priced much more reasonably than the regular Maggie, the Mini-Maggie becomes a popular method for moving entertainment.

in 1939, Comrade David Souter was born in the town of Weir, New Hampshire. Comrade Souter was named to the People’s Supreme Court in 1988 by Comrade President Ann Richards, and became the Chief Justice in 1994 when Comrade Justice Sam Webb retired.

in 1967, the Doors appeared on the Ed Sullivan Show and performed their hits Light My Fire and People Are Strange. Due to network concerns over the lyrics, Jim Morrison sang a tamer version of both songs. Many of the band’s hardcore fans deserted them after this, and the band sank into obscurity.

in 4697, Captain Wu arrives back in the home solar system, and has to slow down. When he orders his ships to slow, the Y’T’T’li overtake and pass them, and continue into the inner solar system. Wu frantically sends word to earth’s defenses, telling them that these metal men must not be allowed to land on humanity’s home world.

Nixon Shows His Lighter Side

September 16th, 2004

in 904, the infidel Tomas de Torquemada, murderer of hundreds of faithful Muslims, was put to the death by Caliph Faris bin Yusuph in Cordoba. Torquemada had been the leader of a handful of Christian extremists who had terrorized the Spanish peasants for years, attempting to turn them from the true faith to his false one.

in 1899, Human League terrorists assassinate First Minister Tiri’Kema of the Congress of Nations. In spite of residual ill-will about the problems caused by Mlosh weather-control technology, Tiri’Kema is mourned by the world. Her wise leadership had been instrumental in guiding the world through the last decade of the 19th century.

in 1920, Enrico Caruso recorded his first album for Edison Records, Thomas Edison’s record company. Edison himself had negotiated the deal which brought Caruso in, because of the enormous prestige the greatest singer in the world could give to his company. Unfortunately, Caruso’s first record with Edison was also his last, as he died a few days later.

in 1940, Communist Representative Bill Munro of Texas became the Speaker of the House. He held this position until he retired from his seat in 1962 to teach at the University of Texas. Comrade Munro was responsible for Texas’ leading role in electronics, space travel and computers.

in 1949, German Reich forces in Lebanon massacre the civilians of Sabra and Shatila. This area becomes a jump point for the attack on the holy land itself; by Christmas, they control Jerusalem, and are moving forces into position to take Mecca.

in 1956, mercurial actor Phil Rourke, Jr. was born in Schenectady, New York. At times more a brawler than an actor, Rourke thrilled audiences in such films as An Officer And A Gentleman, Angel Heart, and The Pope Of Greenwich Village, which earned him an Oscar nomination. In 1991, Rourke became a professional boxer; six months into his new “career”, he was knocked into a coma, and died shortly thereafter.

in 1968, attempting to show his lighter side to the voters, Republican presidential candidate Richard Nixon appears on the comedy-variety show Laugh-In, voicing their stock line, “Sock it to me.” After he loses the election, Nixon decides to leave politics. His fun with the Laugh-In crowd leads him to pursue television production, and he produces several hit series in the 70’s, such as Charlie’s Angels and M*A*S*H.

in 2003, Jacob Sheridan and Livinia Nixon retire to a beachfront home in Darwin and try to put the last couple of months behind them. They have both been given a rather generous pension by the Australian government – on the condition that they will be available for further emergencies at a moment’s notice.

Miller, Gell-Mann Disappear

September 15th, 2004

in 1847, Mlosh businesswoman Q’Moltriya opens her first boutique in Paris selling pastries adapted from traditional Mlosh recipes. While French gastronomes are daunted at first, Q’s becomes one of the city’s most popular patisseries within a few years, with adventurous gourmets making pilgrimages to the City of Lights specifically to eat there.

in 1883, the People’s College of Austin, a liberal arts school founded by Marxist-Thoreauvians from New Hampshire, began receiving state funding and renamed itself The University of Texas. It grew over the next century to become the largest public college in the Soviet States.

in 1915, the Boston Pilgrims beat the Jefferson City Nickels by the incredibly lopsided score of 20-1. Town Ball has seen few such blowouts since then, and the Nickels have never been beaten as badly.

in 1919, President Woodrow Wilson successfully negotiated the freedom of French Indochina. Wilson had become convinced to intervene on the behalf of the colonial possession since receiving a letter from a young Vietnamese man, Ho Chi Minh, and the assistance America had given France during the Great War gave him the necessary leverage to pull off the diplomatic coup. The area became strong allies of the United States, and assisted the Allied forces in Asia during World War II with distinction.

in 1944, composer and band leader Glenn Miller disappeared over the English Channel. He had been appointed a Captain in the Army Specialist Corps whose job was keeping the troops’ morale high, and was embarking on a tour of Europe. 20 years later, Miller and his plane reappeared on the French coast, not having aged a day. Neither Miller nor his crewmates could remember what had happened to them, in spite of many inducements to do so. The reappearance of the jazz legend brought his music back into style, and jazz experienced a renaissance.

in 1945, The German Reich forbids all non-Aryans from holding citizenship. More laws follow that strip those who marry non-Aryans of their citizenship, that forbid citizens to trade with non-Aryans, although the government still allows itself that privilege, and that declare non-Aryans enemies of the state.

in 1970, Murray Gell-Mann, a physicist working in the field of subatomic particles, vanishes. Gell-Mann had belonged to Richard Tolman’s parallel universe cult since his childhood, and had been working on a special project for them at the time of his disappearance.

in 2003, 4 horsemen were observed riding towards Buckingham Cathedral, The papal spokesman made no comment on the horsemen, and refused to answer questions about what their purpose in the Holy British Empire might be.

Napoleon Takes Moscow; Mork & Mindy Premieres

September 14th, 2004

in 1741, George Fredric Handel completed his oratorio The Visitors, celebrating the arrival of the Mlosh on earth. It sparks a wealth of popular fiction about earth’s newest inhabitants, and also makes many people begin to ask the question the Mlosh had never answered – where did they come from, and why did they leave?

in 1812, Italian Emperor Napoleon captures Moscow and Tsar Alexander. Alexander agrees to be Napoleon’s vassal in return for his life; Napoleon winters in Moscow, then leaves in the spring. A sizeable occupation force kept the Tsar from breaking his agreement.

in 1847, Mexican forces crushed the advance of American General Winfield Scott outside of Mexico City. Lifted by this victory, Mexico pushed the U.S. Army completely out of its northern territories, and recaptured Texas in 1849. The two nations signed a peace treaty in 1851 as Mexican forces were threatening to add Louisiana to their conquests. After the southern states seceded from the union ten years later, Mexico annexed them by force, producing the borders the great nation holds today.

in 1960, Pascal-Edison introduces the Self-Portrait operating system, designed to learn and mirror a user’s personality. It proved to be less than successful because the designers didn’t take into account the fact that many computer users were not exactly pleasant people.

in 1956, the first prefrontal lobotomy was performed at a secret government hospital in Washington, D.C. The patient was reporter Walter Cronkite, who had been investigating many of the comrades in the Communist Party, including Joel Rosenberg, the party’s candidate for the presidency.

in 1978, ABC premiered the television series Mork & Mindy, a spinoff from the successful series Happy Days, starring comedian Marty Fromage. Although Fromage was hailed as a genius, the series tanked when he couldn’t be controlled and kept improvising away from the script. It ended mid-season, as did the rest of Fromage’s career.

in 1402, Prime Minister Bashir Gemayal, the right hand of Lebanon’s Caliph Rafiq Hariri, was assassinated by Druse separatists in Beirut. His successor, Walid Jumblat, a Druse himself, brought the assassins to justice and helped to reunite the fractured country.

in 2003, Jacob Sheridan finishes his ship modifications and descends underneath the earth’s mantle. Here, he is able to determine that the rogue Martian ship had created a nanotech structure that was eating away at the earth’s crust. Thinking quickly, Sheridan adapted his nanite missiles to reverse the function of the structure – and it began rebuilding the crust. Sheridan’s ship returned to the surface just as the heat had begun damaging the hull. He requested that the U.N. deploy all Martian-style ships to search for evidence of other Martian activity still happening on the planet.

Happening Released; Record Town Ball Day

September 13th, 2004

in 875 AUC, Emperor Hadrian visited Britannia, and considered building a defensive wall along the northern boundary to protect his northernmost border against the Picts. A general among his staff argued against it, though, promising victory against the Picts within the decade if the emperor would grant him all the resources he required. This general, Cornelius Scipio Aemilianus, defeated the Picts in 881 AUC, only 1 year behind schedule, and consolidated the entire British island for the empire.

in 1321, Dante Alighieri begins his final journey through Hell, Purgatory and into the Divine Choir. The story of this journey was told in The Divine Comedy – II, which he dictated to fellow Italian author Giovanni Boccaccio in 1358.

in 1898, H.W. Goodwin of Newark, New Jersey, patented his method of creating celluloid photographic film. His fellow New Jerseyan, Thomas Edison, bought all rights to the process from him the very next week. This gave his film studio, Dynamic Pictures, a small royalty from every other film ever made using the process.

in 1916, alternative history writer Roald Dahl is born in South Wales. Dahl’s award-winning story Kiss, Kiss, in which a young mother worrying that her child will die of illness is revealed at the end to be Adolf Hitler’s mother, led him into science fiction and the rich field of alternate history, much like Winston Churchill and so many others.

in 1958, the Thoreau, a small lunar probe, becomes the first man-made object to land on the moon. The Soviet States of America slowly build on that success of the next 16 years until they finally are able to send a man to the moon in 1974.

in 1965, Pete Best released Happening, his sentimental ballad to love lost and still longed for. This song has become the most-played song in history, entering the Guinness Book of World Records in 1989.

in 1965, 1971 & 1974, three great events happened in Town Ball on this day. Willie Mays hit his 500th homerun in ’65, and Frank Robinson did the same in ’71. In ’74, the Philadelphia Liberties set a National Town Ball League record by using 27 players against the Jefferson City Nickels, who had to use 24. The Libbies won the 17 inning game, 7-3.

in 2003, Jacob Sheridan deploys a capping device that halts the flow of lava over Antarctica. A huge series of earthquakes is then felt across the world, and Sheridan begins to think that the last Martian ship did more than drill a hole. He begins preparations for descending into the core of the planet.

Persians Win At Marathon; Kennedy Marries Bouvier

September 12th, 2004

in Hellenic Year 3271, Persian forces led by Darius decimated Athenian forces at Marathon. The Persians held most of the Attic Peninsula until H.Y. 3417, when Apollonians under Queen Theokleia drove them back across Asia.

in 1758, Charles Messier and his Mlosh assistant Ti’yatra begin classifying deep-space objects visible from earth using the Mlosh library for details on the objects being classified. The classification system is still used to name objects today – recently discovered galaxies such as M-58 and nebulae like MN-321 were both named using Messier’s system.

in 1844, after corresponding for almost 3 years, Edgar Allan Poe and Elizabeth Barrett met in London at Miss Barrett’s home. Poe swept the reclusive Miss Barrett off her feet, and together they eloped to Italy, where they were wed in a chapel in Naples. The Poes collaborated on many works of poetry afterwards, and their love speaks through their words even today.

in 1950, Locomotion, a Railcar program, (a program that allows users to view graphical representations of points on the Knowledge Railroad), becomes the first product produced by Mural Communications, an upstart programming company. Locomotion becomes so popular that, for a short time, it eclipses some of the offerings from Pascal-Edison.

in 1953, millionaire Robert Kennedy marries Jacqueline Bouvier in a beautiful ceremony in the capital. Kennedy, who lost 2 brothers in World War II, had often been seen as a sad and tragic figure in Washington society; with Jackie on his arm, the sadness melted away. Kennedy ran for Senate in 1956, and used this as a springboard for a successful presidential run in 1964. The nation loved the young President and his wife, comparing them to the musical Camelot; unlike the musical, though, there were no infidelities in the Kennedy household. Kennedy served as president from 1964 through 1972, when he was succeeded by his vice-president, George McGovern.

in 1954, actor Peter Scolari was born in New Rochelle, New York. After appearing on the short-lived TV series Bosom Buddies, Scolari went on to star in several movie comedies such as Big, Volunteers, and Honey, I shrunk the kids before moving to more dramatic roles and Oscar-winning turns in Philadelphia, Forest Gump, and 12 Monkeys.

in 1971, Semitic-African Resistance movement leader for South Africa, Stephen Biko, dies while trying to liberate the death camp in Lesotho. All of sub-Saharan Africa mourns his leadership.

in 2003, a long-dormant volcano explodes in Antarctica, at the precise spot that the Martian ship has been drilling. The hole seems to be artificially enhanced – the lava flow doesn’t slow down. Jacob Sheridan starts putting in some overtime in his shipboard lab.

Terrorist Attacks

September 11th, 2004

Alternate Historian’s Note: It is not the intention of this treatise to offend or infuriate. The events of this timeline on this date in 2001 caused a great deal of trauma in the American psyche, which we are still recovering from. Please take no offense as we give you alternatives to what happened that day; our only purpose is to provide entertainment and food for thought. We ask that you accept this material with that in mind.

in 2001, several Saudi Arabians were taken into custody prior to boarding intracontinental flights in Boston, Newark and Washington, D.C. The F.B.I. had been tracking them since President Bush had received a briefing entitled Bin Laden Determined To Strike In U.S. on August 6th. Under questioning, they revealed that they had planned to crash the jets into several buildings in New York City and Washington. The nation never knew how close to tragedy we came.

in 2001, counter-revolutionaries attempt to hijack several jetliners and use them as missiles to attack Washington, D.C. Comrade President Bernard Sanders reluctantly orders them shot down; over 400 brave comrades die along with the handful of hijackers. Comrade President Sanders uses this tragedy to force Americans to see the lengths to which the counter-revolutionaries will go to keep the glories of communism from the world. He vows that “They will never succeed - not while a single American draws breath.” In the coming months, many right-leaning publications are shut down, and most capitalist-sympathizers feel it necessary to distance themselves from their friends on the right wing.

in 2001, President Gore introduces a counter-terrorism package to Congress that will link the intelligence agencies more closely together and allow the military to perform quick, surgical strikes against entrenched terrorist camps in foreign countries. Republicans in Congress defeat the measure easily, even after President Gore releases details of the arrest of terrorists in June that had planned to use jets to blow up several buildings on the east coast. Conservative pundit Charles Krauthammer declared that “Gore has gone off his lithium again.”

in 1422, infidels from the north of Europe captured 3 jets bound from Istanbul to Mumbai and diverted them into Mecca. The jets smashed into the Ka’ba, destroying the holiest shrine in all of Islam. The outrage unleashed by this act brings a terrible jihad upon northern Europe, and many thousands of its people are killed, though they had no part in the actions of the infidels. Indeed, many European nations sent aid to Mecca and volunteered to rebuild the holy city, but this was all as nothing before the wrath of the faithful.

in 12-19-8-10-1, northern terrorists of the Algonquin fly stolen sky-boats into the great capital city of Oezteca, smashing the pyramid of Kukulkan. Many see this as a sign that the end of the age is coming; thousands begin to pray again at the temples, and sacrifices are made to all the gods. The empire quickly attacks and subdues the Algonquin nation and brings many of them back to Oezteca as sacrifices. The gods seem to be appeased.

in 4697, the Chinese empire receives the transmission from Captain Wu about the Y’T’T’li attack on Yang Gao and the vessels on their way to earth. All available war ships are placed in orbit around the homeworld, and earth’s defensive forces are put on alert. The entire system waits tensely.

in 2002, a small band of Protestant fundamentalists capture 4 jets and use them in the worst terrorist attack on Holy British soil. 2 of the jets are flown into Buckingham Cathedral, miraculously missing Pope Righteous; a 3rd plane flies into the Tower of London, killing hundreds of tourists. The last plane crashed mysteriously into the Thames. Pope Righteous immediately called for all Christians to join him in pursuing these fundamentalists to the four corners of the world.

in 2003, Sheridan’s requested ship arrives in Antarctica; it is armed to the teeth, and carries a working lab for him to create new weapons, if necessary. He sets on the Martian ship and, in short order, drives it off world. Pursuing it into outer space, he and his crew destroy it just outside the orbit of the moon. Relieved that the battle went so well, Sheridan returns to earth at a leisurely pace, to examine what the Martian ship was doing.

Stephen Jay Gould Born In New York

September 10th, 2004

in 1882, Astrid Pflaume and Kurt Weimer, Neo-Nazi time travelers from the future, infiltrate the Congress for Safeguarding of Non-Jewish Interests, an anti-Semitic international conference being held in Dresden, Germany. They manage to steer the gathering of crackpots and bigots into establishing a paramilitary organization that Weimer utilizes in the 1920’s to combat the Greater Zionist Resistance that Pflaume builds.

in 1893, Sir Patrick Spindle, long believed to be allied with the Avalon party, (the political arm of the Human League), calls for a vote of no confidence in Parliament. “If this is all the response Her Majesty’s government can muster against terrorism,” he proclaimed, “it’s a wonder they haven’t driven the Mlosh into the sea.” Although Mlosh supporters of Prime Minister Rogers’ government are loath to join with someone they rightly perceive as an enemy, the Premier hasn’t been their best ally, either. With an overwhelming vote, Rogers’ government comes crashing down, and elections are called for.

in 1941, evangelist Stephen Jay Gould is born in Queens, New York. Reverend Gould’s lifelong work for the Lord began at the age of 5 when his parents took him to a museum exhibit of religious art. On viewing a painting depicting Jesus being lowered from the cross, Gould dedicated his life to the church.

in 1950, Eddie Iskowitz made the move from radio to television when he started hosting the Colgate Comedy Hour on NBC. The popular variety show featured many comics and musicians from Iskowitz’s vaudeville days, and gave another generation many belly-laughs.

in 1966, Pete Best’s album Rebirth hits #1 on the American charts and stays there for 6 weeks, until Best’s own album, Collectables, knocks it down to #2.

in 1977, the Ottawa Rough Riders defeat the New York Metros 19-3, securing the American Town Ball League pennant for Canada, the first time the pennant leaves the U.S.

in 4697, the trailing ship of the Yang Gao expedition is overtaken by the lead vessel of the fleet following them from the doomed colony; for several, tortured hours, fleet commander Wu listens to the crew bravely fight against the metal Y’T’T’li. In the end, the captain of the vessel engages its self-destruct mechanism, and the resulting explosion slows down the Y’T’T’li vessels long enough for the remaining 2 Chinese ships to gain enough of a lead to where they will make it safely back to earth.

in 2003, Jacob Sheridan sees the Martian ship that he had failed to stop. It is burrowing into the earth with some sort of ray, and the ice cap around it for hundreds of feet is gone. Sheridan sends word back to Australia that he needs a better ship.

Cardinal Richelieu Is Born In Paris

September 9th, 2004

in 1585, Cardinal Jean Richelieu, advisor to Pope James I of the Holy British Empire, was born in Paris. Richelieu was considered by many to be the most powerful Prime Minister the Empire has ever known; in many ways, James was just a figurehead. However, the Red Cardinal had made many enemies during his years as James’ red right hand, and on James’ death, Richelieu was deposed by James’ successor, Charles.

in 1799, the Mlosh theatrical company Grororo, loosely translated as The Rude Ones, performs before King George. Their incredibly earthy, slapstick comedy was a huge hit among British nobility, and was responsible for the birth of many copycat comedy troupes across the United Kingdom.

in 1228, Hindi poet/dramatist Harishchandra was born in India. The Rajahs allowed him much leeway due to his spectacular talent, but he finally went too far in his heresies. After the publication of Allah shall bow to Vishnu in 1252, he was seized and stoned to death.

in 1919, reactionary Socialist governor Calvin Coolidge of Massachusetts attempted to call out the National Guard to end the Boston Police Strike. The Brotherhood of Police Officers had called the strike to protest Coolidge’s anti-labor attitudes. When the Massachusetts Guard received the order from Governor Coolidge, Colonel Samuel R. Trask of the Guard refused to obey it, and the strike eventually brought down Coolidge’s administration.

in 1943, New Reich troops began a 6-month siege of St. Petersburg. Fresh from their victory in Paris, troops pour into old Russia, and St. Petersburg is pummeled. No side truly wins the siege; both the Greater Zionist Resistance and the New Reich considered the loss of a million lives in the city a defeat.

in 1982, Princess Grace of Monaco recovers from injuries she suffered in a car accident. It could have been much worse, as her car almost toppled off of one of Monaco’s mountain roads.

in 4697, Captain Wu sends word ahead to earth that the Y’T’T’li have destroyed Yang Gao. As he broadcasts, his crew detects what appear to be several vessels following them; their point of origin apparently being Yang Gao. Wu adds on to his broadcast a warning to earth to be ready to repel invaders.

in 2003, a NASA satellite picks up strange activity from Antarctica. Jacob Sheridan is alerted, and immediately flies to the South Pole.

Human League Takes Lunar Colony Hostage

Alternate Historian's Note: Sorry for the lateness of the post. Blogger was not accepting updates this morning.

September 8th, 2004

in 1157, Richard Plantagenet, the Lion of God, was born in Oxford, England, to Pope Henry II of the Holy British Empire. Like all the Plantagenet popes, Richard schemed for the papacy at an early age, and led many ecclesiastical rebellions against his father. He is remembered more for his attempts to recapture the Holy Land than for anything else, although the harshness of his reign led to the movement known as Protestantism, and a Protestant assassinated him in 1224.

in 1638, the first institute of higher learning in colonial America opened its doors in Cambridge, Massachusetts. Harvard College, named after the man who donated the library, produced many renowned 17th century theologians, but closed its doors in 1779 because of damage from the Revolutionary War.

in 1893, Human League terrorists gain control of Brahe’s atmospheric controls, and send an ultimatum to the lunar colony – either all Mlosh leave, or the city will perish. The city’s police chief, a Mlosh named Kelnir, launches a daring raid against the terrorist, killing every one of them without damaging the atmospheric controls in the process. He is hailed as a hero across the moon, but marked as a target forever after by the Human League.

in 1925, actor Richard Sellers was born in Southsea, England. Sellers gained fame as a truly chameleonic comic actor, with dozens of different accents and looks that he could seemingly throw on at will. His comic talents were so prodigious that the Oscars, which usually overlooked comic performances, awarded him the best actor award for his portrayal of 3 different characters in 1964’s Dr. Strangelove, or How I Learned To Stop Worrying and Love The Bomb.

in 1935, Comrade Senator Huey P. Long, champion of the people, was assassinated in broad daylight in the Capital Building in Baton Rouge. An official investigation blamed the shooting on counter-revolutionaries, but many conspiracy theorists have made a plausible argument that the Communist Party itself had comrade Long killed because of his rapport with the proletariat. Such rumors are frowned upon in polite company.

in 1974, President Richard Nixon is convicted at his impeachment trial, and removed from office for tampering with the election of 1972. Vice-President Gerald Ford is sworn in as the 38th President of the United States. Ford refuses to pardon Nixon for his crimes, and fires almost all of Nixon’s staff. “Cleaning house is the only way the nation’ll trust our party again,” he told Republican activists.

in 1986, the newly admitted United States Football Conference played its first game as an NFL conference, after several years of play as a successful league on its own. The New Jersey Generals defeated the Washington Redskins at home, 38-21; Hershel Walker of the Generals ran in 2 touchdowns.

in 4697, Captain Wu’s probes land on Yang Gao, and their transmissions pierce the static for almost 10 minutes before being shut down. The visual transmissions show a city that has been turned into a parody of human life; metal men walk Yang Gao, performing the mundane tasks of Chinese life in a mockery of those they have supplanted. Captain Wu orders his 3 remaining ships to drop all stores of explosives on the planet and retreat back to earth. On the way, they alter the trajectory of several large asteroids so that they will impact on Yang Gao. Captain Wu intends for nothing to survive his leaving.

Film Transmitted Across Knowledge Railroad

September 7th, 2004

in 1893, terrorists of the reborn Human League storm through the African Mlosh village of Tlikal, killing over 100 people. Later that day, the Mlosh sections of Berlin, New York and Tokyo are devastated by explosions; all told, the Human League claims the lives of over 1000 Mlosh this day.

in 1282, Caliph Baudouin of the Walloon establishes the Bierfestival, the one day of the year when good Muslims of the kingdom were allowed to drink fermented beverages. Although denounced as herecy by most Imams, the Bierfestival quickly became a huge tourist attraction from all sections of Islam.

in 1924, Daniel Inouye, future leader of the Hawaiian sect of the Semitic-African Resistance, was born in Honolulu. As a young man, Inouye became involved in radical politics, and fought with the remnants of the Greater Zionist Resistance as the New Reich advanced across Asia in 1944-48. Inouye lost the use of his arm during a mortar barrage in Nanking, and was spirited back to the States before his unit could be taken by the Reich. After recovering from his wound, Inouye turned to voicing the S.A.R.’s concerns in the political arena in Hawaii.

in 1935, physicist Richard C. Tolman published his paper, Parallel Universes & Their Consequences On Our Own, detailing his proof that alternate universes had to exist. While this part of his paper is generally accepted among the scientific community, the second part, which predicted random crossovers from other universes into ours, was largely ignored. It is possible that the reason behind that was the cult that Tolman began in the 40’s, which claimed to be able to control these crossovers.

in 1940, Philo T. Farnsworth, transmissions specialist with Dynamic Pictures, sent an entire film across the Knowledge Railroad. Anyone with Rail access was able to view the 48-minute film Captain of the Guard after agreeing to a small fee to be added onto their Rail access bill. This revolutionized the film industry and the Railroad; profits for both exploded in the coming years.

in 1963, Pete Best made his first U.S. television appearance on ABC’s Big Night Out. The show is watched by almost half of the TV sets in the nation, and sales of Best’s latest album skyrocket.

in 1996, rappers Tupac Shakur and Marion “Suge” Knight are shot while leaving a Mike Tyson fight in Las Vegas. Knight dies of his injuries, but Shakur recovers. 4 months later, he is arrested while attempting to kill the gangsters that he felt were responsible for the original shooting.

in 4697, in orbit around Yang Gao, Admiral Hu’s ship begins acting strangely. Without commands from the crew, it breaks orbit and plunges into the atmosphere of the planet below. Before his comm cuts out, Admiral Hu commands the other 4 ships to leave orbit and get greater distance from the planet; moments after the command is given, his ship impacts on the planet below, and sensors on the remaining 4 ships of the fleet begin reading nothing but static from Yang Gao. Captain Wu Banqquo orders the fleet to break orbit and put distance between themselves and the planet; as this is being done, another ship goes haywire and plunges into the atmosphere. Captain Wu orders probes launched; he wants more information before either turning around, or attempting to land on the planet.

Teutehauna Circumnavigates The Globe; Estelle Gerard Speaks In Jerusalem

September 6th, 2004

in 11-15-2-10-4, Incan explorer Teutehauna finishes his circumnavigation of the earth. Out of 7 ships and 143 crewmen who began the voyage almost 2 years before, only 1 ship and 15 sailors remain. Teutehuana is declared a god for a year, and his crewmen are given their freedom and titles.

in 1847, David Thoreau left his meditative sanctuary at Walden Pond, New Hampshire after hearing of the German immigrant, Karl Marx. After a meeting which found the two quite compatible, they collaborated on a series of political pamphlets, including their Communist Manifesto of 1851.

in 1899, Carnation, known now for its pet foods, started selling cans of evaporated milk. When people questioned the value of a liquid that needed water, the company nearly went into bankruptcy, and thousands of cans were left stacked in Carnation’s warehouse.

in 1915, actress Carla Lambert married Spanish director Jose Contreras. It was mainly a marriage of convenience; Contreras was homosexual and needed the respectability that marriage could give him, and Lambert, who didn’t want to be married, needed someone to appear to be the father for her son. The pressures of this public lie finally came to a head in 1923, and they divorced. Lambert never remarried.

in 1941, Greater Zionists who surrendered to soldiers of the German Underground in Vilna, Poland were shipped back to German territory and never seen again. This fueled the Zionist contention that the G.U. was killing prisoners; this would not be confirmed for some years, however.

in 1968, guitar god Eric Clapton lent his talented strings to the song Casting My Spell on Pete Best’s album Mr. Maestro. Clapton’s recreation of the song on tour with Best created some of the most electric moments in modern music, and made the Maestro tour the most highly-touted Best tour of all.

in 4697, the 5 Shen-class ships commanded by Admiral Hu Jintao enter the Yang Gao system and attempt to establish contact with the colony. The ships detect many transmissions coming from the main planet, but none of them seem to be in Chinese. Admiral Hu orders the ships into orbit, but councils caution to all his captains.

in 2003, Estelle Gerard speaks to a throng of people in Jerusalem, telling them that he who sits on the holy throne of the Holy British Empire is not who the Father of all men desires to lead Christendom. As Templars arrive to arrest the toddler and her mother, a bright light blinds the crowd; when the light fades, the Gerards are gone.

Color Barrier Broken In Town Ball

September 5th, 2004

in 1836, William Barrett Travis, savior of the Alamo, was elected President of the Republic of Texas. Travis had been a hero of the new country since his heroic stand at the Alamo mission, where he had fended off Santa Anna long enough for Fannin’s and Houston’s men to surround and crush the Mexican forces.

in 1847, Jesse Woodson James, Missouri’s first Communist governor, was born in the state. James was captivated with President Whitman’s oratory and scouted for the union as a teenager during the Southern Rebellion. This led him into work with the state Communists, and election to the state legislature, U.S. Congress, and finally, the governorship in 1892.

in 1929, George Newhart was born in Oak Park, Illinois. Newhart left his work as a bookkeeper in 1961 to enter the world of folk music with his album, The Button-Down Mind, in which he decried society’s love of the white-collar world of business.

in 1946, since the season was over for them, anyway, the Toledo Mudhens, in a game against their intrastate rivals, the Cleveland Spiders, made Town Ball history by putting black pitcher Leroy “Satchel” Paige on the mound in the 8th inning. When Paige took control of the game, the Mudhens were behind 4-0. By the top of the 9th, they were ahead 5-4, and won the game. Paige returned to start as pitcher for the Mudhens the next year, and despite severe racial animosity, led the Mudhens to championship of the National Town Ball League and the World Series.

in 1972, Semitic-African Resistance fighters captured and held hostage the German Olympic team at the games in Munich. The SARies held off two separate rescue attempts before being killed in a 3rd, taking all the hostages with them. They had been attempting to gain television airtime to detail to the world how their people were being systematically slaughtered, but the German Reich refused to negotiate with them.

in 1997, Albanian actress Agnes Gonxha Bojaxhiu died in Hollywood, California. The Oscar-winner was best known for her performance as Mother Maria Elena in the holocaust drama None Shall Return, in which she played a Catholic nun who sheltered Jews against the Nazis.

in 2003, Vietnamese painter Lu Tong Dao assassinates Massachusetts Senator John Kerry, screaming to those who capture him afterwards, “He was supposed to die!” At his trial, Lu claimed that as a young man, he had seen Kerry die in Vietnam when his swift boat was blown up. The painter was sentenced to life in a mental institution.

in 2003, thousands of people across the Holy British Empire claimed to have seen the Loch Ness Monster walking across the land, heading towards London. In London, itself, many people thought they saw some kind of huge serpent slithering its way into Buckingham Cathedral. Pope Righteous’ spokesman claimed the event was mass hysteria.

The Pearl Street Project; Martian Threat Ends?

September 4th, 2004

in 1049 AUC, Roman Emperor Romulus Augustulus put down the rebellion by Odoacer and had him beheaded in a public ceremony in Rome. Odoacer had attempted to proclaim himself king of the Italian peninsula and break off from the Empire.

in 1530, Ivan the Terrible, known as the Russian Tsar, was born in Moscow. He was the last independent ruler of the country, since after his death in battle in 1579, the Holy British Empire claimed Russia.

in 1882, Thomas Edison’s Pearl Street Project went into effect, providing electric power for all of New York City. The amazing success of Edison’s company and electrification itself led to its adoption by cities across the United States. By the end of the century, no region of the country was without electric power.

in 1886, Goyathlay, also known as Geronimo, was killed along with his Apache warriors in Skeleton Canyon, Arizona. Goyathlay had refused to be herded into the reservations that the American government had designated for all the native people of North America. “I was born on the prairies where the wind blew free and there was nothing to break the light of the sun,” Goyathlay said of his resistance. “I was born where there were no enclosures." The power of the Apache’s example led to widespread Native American resistance against the U.S., and the halt of that nation’s expansion.

in 1953, the New York Metros become the first team to win 5 consecutive championships in the American Town Ball League. Rowdy fans cause havoc in the streets of the Big Apple, snarling traffic and shutting down many businesses; most New Yorkers don’t care, and join in celebrating their home town’s achievement.

in 1957, Comrade Governor Jake Macintosh of the Arkansas Soviet orders the People’s Guard to guard Little Rock’s high schools as racist counter-revolutionaries begin a campaign of intimidation against the African-American schoolchildren of the city; they vow to prevent young blacks from entering schools with whites. In spite of some support from the white population of the city, the racists’ campaign peters out by the first few days of school.

in 1970, former Pete Best bandmate George Harrison released his single, My Sweet Lord. After a brief stint on the top of the charts, it fell meteorically when Harrison was sued for plagiarizing the tune from the Chiffons’ hit, He’s So Fine.

in 2003, Jacob Sheridan and a crew of medics returns to Antarctica to tend to the people who have been turned back into normal humans due to the success of his nanovirus. Livinia Nixon is among the living, and Sheridan takes her back to Australia with him, where they become engaged. American, Canadian and Russian forces begin a similar assault on the mutants at the North Pole. The Martian schemes against earth seemed to be foiled.

The Gregorian Calendar Disrupts Space/Time; Ho Chi Minh Executed

September 3rd, 2004

in 1658, Protector of the English People, Oliver Cromwell, dies at the age of 59. In 1640, Cromwell led a bold experiment in rule by the people without the interference of the nobility, an 18-year period in which all British officials were directly elected by the citizenry. Cromwell had defeated King Charles I and was offered the crown, but refused it in favor of a more democratic form of government, saying, “I am neither heir nor executor to Charles Stuart.” Parliament restored a weakened monarchy after Cromwell’s passing, but Cromwellian England remained a shining standard for many people’s movements, such as the American Revolution and the Communist movements of the 19th century.

in 1752, the adoption of the Gregorian Calendar disrupts the space-time continuum and 10 days vanish for England. People riot in protest at the government’s reckless disregard for the sanctity of time.

in 1791, the great Mlosh poet Klekt’t’kel is born in Clonmacnois, Ireland. The writer of the epic poem, Cries to a lost star, Klekt’t’kel is widely considered the only author of the first Mlosh century who effectively communicated to the human community their profound sense of loss in being unable to return to their homeworld. Klekt’t’kel was awarded the inaugural Nobel Prize for literature in 1901, three years before her death.

in 1911, Dynamic Pictures produces Sunset, a touching film about the end of the “cowboy” way of life in the western United States, starring Mary Pickford. This film gave birth to an entire new genre of storytelling that concentrated on the American West of the late 19th century, known as Horse Operas, or Westerns. Thomas Edison reportedly didn’t like the popularity of the genre, and discouraged the studio from making such films, until he saw Carla Lambert in Plainsgirl in 1916. After that, he let Dynamic’s executives make Westerns as much as they pleased.

in 1914, H.G. Wells organizes London Front, a wargaming convention in London, England. Expecting a few hundred people, Wells is overwhelmed as over 10,000 enthusiast pour into the convention to play Little Wars and Little Warriors over the next 4 days. Much to Wells’ surprise, Little Warriors is by far the more popular of his 2 games, and this leads Wells to develop more games that are along the role-playing line.

in 1955, the band Bill Haley & The Comets, overcoming a fear of flying, booked their first tour outside the U.S. Ironically, the entire group was killed as the plane they were riding across the Atlantic was struck by lightning and crashed into the water. A young Pete Best, who’d had tickets to the show they had been scheduled to play in Liverpool, wrote a song about it in 1969, called Comet in the waves.

in 1969, anti-Reich terrorist Ho Chi Minh was executed by the New Reich’s Chinese Governor in a public hanging in Hanoi. The death of the highly popular Minh made the next three years a turbulent period for the Reich in Asia, as Vietnamese recruits joined with the remnants of the Greater Zionist Resistance to fight the Reich.

in 2003, Livinia Nixon, horribly mutated by Martian technology, kills three members of the medical team working on her and escapes the hospital where she is being kept. She steals a captive Martian ship and pilots it to Antarctica, where she attacks Jacob Sheridan and his team. Sheridan barely manages to release the nanovirus he has created that he has designed to reverse the mutation process; his team then blow up the mutation machine and flee Antarctica to wait for the nanovirus to do its work.

The Great London Fire

September 2nd, 2004

in Hellenic Year 3271, Phidippides of Athens, running from Marathon to seek aid from Sparta against the Persians, collapsed and died at Sparta’s gates before he could deliver his message. The Persians overran Hellas as a consequence.

in 1666, the great city of London was destroyed by 5 days of uncontrollable fire. Tens of thousands of people died in the fires, and the city itself was leveled. Pope Charles declared it the work of Protestant heretics, and orchestrated a massacre of thousands of Protestants in southern England.

in 1863, Human League founder Lyle Fitz-Warren is killed during a fight with a British Terrorism Unit. Fitz-Warren had been holed up in an Islington flat with 4 other League members; when the BTU arrived to arrest him, they tripped several traps the Human League had placed in the building, killing a dozen bystanders and BTU members. The fight to get Fitz-Warren lasted over 7 hours.

in 1944, Senator Prescott Bush of Connecticut loses his son George in World War II. The younger Bush’s plane was hit by German fire and went down, with Bush heroically attempting a crash landing in order to save his crew.

in 1964, Al Sharpton joins the Semitic-African Resistance in New York City. Sharpton rose to become as important a leader against the Bund as Albert Einstein before him.

in 1973, John R. R. Tolkien, renowned English scholar at Oxford, dies at the age of 73. Professor Tolkien’s rendition of the classic tale of Sir Gawain and the Green Knight inspired a phenomenal resurgence of interest in the Arthurian legends.

in 1991, Dean Martin’s 26th Muscular Dystophy Telethon raises over $45 million; “Dean’s Kids” get that much closer to a cure. One of the highlights of this Telethon was Martin’s reunion with his old partner, Jerry Lewis.

in 2003, Jacob Sheridan and 20 of Australia’s elite forces leave for Antarctica again, bearing a machine he has developed. Livinia Nixon comes out of her coma, and nearly breaks free from the restraints on her hospital bed.

Judean Rebellion Suppressed

September 1st, 2004

in 822 AUC, the rebellious residents of the Judean province were put down, but Vespasian chose mercy over retribution, and allowed the Hebrews full citizenship in the Empire after a 5 year period of suppression.

in 4619, an earthquake struck the Japanese province of the Empire, in Kanto. The death toll was in the thousands, and Emperor Chengzu’s treasury was emptied of billions of yuan in repairing the damage. Chengzu ordered his Ministry of Science to begin work on predicting earthquakes, a task they began with enthusiasm; many in the ministry were themselves Japanese.

in 1933, Ann Richards was born in Lakeview, Texas. After her governership of the Soviet of Texas, Comrade Richards became the first woman elected to the Vice-Presidency alongside Comrade President John Anderson of the Socialist Party in 1972.

in 1939, Physical Review, a scientific publication, prints a paper on a phenomenon they call “black holes”, a possible source of en[REST OF ENTRY DELETED]

in 1941, people of Semitic ancestry in German Underground controlled areas of Europe were forced into labor camps, even if they had not been members of the Greater Zionist Resistance. This policy is continued as the Underground gains territory, making allies of everyone who is not quite Aryan in appearance.

in 1347, chieftain Moammar Qaddafi rose to the Caliphate of Libya by defeating Caliph Ibn Rashid in battle. Qaddafi set the tone for his rule by beheading all survivors of Rashid’s government.

in 1995, Dr. Melvin Courtney’s expedition enters the Chimanimani National Park in Zimbabwe. The expedition is looking for evidence of ancient human settlements in the area. In the middle of the day, a rare earthquake shakes the area and uproots several ancient trees.

in 2003, Jacob Sheridan and his team meet with Prime Minister Howard for 4 hours, after which Howard meets for the rest of the day with the U.N. Sheridan goes into his government labs and begins work on a new project.